T. writes:
We are having a little boy in September. I’ve loved the name Finn for as long as I can remember, and we’re pretty set on using that. The only thing I’m slightly concerned about is that I’ve been told that for a odd-numbered-syllable last name, you should use an even-numbered first name. So, our last name is Milligan, it would sound best with a two syllable first name. What is your opinion on that? Other first names we’re considering are Callum, Conor, and Brendan.
Secondly, we are having a hard time deciding on a middle name. I want to use my maiden name for his middle, so he would be Finn Ricker Milligan. My husband wants his middle name to be Cougar. Part of me thinks Finn Cougar Milligan sounds pretty cool, but a larger part thinks it is a little too weird.
What do you think? Is Cougar cute and unique or just dumb and weird?
If it matters we already have two girls, Teresa Brigid and Nora Merian.
Thank you!
There are no naming rules. I am going to repeat this, because it comes up a lot: There are NO NAMING RULES. There is no such thing as a real rule that says anything about the number of syllables a first name and last name should have. Different names with the same number of syllables sound completely different depending on the particular names—and those completely different sounds will seem great to some people and not-great to others. There is no rule that if your surname has an odd number of syllables, the first name has to have an even number. Pick what sounds good to you.
I would be more concerned with the rhyminess of Finn Milligan and Brendan Milligan. But that too is subjective: some people love when a sound repeats, and some people don’t, and for most people it depends on the particular name. Callum Milligan seems too heavy on L’s and M’s to me, but to someone else that exact same thing will make the name sound like it holds together beautifully.
One of my few almost-regrets in naming is that I didn’t go a little more daring with the kids’ middle names. The reason it’s an almost-regret rather than a regret is that in the long run, I prefer the significance of the names we DID use—but oh, it would have been such a great opportunity to use names like Dutch and Marigold and Fern! Well, but there it is: instead of Dutch, we used my grandfather’s name; instead of Fern, we used a name Paul couldn’t bear not to use.
I do think Cougar makes a very cool middle name—though its current popular usage as a term for an older woman on the prowl somewhat ruins it for me, to the point where it no longer passes the “Is this a name I’d want for myself?” test. Also, I think cool middle names work best with less-cool first names: Finn and Milligan are already so cool, the complete name ends up feeling like it’s trying very hard for coolness. In this particular case, the similarity in sound and rhythm of Finn Cougar Milligan to John Cougar Mellancamp is an additional strike against the idea.
And in any case, I think the significance of the use of your maiden name greatly trumps any coolness factor. The child will have your husband’s family surname, and it seems completely reasonable and appealing for him to also have your family surname. Ricker is quite a cool-sounding name too—and yet, because it’s your maiden name, it doesn’t come across as trying to be cool on purpose.
So my vote would be for Finn Ricker Milligan: there’s no such thing as a rule about syllables; I think the slight rhyminess of Finn/-igan pales in comparison with parental agreement and a long-term love of a name; and I think your family surname is better than Cougar in several ways.
Name update! T. writes:
I just wanted to send in my name update! I asked the question about using Cougar as a middle name. Thanks to you and your readers for all the input. My husband was a bit bummed to see how overwhelmingly negative the opinion was towards using Cougar, and agreed that it was best to use something else. We were excited to welcome Finn Ricker Milligan on September 13th. As most of my siblings seem to use names from my mother’s side of the family for honor names, my dad was quite chuffed to have his last name in there as the middle. Thanks again for answering my question!
Why not use Ricker for the first name? Ricker Milligan.
I like the way Finn Milligan sounds. I like it a lot. I LOVE Finn Ricker. I agree with Swistle though that Cougar reminds me too much of old ladies on the prowl. I also think that a middle name is a good place to use a name you wouldn’t normally consider. We have 2 examples of that within our 5 kids.
Caitlyn’s middle name is Renee, and while this is not a wildly out there name, it was a name I liked that Ed would never in a million years consider for a first name. I’d put this in the camp of “It was a name I couldn’t live without”.
Angus’s middle name is Westley, after the character in The Princess Bride. We *almost* switched it to Westley Angus at the last minute because we liked it so much. Anyway, his name is all kinds of unconventional, but his middle name was a fun way to incorporate something that we both (actually the big kids to) love.
I agree with every word Swistle said.
Callum Milligan runs together too much because of the 2 M’s. If you are still open to considering new names, I’ll offer Collin & Cormac as options instead of Callum.
Brendan Milligan is OK. I do notice the rhyme but it’s not too much for my taste.
Finn Milligan is fine for me as far as number of syllables. But I do notice the rhyme and it personally isn’t something I care for. But, like Swistle said, this is subjective so it’s not really a Big Deal. Have you considered something like Griffin Milligan with the nickname Finn? It lessens the rhyming effect for me & changes the number of syllables you seem concerned about. Griffin is also pretty high on the coolness factor, so perhaps a good compromise for you & your husband?
As for Cougar as a middle name. Um, no. The middle age “Cougar” is a problem for me. But even more importantly, I think the significance of using your maiden name far outweighs using a name just because it is “cool.” It also sounds like Cougar is just a wee bit outside of your personal comfort zone, so I think that’d be the 3rd strike against it. If your husband must have Cougar, then perhaps it could be his special nickname just between the 2 of them. As a nickname, it fits right in with things like Tiger or Champ.
Finn Milligan is a bit of a tongue twister for me. I keep wanting to say Finnegan. I also personally don’t care for rhyming names, though I know some people do. Just things to keep in mind. If you say it aloud and love it, use it!
I really love Finn Ricker Milligan. I would use it.
I love Finn, but I think it might not be the best choice with your last name. When I said it aloud, the repeating short-I made it a little sing-songy to my ear. And like S above, I kept wanting to say “Finnegan.” Of your four choices, I like Conor and Brendan better.
