OMG, do you even, do you even KNOW how life-changing your comments were on the post about turning down extra shifts? I just. It’s not even. Listen: the part about how if you say yes more, you get bumped up the list and they’ll call more? The part about the caller going for what’s easiest? The part about how if I say no more, they might still CALL, but with managed expectations? The part about how if I keep taking shifts I don’t want, I’ll not only be resentful but also be keeping them from doing what they OUGHT to do, which is to hire another employee? Gold. GOLD. These are not things I had understood, and as soon as I read them they clicked into place. Life-transforming. Really. They called TWICE MORE yesterday, and both times I said sorry, I couldn’t, and already, ALREADY, there was a change in the tone of the response—like she was already assuming I’d be saying no, so she wasn’t disappointed. And by the third request, there was even a change in the tone of the request: as if she was just checking just in case, instead of that she thought there was a large chance of success. And all that aside, I went from thinking the only benefit of saying no was about my own character development, to thinking that saying no would actually change for the better the way things would happen. YOU IMPROVED MY LIFE SUBSTANTIALLY.
Let’s see. I know I had one million little tidbits that were NOT about jobs, and this would be a great place for them. My mind is still almost completely preoccupied with Job Thoughts, but I’m getting tired of it. I appreciate the mental stimulation, but enough is enough.
Okay, the cats. The cats have twice recently had these big howling spats. One cat had a bleeding paw after the last altercation. Now that paw doesn’t smell great, but I can’t see what’s wrong with it. Maybe something with the nail? He won’t let me get a long look at it, and it’s hard to tell what’s a little spike of matted fur and what’s not. Nothing looks obviously infected or gross. Well, nothing looks that way to ME. I’m a little worried I’ll take him to the vet and the vet will say, “Um, Idiot: there is a big splinter sticking right out of the paw pad. Just. I mean. You keep me in business, so thanks, but.” Yesterday I dipped the paw in some hydrogen peroxide for a minute or so, and then he spent a lonnnnng time cleaning it, so I’m hoping that will help.
Summer! Summer is flying. I don’t usually say that. I’m not going to say the J-word, but I think that’s why: I’m home less, and I have something stimulating to think about, and I’m much more appreciative of time at home with the kids now that there is not quite such plentiful abundance of it, and now that I am thinking, “Ooo, good, I don’t have to work today!” Also, every year the kids are older, and every year that improves my summer.
The children are mocking me for the way I say sixth. I say it as if it were “sixed”: no “th” sound. I CAN say it with the “th” sound, but only very carefully/slowly: “Six…th.” I can’t go from the x to the th without changing mouth gears. And when I do, it sounds wrong, like I’m pretending to lisp the word. I admit, I’m hoping here for “HEY ME TOO, I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST ME!!”
Hair. I still haven’t cut it. What happened was, it got Too Long and I decided to cut it—but I couldn’t decide if I just wanted a couple of inches off or if I was sick of longer hair and wanted it to the jaw line or so. I asked Elizabeth, and she said, “Whatever you do, don’t just get it cut to, like, here,” and indicated her jawline-to-shoulder area. I laughed since that was EXACTLY what I had in mind, and I said, “WHY?” and she said, “It’s so MOM.” Me: “…But I AM a mom.” Elizabeth: “STILL.”
So then I was even more unsure. It’s not like Elizabeth is the boss of my hair, but. Well, I was influenced. And then I ended up waiting so long, it went out of the stage it was in, and into a stage where the extra length was good again. Hair always seems to do that: it goes through little awkward In Between stages. Laziness and procrastination means I get through those stages and then end up with what feels like a new style without getting it cut.
Re: the cat. My vet explained that their nails can break right at or under the pad, and then they can’t get them to heal. They can get a bit of litter in there, and then infection sets in, and it can get to be a horrible mess. If it doesn’t heal up in a day or two, see the vet for treatment. Re: the job. Yay! So happy it’s working out, and totally engaged in your story.
