Speaking of Fools

Don’t celebrity women realize the rest of us KNOW “running around after my kids all day” is not what keeps them a size 0? If “running around after my kids all day” made people thin, wouldn’t….well, I mean, wouldn’t things be very different than the way they in fact are? Office moms would be plump. Stay-at-home moms would be lean. Moms of more children would be thinner than moms of fewer children. Nannies and babysitters and daycare workers would also be thin. Parents would be thinner than non-parents. Women would be having children—or begging to borrow their friends’ children—as part of a diet plan. There would be expensive retreats where you could go for a week for spa treatments and to babysit.

Are the celebrities perhaps LITERALLY running around after their kids? Like, jogging in place next to them all day long? And then not eating any food?

27 thoughts on “Speaking of Fools

  1. beyond

    i think celeb moms are saying that because they are not running after their kids all day long, their nannies are. the celeb moms are working out with their private trainers and planning (low carb yet yummy and nutritious) meals with their private chefs. it’s the guilt that makes them thin, the guilt of not running after their kids all day long. they say it to make regular moms feel like they should jog in place beside their newborns…

    Reply
  2. pseudostoops

    I also like it when celebs say “I do a lot of yoga.” It’s like look, I like yoga too, and it will make your muscles strong, but let’s not kid ourselves about downward dogging to a size double zero.

    Reply
  3. Nowheymama

    Not eating EXCEPT when in front of a magazine reporter, who will then faithfully report, “It is so refreshing to see size-zero [Celebrity] pounding down a double cheeseburger and fries. She really DOESN’T worry about her weight!”

    See also my personal fave, “Breastfeeding is my weight loss secret.” As IF.

    Reply
  4. Hotch Potchery

    I always roll my eyes at those statements. whatever, I could be thin too if someone else did everything for me that causes me stress that then I eat to overcome.

    well, I think anyway.

    Reply
  5. Jiff

    OMG (just for you. lol) I absolutely HATE when I hear celebrities say $h!t like that. It just pisses me off. Sorry. It just does. Do they really think we are that stupid to believe that???

    Reply
  6. desperate housewife

    Or here’s my favorite: “I don’t really diet to lose the baby weight. I just eat lots of lean protein and vegetables and severely limit white flour and sugar. Really carbs in general. But I allow myself treats, of course: fruit salad, a spoonful of Splenda in my coffee, one square of dark chocolate once a week… “
    Um. That’s a diet.

    Reply
  7. Astarte

    NO, no, you misunderstand! They mean, literally running behind their children, as in how they strap little Prima Donna Princess Of The World into her Prada stroller and jog up and down Hollywood Hills all day. Sure, they ate a burger in front of the press, but then the running makes them barf it up, anyway – exercise and purging, all in one!

    Reply
  8. Kim

    Didn’t you know that’s the reason I’m going through all this expense and emotional upheaval? I needed to drop a few pounds.

    Reply
  9. Jeninacide

    LOL! This is hilarous. Especially because I just attempted the Gweneth Paltrow cleanse/detox this week (http://goop.com/newsletter/15) and failed after 1.75 days because, hello?!: I do not have a nanny, maid, or personal chef to take care of my life while I am lying on the couch moaning from a brain-gnawing headache induced by lack of calories and carbohydrates. BOO CELEBRITIES.

    However, I do so much like the idea of possibly renting out my child to people that would like to run after him for me. Sounds like a fantastic business plan! XO

    Reply
  10. Anonymous

    That statement from celebrities has always driven me crazy! It is so unoriginal anyway….they all say that!. Why can’t they say that their nanny keeps the kids for the 2 hours a day that they work out and their personal chef makes really healthy meals?

    Reply
  11. zandor

    I think that if they are going to say things that obviously aren’t true then they should be more creative. I don’t know what exactly, but something else would be more interesting.

    Reply
  12. zandor

    I think that if they are going to say things that obviously aren’t true then they should be more creative. I don’t know what exactly, but something else would be more interesting.

    Reply
  13. Michelle

    Waiiiiit a minute. You mean I can’t believe every word that comes out of a celebrity’s mouth? I’m crushed. Absolutely crushed, I tell you. I do feel better about my body size now though ;)

    Reply
  14. Stacie

    I love the idea of a spa retreat that involves running after children. I volunteer mine. I’ll be getting a massage while you do the running…

    Reply
  15. Anonymous

    Ahh you make me laugh! I always sort of felt bad when I read comments like that, like ‘aren’t I running after them ENOUGH?!’ But you are right, lame line from celebs!

    Reply

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.