On the other hand, Finn is a name you’ve loved for years and it’s not like it’s a highly teasable issue or unfortunate initials, just a little rhyme. If you’re not too bothered by the rhyme or the possibility of his being called “Finnegan,” I think you should use it. Best of luck!
Finn Ricker Milligan is a fantastic name!
I think Finn Ricker Milligan is pretty cool!! If you want something different, but are not sure on Cougar, what about Cash, Jax, Axel, or Gage?
Just speaking to the MN thing: I really like Ricker as a MN, and agree with Swistle that is has that elusive “cool without trying” quality, whereas (for me) Cougar is pretty much a “trying to be cool” name. So I think the choice is clear!
I agree completely – Ricker is cool without trying as opposed to trying very hard to be cool. Finn Ricker Milligan sounds great!
I keep wanting to suggest Finley instead of Finn, but I see that it’s more widely used as a female name than male. (But it IS used as both, so… maybe?)
Finn Milligan keeps bringing to mind the “Michael Finnegan” song on one of my daughter’s kids CDs. The song repeatedly says, “Poor old Michael Finnegan, Begin Again” and my mind inserts “Poor old Fin(ley) Milligin, Begin Again.” (Lyrics: http://www.kidsongs.com/lyrics/michael-finnegan.html)
Also, I want to suggest Cash or Dash(iel) for you. These just seem like they may be your style, and they’re certainly what I’d consider cool-but-not-terribly-trendy names.
Oh. Also. I hate to even suggest not using your maiden name in the middle name spot, BUT … A friend recently named his son Fox, which seems right in line with Cougar but without the old-woman-after-young-guys connotation. Totally retains the coolness factor. Also allows you to buy tons of cute little fox trinkets and stuffed animals and clothing. :) Although it doesn’t work with Finn very well, it might work if you end up looking at other first names.
Conner Fox Milligan
Ricker Fox Milligan
Dashiell Fox Milligan
Lucas Fox Milligan
… maybe a repeat of the “uh” ending on your girls’ names? Such as
Micah Fox Milligan
Judah Fox Milligan
Michael Finnegan song came to mind for me too! However I really like the sound of Finn Milligan and love the Irish connection with all your children’s names. Cougar does sound super cool just a pity about the modern meaning and Cougar Milligan does sound a lot like Cougar Mellancamp. I like the idea of using your maiden name but maybe keep thinking of another cool daring middle name perhaps another animal, I’m going to keep thinking bout that one for you. Go with Finn!
Finn Ricker Milligan is a great name! I hope you use it :)
Cougar as a middle reminds me of a little boy I know who’s middle name is Cub. He more often than not goes by Cub, and I always thought it was a neat name. Other animal names could be Bear, Lion (or Leon), Tiger.
But in the end, I like your maiden name best!
I would REALLY not want the middle name Cougar myself because of the association of older ladies on the prowl. It’s clearly a well-known usage of the term – there’s even a show called Cougar Town!
What Swistle said.
Oh! And also – my kids have a friend named Coogan. I don’t know where the name came from, but I do like it better than Cougar. (It’s a first name in this case, but would be great for a middle.)
I don’t notice the rhyme in Finn Milligan. I like it! I think Finn goes well with Nora, too.
I like all of your choices. Callum, Conor and Brendan all sound great with Ricker Milligan. Finn Ricker Milligan is a lot of ”i” but its still a great name. I dont think Cougar is the best choice but its a nice direction. Wolf and Fox are both cool animal names that work a bit better.
Did anyone else think of John Cougar Mellencamp? That was the first thing that popped into my head.
I think Finn Milligan sounds fantastic and I like the sound of Finn Ricker Milligan too! It’s your favorite so just go for it!
Conor is also one of my all time favorite names so I’m leaning in that direction and Conor Finn Milligan is adorable! I also think Cougar is a bit much but for some reason it made me think of the name Jagger!
Finn Jagger Milligan perhaps?
All the best!
Oh… What about the name Ronan? It also has that Irish feel you like!
Ronan Finn Milligan
Ronan Conor Milligan
Ronan Ricker Milligan
Good luck!
What about using the name Finley as the formal name – Finley Ricker Milligan? I also like Ricker as a first name for a boy. Is it pronounced RICK- er or RY – ker? I like the sound of RY – ker the best. Best wishes to you.
I love Finn Ricker Milligan! Two thumbs up; one for the sound/style, another for the fact that it just so happens to include both of your surnames. How lucky!
When our twins were born we wanted to give them middle names after a good friend of ours who had died so our twins are jack Steven and Noah Krueger. When I say Noah’s middle name people who haven’t seen it written think I’m saying cougar and it has met a negative response. This hasn’t bothered me because I correct them and explain the significance. I just mention it because if you choose to use Couger, you may want to make sure you’re prepared for the negative association.
Finn Ricker Milligan is a great name, but I’m not as fond of Finn Milligan, for many of the above reasons. BUT! I DO LOVE the name Ricker SO much. I would go with Ricker Gage Milligan.
Also, is anyone else desperate to someday find out the names of Swistle’s kids? I know why she doesn’t put them on her blogs, I get it, and I respect it, but I’m still so curious ;) Someday, maybe when they are all grown ups? On the other hand, maybe it would totally mess with me b/c I’ve been thinking of them with their English royalty monikers for so many years. Dilemma!
I think Finn Milligan sounds fine, not too rhymey for me. I also like Conor, Brendan and Callum, but I don’t like how the m’s run together in Callum and Milligan. I don’t really like Cougar, agree with the trying to hard to be cool thing and I did think of current term for middle aged ladies pursuing younger guys. Oh yes and I did think of John Cougar Mellencamp!