Baseball Games and Musicals

Here is the trouble with choosing baseball and musicals as summer projects: VERY TIME-CONSUMING. Our intention was to watch ALL of a particular MLB team’s games, but there are so many games and they are several hours each! If we watch a baseball game in the afternoon, that means we are sitting in the living room for, say, three or four hours; do we then want to sit in the living room for two or three additional hours to watch a musical? And then perhaps spend two more hours watching a baseball movie? Clearly we should have thought this out a little more carefully.

Still, we are enjoying it! I have a notebook I use to keep track of what we did each summer, and I am glad I started lists of games watched and musicals watched, because already I am getting a little forgetful; looking at my notebook, I see we have watched seven baseball games and nine musicals. We are starting to learn the baseball players’ names, and are developing favorites; we are playing soundtracks while making dinner.

We watched In the Heights, which we liked pretty well. We watched High School Musical, which made me think of how Seventeen magazine pretends to be for high school girls but is actually aimed at pre-teens; then we watched High School Musical 2, because we couldn’t imagine what MORE there could be to that story. Now we feel pressured to watch High School Musical 3, but so far have had other priorities. We watched Sunshine on Leith after commenter Shawna mentioned it; I’d never heard of it and really enjoyed it.

And then we watched Phantom of the Opera, which I’d never seen. This paragraph is going to contain spoilers for a 35-year-old musical based on a 110-year-old book. I liked the music pretty well, but I found the plot so thoroughly repellent I almost certainly would have stopped watching it if I hadn’t considered it a cultural literacy project. A grown man, who is repeatedly referred to as some sort of genius though I didn’t see any supporting evidence given for that, lives below a theater as he stalks and spies on and messes with the mind of a young orphaned child, convincing her that he is some sort of “angel of music” and/or the spirit of her dead father, and becomes increasingly obsessed with her as she becomes a beautiful teenager; he builds upon those years of deception and emotional manipulation in order to try to make this young girl fall in love with him / have sex with him / live with him in his gross cave under the theater; and then, when she finds it disturbing that he keeps murdering people and so forth (and we wonder why she doesn’t find it additionally creepy that what she thought of as her dead father’s spirit is trying to seduce her), and she falls in love with a boy her own age, the older man claims that everyone rejects him because of his disfigured face, which isn’t even all that bad, and also claims that NO ONE has ever shown him ANY compassion, even though as a child he was saved/hidden by a girl approximately his own age, now a grown woman who continues to care for him and protect him and make sure he has what he needs as he creepily pursues a teenager she thinks of as a daughter (a situation she KNOWS ABOUT?? and doesn’t do ANYTHING TO STOP??); meanwhile, HE is the one hiding from society, murdering anyone who doesn’t do what he says, and feeling sorry for himself because everyone is “making him” do this. He’s like an exaggerated parody of an Internet Incel guy, and really the best moment of the entire play is when the young girl says “Yeah, no, your face is actually no big deal? It’s your corrupted soul that’s the problem here.” The worst moments are when the actress, who was an ACTUAL MINOR CHILD during filming, has to repeatedly swoon and be groped by and then make out with the actor playing the phantom, who was more than twice her age. The actress also has to make out with the actor playing her fiance/boyfriend, who is approximately thirteen years older than she is—so, if she was 16 or 17, he was THIRTY YEARS OLD. The two male characters frequently fight over who should get to have access to her body, and try to make her reject the other male character in the way they wish; her own wishes are not as interesting to the director as the thigh-high white stockings she apparently wears to sleep in at night, along with a white CORSET and, like, white lace CAPE/TRAIN. And these were all CHOICES: it was a CHOICE to cast an underage girl as the lead, and then dress her that way, in apparently REAL rather than decorative corsets (the actress says she could hardly breathe, and that she thinks they affected her growth); it was a CHOICE to make a minor child the focus of the lust and possessiveness of two much older men; it was a CHOICE to have the child actress actually make out with and be groped by both of those older men (in one case until she had to put ice packs on her lips—I guess they just could not get that scene quite right and needed to do it again and again and again, my goodness what a perfectionist the director must be!); it was a CHOICE to lean into the teacher/father element of the phantom and then have her “tempted” by that rather than fleeing in revulsion and horror. My guess is that I said “THIS IS NOT APPROPRIATE,” like, more than two dozen times while watching the movie; I said “GAH!”/”GROSS!” perhaps twice that many times. Then I listened to the soundtrack while making dinner.

