Last night I told Paul that we need to talk about two things: (1) what to name the baby, and (2) where to put it. He starting groaning and complaining immediately. He hates planning ahead.
I realize we don’t have to make rooming decisions right this second. The baby will sleep in a bassinet out in the living room for awhile, and there are plenty of temporary measures we can take after that. After the twins were born, we had all four children in one bedroom for awhile. It seemed ridiculous to even consider doing it that way, and yet it worked fine: when the two new bedrooms we added down in the basement were finished, we didn’t even rush to move anyone down there. (Now Rob and William have those two new rooms, and the twins share the upstairs room.)
I think there’s this feeling that each child should have his or her own room–and, failing that, there shouldn’t be more than two children in a room, clearly. But if you do it a different way it doesn’t actually end up being as big a deal as it seems like it will be. People would say, “So, did you put the twins in the same room or do they each have their own?,” and I’d say, “Oh, uh, actually all four children are in the same room,” and they’d react as if I’d said we had an outhouse. I can see it myself, because when we realized we needed to temporarily implement the one-room plan, I felt as if we might as well put the kids in large dog kennels in the hallway.
Anyway. I was saying that I know it isn’t as if when the new baby arrives we all have to be in our perfect shining places with everything the way it will be forever and ever; we’ll have time to change things around. It’s more that if I get to choose between packing up and moving rooms around now or in five months when I have a newborn, two toddlers, and two older kids out of school for the summer, I choose now.
I got him to do 10 seconds’ work on the name choice. I handed him the list of the seven names we’re considering so far (Alan, Charlie, Henry, Leo, Oliver, Elliot, Miles) and asked him to rank them 1-7. Then I modified it and said that if names were of the same rank, he could mark them together: 1, 1, 1, 2, 3, 3, 4, or whatever. Here’s how he ranked them:
1: Henry, Elliot, Miles
2: Leo, Oliver
3: Alan, Charlie
That’s not as bad as I was expecting. I was thinking we’d be exactly opposite, but we’re close. I would have ranked them like this (and feel free to rank them yourself in the comment section, if that seems fun):
1: Leo, Oliver
2: Henry, Elliot, Charlie
3: Alan, Miles
So he has one 1st-choice name that is in my “I’m not seriously considering these” slot, and that’s as bad as it gets. I’d worried that he still thought Leo wasn’t a possibility. I’m leaning more toward Oliver at this point (Oliver Henry, that’s kind of nice), but I don’t want to rule out Leo.
Incidentally, how would you spell Elliot? I would spell it “Elliot.” Paul would spell it “Eliot.” And there’s also “Elliott” to consider.
Hmm, those are all great names. I almost hate commenting on peoples’ choices though, because I don’t want to ruin a name for someone. Ok, I’ll be honest (it’s not bad what I want to say). Oliver is my parents’ dog name. I love all the names (that included), it just makes me think of the little black toy poddle.
But, I really like the way Oliver Henry sounds. Here, I’ll rate my favs from your list from my #1 down. Henry, Charlie, Leo, Elliot (I like that spelling), Oliver, Alan, Miles
You have so many great choices. I just kept an ongoing list when I was pregnant. I would look through baby names every couple weeks. I kept changing my mind. And I wanted to wait until I saw the baby to name him. For some reason I just couldn’t put a name with someone I’d never seen. Before he was born I had about 3 (maybe 4) names in mind. One I really liked, and one my husband really liked (that I liked too). They were my top two. When he was born, the name I had picked out did not fit him at all! So I went with my second choice (the husband’s pick). He was a big baby, and the name I picked didn’t seem hardy enough for him. Best of luck with choosing your name. I’m sure whatever you decide will be great.
P.S. Sorry, just thought of the name I liked best from your list. *Henry Oliver* I like that together. Guess it’s just reversed from what you liked. :)
I remember the stress of wanting to have everything ready before Owen came (and this was only for a first baby who has a whole room to himself). Because we are such procrastinators, nothing got done on our former ‘junk/storage’ room before he came and amazingly enough–it was okay. I just kept telling myself that as long as I had diapers and something to dress the baby in, that was what was important.