I wonder if it would be a little less Mom if you got it cut on kind of an angle? I find that to be de-mommimg my hair lately.
Just finishing up 2 weeks of meds for the dog from the same paw issue, if it’s any consolation. Vet said it was a nail bed infection. Also, the cat’s eye lid was half swollen all morning, so I rushed him to the vet’s earliest available appointment. Apparently the 15 minutes in the car had magical healing powers, because he arrived 100% normal and the vet couldn’t find anything to even look at. Of course a few days later the eye returned to half swollen. I’ve gotten pics this time, but am sure the vets see this a lot. Frustrating and embarrassing individually, but I find comfort in blending with the crowd on this one.
I have a few words I say incorrectly. Of course I can’t think of them off the top of my head right now, but my husband loves poking fun. I started paying attention to how others say them and noticed one in particular my entire immediate and extended family says “wrong” like me. So I blame it on environment! Haha
1) I work 2 days a week and it helps me appreciate the kids a million percent more.
2) sixed – my family is made entirely of blue collar, south side of Chicago people. Sixed, dis, dat, dem all sound right to me. I usually use the “th”‘ when speaking, but the “d”‘or “t” in place of “th” sounds right. True story: my husband and I got into a legit argument when he tried to tell me thong sandals was not pronounced like salad tongs. Like. Yelling. A dictionary was produced. And, uh, I was incorrect.
3) hair. I am growing out a pixie cut and alternate between “I should keep this style! Such a cute length!” And “I will never look appealing to anyone again.” It’s approaching my chin in length so I assume I have a year or so of Elizabeth unapproved length before I can be happy. Maybe longer. Sigh.
I love the tongs story!!! I think this is a similar situation to anesthesia. I hear a lot of folks say ann-es-TEE-zuh (including Tina Fey) instead of an-es-THEE-zuh. I’m from upper MIdwest, lotta Scandiwegians around here, and I hear more T sounds when there is a tricky TH.
Fun!
I have never ever ever heard anesthesia pronounced with the th sound. Ever ever! I am in the South. So funny how different it is.
I live in Chicago and we almost all say an-es-THEE-zhuh where I work.
I work at a hospital. I don’t even wanna say where in the city, but anyway. My point is that we have lots of occasion to say anesthesia.
Same here, medical environment kind of pushed me into the THEE camp :)
I have the same problem with the word anesthesia as I do with the word sixth. I say it anna-STEE-zhuh and can’t figure out how to make my mouth do a “th” sound there instead.
It won’t help with the “sixth” issue, but I found that saying “AnnaS-Thee-Zuh” was the trick for me. My mouth won’t let me do “Sth” all together, but I can break it up this way and then it’s fine.
What’s the “J-word” – ? I’m totally blanking! First day back at work after 12 days off. That’s my excuse and I’m sticking to it!
I say “ruin” wrong, supposedly ;-)
Yes about hair and its various acceptable/non-acceptable lengths! My current problem is that I have a layer that is just now fitting into a ponytail, so I wear a ponytail too often, causing breakage and split ends. Thus, the layer never gets any longer.
Oh – JOB!
Duh
Hah! My husband says “sixth” oddly and I mock him ALL THE TIME about it. He says it differently than you though: he says “sick-th” – so he’s got the full th sound, but none of the x/s sound before it. I giggle every single time he says it. Sikth!
Ed Sheeran sings it that way in his latest song (Photograph?), and that one word always jumps out at me as a cute little quirk.
Thousandth. I taught college algebra for awhile so it came up a lot. I decided it made me more approachable and, like, our teacher knows math pretty well, but she can’t really talk, so maybe math isn’t so hard!
I’m originally from a town called (stalkers, pay attention) Kemptville, and have been mocked by a friend for pronouncing the “t”. What seems unfair is that the mocker is not from there, and her evidence is that she’s supposedly met many… Kemptonians? Kemptvillians?… people from there and I’m the first who has pronounced it, therefore it should be said “Kempville”.