42 thoughts on “Baseball Games and Musicals

  1. Alyson

    Baseball does take forever. It’s a good sport to have on as background (which is the radio thing) and then actually do something else (says the person who pays zero attention to the sportsball minus the occasional interest in Soccer – of the good, read FEMALE, variety.)

    Phantom. I haven’t thought about it since I saw it live a few times in the 90s? And I loved it. In my defense, all the cringe isn’t so much worse than the John Hughes movies we all adored at the time. Also, I like the music. But, now that you mention it and any time I think of the plot of 16 Candles, EGADS. We really sucked in the 1980s.

    I saw something recently (and it could have been in a comment here, I don’t remember) that was all “Andrew Lloyd Webber wasn’t so great. The reason he was SO SUCCESSFUL is because all his competition was busy dying of AIDS in the late 1970s – early 1990s – we lost a generation of (mostly male still) creatives to HIV and ALW was there to fill in the holes. I do not discount this view and think it may be quite right. He’s a little skeevy if you start to think about it. I try not to.

    Did anyone recommend Wicked? I liked that. I’ve mostly moved on from my musical theatre phase, though.

    Reply
    1. Shelly

      I do second the recommendation of Wicked the musical. I DO NOT recommend Wicked the book. How they made even a half decent musical out of that hot garbage, I will never know. (Think LA Confidential level transformational magic)

      Reply
      1. Liz

        I third the Wicked musical recommendation and echo the recommendation NOT to read the book. I utterly agree with the amazement that an awesome musical could be made out of such dreck.

        Reply
  2. Lisa Ann

    I’m an AVID baseball fan and do not watch all the games or, depending on the score, all of the game. Sometimes I’ll just check the score and watch some “highlights”. Twitter is a great tool for this, as is the MLB app (free version). Then again, my team kinda sucks this year so I’m not as compelled to watch as in other years. The radio is also a great resource — say you’re running errands on a Saturday afternoon, you can have the game on while in car. Remember, there’s no crying in baseball!

    Reply
  3. Auntie G

    Life time musical lover and performer. Introducing some of the classics to my kids during the pandemic and…finding more and more of them are just AWFUL through modern eyes. I nearly lost my sh*t at “The Music Man,” for crying’ out loud. (I PLAYED MARIAN YEARS AGO!!!) Really, this shouldn’t be so surprising…they were products of their time just like the books and movies that make us cringe now. What kills me specifically with musical theatre is that so many groups especially in schools keep getting the okay for all this misogyny and racism and…but get slammed for trying to do something more current because it may have some sweet words in it.

    Reply
      1. Shelly

        YIKES, South Pacific! I was in a community theater production back in the ’90’s and thought it was dated. Thinking back, it is ALLLLLLL the yikes.

        Reply
  4. Suzanne

    I saw Phantom many decades ago and can only remember a) loving the music b) being blown away when the giant chandelier dropped. So it was very amusing to read your recap – I had forgotten what it was about in all but the vaguest of terms.

    These summer projects sound so fun and I hope they continue to go well.

    PS My eight year old just became enamored with High School Musical, so I think your assessment is spot on.

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  5. Rachel

    I saw Pantom in 4th grade (and again in 5th, and several more times after that) and fell in love with the music. Yes, it’s creepy, but I still listen to it and it makes me happy.

    Big baseball household here. We have season tickets for our local MLB team and go to about 20 games/year. We also have a minor league team and try to go to a couple of theirs, too. We watch and/or listen to a lot of games, but we’re kidless and we don’t necessarily have to sit and focus the whole time regardless.

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  6. Kara

    Wicked is lots of fun. The songs are great, and it’s so much more modern that it’s not as problematic.

    Miss Saigon- I saw that before the world shut down. It was a production with full size helicopter, which of course was having issues. If you want to see a production about underage sex workers in the middle of the Vietnam war… This is, of course, an updated version of Madame Butterfly, so you could do both musicals and compare and contrast.

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  7. Heather

    Your review of Phantom is spot-on! My husband is a singer and actor and HATES that show for the same reasons it creeps you out, but he has had to sing songs from it at many events because so many people love it. It is funny to be in the audience when he is singing Music of the Night and hearing people talk about how wonderful he did, knowing that inside he was cringing and gagging the whole time.

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  8. Anna

    Hahahaaaaa! Your description of Phantom of the Opera and followed by “Then I listened to the soundtrack while making dinner” is peak musical. So many bad plots in pretty packages. The music! The setting! The costumes! The plot is almost beside the point, but I do find it difficult, as an adult, to ignore the over the top plot twists, inappropriate romances, jealousy, ghosts, death murder death suicide death. Operas are even worse. They started it. Blame opera. Or really, Greek mythology. At least musicals have less incest.