Our house is 3 bedrooms (one is our office) and we’ve already decided that when we have another baby, he/she will go in with Owen. After that–well, we’ll probably need a bigger house. Personally, I don’t think that little kids mind sharing so much–it might be more comforting to not be alone. It’s later on, when the whole “I need my privacy” starts to kick in that it becomes more crucial. A good friend who has 4 children under the age of 8 (3 boys and 1 girl) actually has the three oldest together in a bedroom (bunk beds) and then the baby by himself in another room and says that it is actually working out better than when the oldest had his own room and the two youngest were rooming together.
I like all your name choices. I think my top three would be (in order of liking most to liking, but less so) Alan, Henry and Miles. I’m so glad that we (my husband and I) just *knew* Owen’s name well before he was born. We had even discussed his name (first middle and last name all together) before we were even 100% positive that he was a ‘he’ and we even agreed that if ‘it’ were to be a boy, that’s what we’d name him. Hopefully any other siblings that Owen might have will be so easily named.
HI! I came here from Sundry’s blog! The five kid thing in the comments got my attention! :)
We have 3 and I know we want 4… but I wonder if I will ever stop – maybe when the uterus falls out??
anyway… hi. I am Sue.
My vote is Henry. It sounds nice with your other children’s names.
Henry Alan. That is my vote for sure!
I will keep reading to find out! :)
Hmm… I really like Elliot the best, no surprise, and then Charlie; that was my grandpa’s name. And I think Leo is a great one. But none of them are bad by any means.
I love love love love love Elliot. And then Henry. :) Not that it matters. They’re such nice names.
I quite like Oliver Henry. :) And Elliot with two “l”s and one “t”. My MIL picked A1’s name (I was not at all pleased, but that’s a different story for another day), so I named A2 after my mother. Sorta. Not obviously 100% after her, since A2 is a boy, but anyway. Hard to explain when only using acronyms! :)
Regarding names: Sounds like you have the choice of Elliot or Henry between the two of you. Henry Elliot sounds nice.
Regarding room sharing: There is nothing wrong with room sharing. I think it is a bad that, as a culture, we shun frugality and sharing. I see too many people, friends even, who have to keep building higher and bigger because they have too much stuff and can’t give their kids their own rooms. Maybe it sounds like I am talking out of my a$$ since I grew up as an only child, but I am not. Adjusting to living with someone is that much harder when you do it for the first time at 18 or older. From everything I have seen, kids thrive sharing rooms. They have to learn how to cohabit, cooperate, be considerate, not be complete and utter slobs. One or two generations back, room sharing was the norm simply because ppl didn’t have the money to buy that much space.
As for us, my son only got his own room at age three. We still apartment live, but as a baby and toddler, we either doubled his room as the office or we had a family bedroom with his bed in our bedroom and his toys kept in a common room wiht the comp and stuff. And he’s well adjusting considering that his parents are blithering idiots.
I’m loving Oliver Henry as well. I have a mental image of him in my head just from the name and it is damn cute.
& I’d spell it Elliot, too.
I’d just warn against using Henry and El(l)iot(t) together since Henry Thomas is the actor who played Elliott in E.T. Just sayin…
If you are bothered by people misspelling names (as I am), stay away from Alan/Allan/Allen too.
As for Miles, I’ve never met one I didn’t like!
My favorite is Oliver (that’s what I named my son a year ago, and have no regrets about it!). Also, my very close second would be Leo. I actually like all of the names you’ve chosen… you have great taste!
Sorry about the late comment, I got here from Purple is a Fruit and I love your blog!
I hate to do this in case my least favorite ends up being what you chose (since I don’t know because you use pseudonyms) but I will say that even when people name their kids things I would never name my kid, I never think “ugh why did they name their kid THAT”. Some names work great for some families that just don’t work for others.
1: Henry, Charlie (LOVE both of these but TWO people I know have sons named Henry, I have a cousin named Charlie and I also hate “Charles” so in all likelihood I won’t use either if I ever have a son.)
2: Oliver (Love this almost as much! Would never be able to use it because surname)
3: Elliot (Like it)
4: Miles (I guess it’s okay but my aunt has an orange cat named Miles and an acquaintance has a horrible brat named Miles, so…not great associations for new baby.)
5: Alan, Leo – I’m not gonna say anything in case you picked one of these names. :-)