I don’t really know how to segue from New Year’s resolutions and book reviews to whatever I’m going to write about today, considering the gap between posts includes a violent attempted coup in the United States. How does one move right over THAT into a chatty post about how Paul cleaned the bathroom floor by using a Swiffer, half a roll of paper towels, and plain water? Or maybe a post about all the page-a-day calendars I considered for my desk when I needed SOMETHING to do other than doom-scrolling? Or I could tell you about how our credit card information somehow got stolen again, but I don’t think we want to think about how some people get up every morning and decide to do things they know are wrong.
Well. Nine days until Inauguration Day. Sure hope the highly-trained elite force guarding our nation’s capital NOW feels prepared to deal with any coup attempts, so we don’t have a repeat of “Whoops, we accidentally let them all in, and then accidentally let them all leave!” And perhaps we could straighten out ahead of time the little glitch we discovered where it turns out the president is in charge of the National Guard in D.C., and doesn’t have to bring them in to protect Congress and the VP if his own preference is for the coup to continue.
I WANT TO HEAR ABOUT A MAN CLEANING INCORRECTLY PLEASE IT IS A BALM TO MY SOUL
Agreed. Plz provide the chatty balm for our souls (if it is also soothing for you to write).
Same. Bonus points if, after cleaning incorrectly, he announced his triumph proudly, expecting a parade in his honor.
Ha! This is what caught my eye too!
My husband has a mania for using disposable Swiffer dusters instead of, say, a reusable moistened cloth/rag. I am here to say that they DO stir up some dust, despite the claims of dust sticking to them, and that dust resettles (albeit in smaller amounts) back on the thing that was recently “dusted” within about 5 minutes. They are good for poking between blind slats though, I have to admit.
(Incidentally, my fingers initially accidentally typed “rage” instead of “rag” above. I guess it’s been that kind of year.”
) not “. Whoops!
Lord yes. I will think of the times H cleaned the sink, counter and toilet but not the shower or the floor while proudly announcing he’d cleaned the bathroom. At least he used a spray bleach I guess??
I made a deal with my husband once that I would clean the sink/floor/toilet if he would clean the tub/shower. Guess which part of the bathroom ever gets cleaned?
I have been feeling the same way. How do you…? What do you say about…?
I had thought, since about summer….? September…? that my 16yo son had agreed to clean his own bathroom from now on. I thought, “How smart of me! Teaching him independence in this way. (He had been shown how to do this. At least I really thought he had.)
I learned this morning that I was woefully mistaken. ANTOHER TEACHING OPPORTUNITY FOR ME! Hoo, boy.
ok we need this story to distract ourselves!
My children’s bathroom is disgusting, so you are not alone. I had to snake the sink drains recently. I don’t understand how there could be so much hair in a sink drain.
Indeed, what is wrong with people? We’ve had a very stressful situation at home crop up over the last week – unrelated to what went on in the capital. It’s a mental illness issue and it’s impacting one of our kids. Our oldest is already struggling with mental illness, but he won’t recognize it. He no longer lives here and we continue to try to figure out how to help him. This child asked for help. Thankfully. At any rate, it causes me to pause at times and wonder how other people are carrying on? When our world is turned upside down.
And yet, life does continue. We had a lively and entertaining family conversation last night about whether or not Coach might need to re-evaluate his grilling skills. The kids cringed when the cat was out of the bag. Would Coach be upset? Little did they know that he and I were happy to embrace a run-of-the-mill discussion.
What happened in DC is so unsettling. I hope and pray that Trump will be dealt with appropriately and that our country will accept the new president and move forward.
I don’t know if this will be helpful or harmful, but I live about 5 miles from the capitol, and when I drove by this weekend, there were a bazillion heavily armed law-enforcement type people all over the place. So on one hand, they’re prepared, on the other hand, what are they prepared for?
Helpful. <3
As another distraction, a big thank you for your review of The Revisionaries. My husband has to self isolate for 10 days after being pinged by track and trace, and this is just his cup of tea. So have ordered for him.
Echoing others – bring on the balm! I find this warm, thoughtful corner of the Internet to be a wonderful antidote to all the horrors in the world.
And if anyone wants to expand on the cleaning theme, I would be very interested to know how cleaning responsibilities have changed (or not) in homes where families are now messing up the house 24/7. I find that cleaning feels hopeless right now, but also that being home constantly makes me aware of how necessary it is.
My household’s responsibilities haven’t changed, but we already had some balance: my son cleans the kids’ bathroom and downstairs powder room and my daughter sweeps the floors on the main level every weekend, plus she is supposed to wipe table and counters routinely throughout the week as needed; I sort and wash the laundry, the kids fold it and put their own clothes plus the linens away; the kids are supposed to empty the dishwasher, though we all kind of end up doing it; my husband keeps the driveway clear in winter and grass mowed in summer, and ensure that the garbage, compost and recycling are out on time even if that sometimes means asking the kids to do it. I do a very disproportionate amount of the cooking and baking, though with not having to commute 2 hours every day this doesn’t feel as onerous as it used to.
What’s that you say? What about stuff I’ve left out like tidying and vacuuming? Those are really only done on an ad hoc basis, usually prompted by me saying Enough! We must do something about the state of X!
YES! When I used to work from home here and there on random days, I’d always tell myself, “You do not also have to clean the kitchen/put away dishes/fold any laundry today — you are WORKING.” And it was a nice reminder to relax about it.
But now that I’m here all the time, I’ve totally changed my tune. Now I tell myself, “You are ONE person, and if that one person needs to do a little home maintenance during the regular work-day, that is OKAY.”