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    1. Anna

      ALSO- here’s the musical-sports crossover you didn’t know you needed: the song You’ll Never Walk Alone from Carousel (such a great song, such a dumb show) has been adopted by some UK football clubs as their anthem.

      Reply
      1. BKB

        Oh, I love that song! I didn’t realize it was from Carousel. I don’t think I’ve ever seen Carousel…

        Reply
  9. Maggie

    I saw Phantom in the theater when I was in college – there were discount tickets for students or something (I don’t remember the details). I seem to have blocked out 90% of the plot (these 30 years later). I just remember really not enjoying it at all. Now I will continue to relegate it to the memory dustbin because the plot summary is incredibly offputting! I mean YIKES.

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  10. chrissy

    I’m a big musical theater nerd, and I loved In the Heights, despite the cheesiness and plot holes. My daughter and I immediately began listening to the sound track, and it’s very upbeat and summery, so I’m enjoying that.
    i’ll give another vote to Wicked. I saw it the weekend before everything shut down, and it is so funny and good. I saw Phantom in the 90’s, and I liked it okay, but my high school french class took a trip to see Les Miserables and let me tell you, I became SUPER obsessed with it. For years! You might like it too. My nerdy high school friends and I used to sing the duet between Javert and ValJean in the car. Okay I did that well into my 30s. It’s very catchy!

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      1. Jenny

        I disagree, I think the story of Les Mis is pretty great! Bad things happen to people (including women) but they are supposed to be bad. There’s a lot about justice and solidarity and Doing the Right Thing in there and what that means. And villains get a complicated comeuppance. I mean, it comes from a 19th century epic, it’s not perfect, but it’s pretty good.

        Reply
  11. Liz

    I can’t believe I never heard about Sunshine on Leith, when I have every one of the Proclaimers albums and have loved them ever since their first album, “This is the Story.”

    Reply
  12. Melanie Dostal

    You should power through and watch HSM 3. It’s a good conclusion for each character 🎀

    Hello Dolly is on Disney + , I think. Fun setting and costumes. You have to set aside a lot of values with these old musicals. Mucho misogyny. I also recommend Pitch Perfect. Can’t remember if you’ve mentioned that?

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    1. Slim

      We saw Bette Middler in Hello, Dolly and wow, it was terrible. I love Bette but the thing has not held up well at all.

      I have a friend who is a huge theater nerd, and I worried when I posted on FB about how little any of us enjoyed it. Luckily, she was all cheerful affirmation.

      Then a few months later, another friend, who I know had seen my post, went and posted a glowing tribute on his page. So, you know, different strokes.

      Reply
  13. Paola Bacaro

    Talking about inappropriateness… There is a lyric in Hamilton that goes “lock up your daughters and horses, it’s hard to have intercourse over four sets of corsets”! And the comedian Katherine Ryan (I think) has a bit in her routine where she talks about how skeevy one song is in regards to consent.

    Reply
  14. Jenny

    Into the Woods, anyone? I liked the film version a lot, and I wasn’t expecting to after knowing the Broadway version by heart.

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  15. Alexicographer

    Hmmm. So (even) as a teenager I remember having a similar reaction to Grease? Like, “good” girl meets “bad” boy and decides she needs to abandon her values and embrace his, even though his values were clearly putting her at risk of things that … they did not pose to him? Did I read that (Grease) wrong? I have never been able to get into it, even though I do (ahem) enjoy the music.

    Not a musical, but I tried watching Mash with my then pre-teen son and … same problem. The sexism! Aiyiyiyi.

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    1. Maggie

      I was 8 or 9 when Grease the movie came out and my parents not only took me to it but bought me the soundtrack (double album – I’m old) which I listened to constantly. It was only when I rewatched and listened to it in my 30s that I realized how truly terrible the messaging and some of the lyrics are (ex: tell me more did she put up a fight). I honestly have no idea what my parents were thinking. The only explanation I can fathom is that it was the 70s and I swear to god the lack of parental oversight/things adults thought were perfectly reasonable for children was . . . extreme. Really it’s no wonder Gen X is a bit of a mess.

      Reply
    2. Kate

      This is my only defence about the fact that I LOVE Grease 2… a movie most people hate but I absolutely adore. And in it the BOY changes his entire persona for the GIRL!

      Reply
  16. Lise

    I’m a total musical theatre nerd and I despise Phantom. If you’d like to see a broader range of musicals, I highly recommend a subscription to Broadway HD. There are a lot of filmed musicals on the site, as well as some film adaptations of musicals.

    Reply
  17. Morgan S

    High school musical 3 has some excellent songs and I love the “may I have this dance” number. I recommend.

    I also really liked teen beach movie 1 & 2. Yes, it is cliche and a bit heavy handed on the “girls can do anything and the modern world is so progressive” trope (we haven’t done that far, sadly). I have a major crush on the male lead and the music is very fun.

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  18. Cece

    Can I tell you my Andrew Lloyd Webber story while we’re here? It’s very trivial but it makes me laugh.

    I stayed at the Ritz Carlton in Toronto for work maybe 10 years ago, and I checked in just as the Toronto Film Festival wound down. There’s a floor where people in fancier rooms can eat breakfast etc (I am NOT FANCY, but I was there to write a piece about the hotel) and ALW was sitting at the table next to me. He started pouting and then called his assistant over from a neighbouring table, and demanded that she ‘do something’ about the ambient jazz musak playing in the restaurant because it was paining him. Still makes me laugh every time that his ears are too delicate for what was effectively elevator music.

    Anyway! Wow yes Phantom of the Opera sounds deeply problematic.

    Reply
  19. Lee

    I listened to Phantom DAILY as a teen musical theater girl, wanted to sing the part of Christine so badly (though I couldn’t really hit that high note well), saw it on Broadway in the 80s, and only had about 2% understanding of the plot you just described here. I feel… duped? Stupid? Swept away by the music OF THE NIGHT??

    Thanks for posting this, it made me laugh.

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  20. Shawna

    I saw Phantom at the Pantages Theatre in Toronto in my young-to-mid-teens (I can’t remember the year but it was definitely the 80s) and I LOVED it! But I didn’t think critically about the plot: I was really swept away by the music, the voices, the staging, the pageantry, and the effects. It was the first big theatre production I’d ever seen and I was totally blown away. I used to sing, and I got the soundtrack on cassette and can still sing along with pretty much all the songs all these years later.
    I feel a little embarrassed that I never really thought about the plot, when it seems so obviously creepy now that you point it out. But I gotta admit, I’m still up for singing along with the songs whenever I hear them.

    Different topic: I’m so glad you liked Sunshine on Leith! Lots of songs from the soundtrack are in heavy rotation on our iPod mixes and I think I mentioned that I use them a lot in my alarms. My dog knows that “Make My Heart Fly” means it’s time for her to eat! The only downside is that I feel guilty when I play it for fun and she’s all excited because she thinks it means dinner is imminent!

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    1. KC

      I watched it and just totally missed there being a plot, because yes, the costumes, the music, the pageantry (plus the audience! and the building was amazing, too); it’s also possible I just missed most of what was spoken. I do remember bits of it; the chandelier, people running around being chased; but I don’t think I realized properly that there *was* a plot, at the time.

      But, anyway, just to layer on to the then-unidentified skeeve factor of the musical, I was there accompanying a 23 year old guy. When I was 17 with next to zero dating experience (I had gone on one “surprise, it’s a date” thing with the same guy, where in theory we were having dinner with a group of people he knew from choir [I wanted to meet more people in choir, since I had joined two weeks prior] and then it was actually a double date with friends of his who were a couple who were at the living-together stage of their relationship and who were not in choir) . *But* then I refused to kiss him when he dropped me off at home after Phantom, telling him it was socially irresponsible to spread the common cold (I had a cold and was idealistic and wanted other people to be idealistic) and I never heard from him again, so good accidental work, totally-ridiculous 17 year old me?

      (obviously, 17 to 23 is not as creepy as the Phantom of the Opera situation. Still nope, though. )

      Reply
      1. Slim

        Not as creepy but still plenty creepy, and he must have known this or he wouldn’t have tricked you into a date.

        ICK. And props to your 17-y-o self

        Reply
  21. Melissa

    Well, my grandma loved Phantom. She had the soundtrack and a music box and a framed picture of the program. I asked her to describe what happens when I was about 10 (1990ish). She described the plot and showed me pictures of the actors. Me: grandma, that sounds like the creepiest thing I ever heard.

    I think she thought I was going to be her musical buddy. But no. Definitely not that one!

    Reply
  22. Sandra

    I agree with you on that. Parts of it are pretty bad, but both the musical (and the book) have an underlying theme of redemption and the bad guys do get their comeuppance. I love the musical and would love to see it on Broadway. I bought the DVD of the 25th anniversary from Amazon (basically some of the original performers singing on stage in London). Wow! You can also find it on Netflix I guess. There is also a 10th anniversary one as well which I also have. Love the music, now I need to go put on the songs again.

    Reply

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