I’m constantly having these conversations. It’s harder to ignore the home messes, and I’m definitely less work-productive. But overall, I think I’m managing life overall better than I used to…. ? Maybe….?
I am extremely here for all manner of discussion, ranging from the need for consequences for insurrection-inciting politicians (waves listlessly from DC, where I have no voting congressional representation) all the way to how my husband thinks that plunging the tub (……..?) is an adequate substitute for snaking the drain.
Lately I have been feeling that the punishment for insurrection and not participating equally in household chores should be equal.
So much hope for this new season 2021 only to realize We are stuck in a long recap of 2020 that I can’t skip.
I would like to offer an anecdote of hope, which is that when my college-aged son was cleaning up the kitchen last night, he noticed that the sponge was kinda gross and asked (a) if he could get a new one and (b) where we kept them (<– he apologized for not knowing). And when I told him that I had put a new one on the counter that morning and just somehow forgotten to unwrap it, he
brace yourselves
said yes, he saw it now, and wow, how embarrassing not to see something that was right there, and why hadn't he looked harder?
So the next generation will have better men than ours does, is my point.
I find this EXTREMELY HEARTENING, thank you for your service both in raising this man and relaying this anecdote.
Oh please this is my dream. My 7yo child interrupted me in my office today to ask what size baggie he should use for a thing. I pointed out that he could figure this out. He went back to the kitchen and then returned AGAIN to say he needed help. He was unimpressed by my statement that his ability to see and read meant he did not need assistance. Wonder of wonders he managed to find a baggie for his abandoned snack when faced with a clear boundary. PLEASE let this constant boundary and independence training pay off.
I think this might be my calling: reassuring parents that the current form of exasperating behavior will not last forever:
Parents of three-year-olds: The day will come that you will make a routine request of your child and they will say “OK” and do it!
Parents of 13-year-olds: The eye-rolling ends!
My son is 24 and recently moved out to live with his girlfriend 😩. He often (several times per week) texts me with random housekeeping questions and just a couple of days ago actually messaged me to say that he finally realises how much constant work it takes to keep a household going and how he now appreciates all my years of toil! 🤯.
Urgh. I am over this blatant milquetoast response to AN ATTEMPTED OVERTHROW OF OUR GOVERNMENT by frat boys and bullies with guns. I’m so over them getting literally every pop culture or literary reference they refer to COMPLETELY UPSIDE DOWN. (or right-side up but they should think it’s upside down, the Death Star got exploded, the Kraken eats everyone, I haven’t read Orwell but I understand they’re stupid about that, there’s another one that’s more recent and I forget.) C’mon people. Really?
And I just learned more about Jim Jones because, um, did you know it wasn’t mostly white people that he killed and that he did it in Guyana? Because I did not. And he like, killed them outright, not sweet-talked them into a painful death like the Westlake? Calabasas? people with the sneakers? Not Branch Dividian I don’t think…the other ones. Ugh, now I have to google. Heaven’s Gate. San Diego. And I still understand them MORE than supporters of the cheeto. I do. Jim Jones died with them, no? (and now I know the answer to that question too) Our dude was all “let’s walk down Penn Ave together” and then whisked himself to the white house to watch destruction unfold.
Quick tip re: credit card theft:
I have accepted that my credit card # is going to get stolen (or at least replaced as a precaution) with some frequency. I’ve made this far less painful by using a second credit card *only* for recurring subscriptions– Netflix, cell phone bill, etc, everything that I’d have to track down and update immediately. That number almost never gets changed now, and if it does I just pull the last couple statements and go down the list of things I need to update. Also it’s nice to see all those things in one place so I know exactly what it costs us!
Oh this is a good idea. I’m going to have to work on this.
I like to think I’m somewhat financially savvy and have never thought of this. Brilliant. Just brilliant!
What a brilliant idea!
Thank you. Great idea!!
I would love to hear how a person thinks they cleaned a bathroom with water. Did he Swiffer the countertops? I need more information. I was very worried at the beginning of the pandemic that I would be doing everything, as we did have a cleaning person. However, my husband agreed to divide up the chores and commit to cleaning once a week. He does the main living area, the bedroom and all the floors. I do kitchen and bathroom. Every time we clean he says how it feels lighter in the house and it does! Did we have discussions on how to clean the floors without ruining them? We did.
Last week my husband had a credit card opened in his name and two wedding bands purchased. Imagine starting your married life with stolen rings and thinking, “well, this thing is going to go well!”
I share your concerns regarding the unsettling events in DC. We feared we’d be here and here we are.
Oh yes, I love the cleaning conversation.
A welcome diversion to an insomniac.
We had set duties prior to COVID:
Me: Laundry, Cooking dinner, sweeping
Him: Dishes, trash, vacuuming/dusting, bathroom cleaning
We help each other more or have subdivided items.
He helps fold the laundry, cooks dinner half the nights.
I hand wash a lot of dishes to space out the dishwasher runs & help load.
I’m fairly lucky as he does more of the cleaning.
This seems small but representative to me: it’s been making me nuts to hear one person after another state indignantly that this sort of thing doesn’t happen HERE, it happens in banana republics. The implications of that statement are blatantly false, ignorant, and racist. Get it together, America.
In our house, we recently divided the house into four zones, for the four people in the family, which we clean on Saturday: the kitchen, the dining room/ living room/ household trash, the bathrooms, and the basement (which is the TV area.) Each person is responsible for their own bedroom. The zones rotate each Saturday, so no one person is always stuck with, say, bathrooms. We all have responsibilities during the week, too, but the zones have been working great so far.