I will admit to a habit of saying the “b” in subtle and I know it’s not normally said that way. And every now and then I get caught saying “sham-ee-lee-on” instead of a hard “k” sound for “chameleon”. I attribute to reading it a number of times as a kid before hearing it said out loud, but then you’d think I would pronounce the “ch” sound and say “cham-ee-lee-on”, no?
Char loat ee I thought it was CHAR LOAT EE’s Web!!!
I still remember the illuminating moment when I realized the written word chaos (which I was mentally pronouncing as cha-ose) was the same word I had been hearing as kay-oss. I was stupefied! Stupefied that they were in fact the same word and not two different words that meant basically the same thing!
I had a similar experiences with other words before. The most recent example being Victuals and “Vittles.” I had read the word before, pronouncing it in my head as vickt-U-uls, and heard it, assuming it spelled something like vittles, and while reading through a listicle recently learned that they were same word. I had no idea.
Well, that blew my mind! I had no idea either!
anxiety! I remember a song on sesame street called anxiety that explained what the word meant, but I did not know it was the same word in writing til someone read it out loud in eighth grade. Mind. Blown.
I can’t say “library” properly without being very deliberate. I grew up in middle Tennessee and had a very strong accent growing up; the accent is mostly gone now but I still want to say “li-burry.”
My husband from East Tennessee says Li-burry too!!!!
I am a scientist and have to measure things in tiny volumes very often – microlitres are my most common measurements of volume, which are a thousandth of a litre. I can’t say thousandth. Like, at all. It’s awkward and abrupt and just an awful word to say out loud.
The comments on your posts (as well as the posts themselves) are often very helpful for me so I’m glad to hear they are helpful for you too!
Re hair: yesterday I cut my hair with the kitchen shears. One of those days. It’s at time like this when I am glad I don’t have daughters. My sons don’t know the difference between a good and bad haircut.
I did that once! Just…couldn’t stand it another moment. Six inches of hair in the sink. (I’d meant to take off more like three inches, but. One side was shorter. And then the other side. And then the back.)
I cut my own hair a few months ago! It felt remarkably freeing. I just couldn’t bear my split ends for another second, so I watched a couple of YouTube tutorials on how to cut your hair in a ponytail on top of your head (it creates subtle layers) and I did it! I have since been to the salon, but I am REALLY lazy about going, so it’s nice to know I can do it at home when times are desperate, and no one is the wiser.
I can say “sixth” but I cannot say “forwarded” (it comes out for-ward-ed-ed) or “different” (I say diff-ernt). I also frequently say “din-test” instead of “dentist” and that’s a new one for me, so I have no idea where it came from. I think I said it wrong once a few years ago and got teased and now when I go to say it that memory is right there & it forces it to come out wrong.
Only moderately related but I’m telling this story anyway. Oldest constantly ribs me about enjoying Josh Groban. Oldest: Mom! This music is for middle aged ladies!! Me: I . . . am a middle-aged lady, so….
I don’t really dig his music BUT have you heard him sing the tweets of Kanye West? That Josh Groban has a serious sense of humor and I love that he doesn’t mind mocking himself. See also: James Blunt on “Top Gear” (rip, top gear)
My husband sometimes pokes fun at how I say “antenna” because APPARENTLY I make it rhyme with “Montana” and that’s… not how it’s supposed to sound? I have to think about it before I say it or else I say an-TAN-nuh instead of an-TEN-uh.
My husband can’t say the word thief. It comes out thieth every single time.
My husband says g + as instead of g + ass to describe car fuel. My MIL did that, so I guess it’s where he got it. I HATE IT. I don’t know anyone else who says it that way, and I went to college near where she grew up.
Re the cat and the vet: I think part of the point of the vet is their experience in handling animals. So if the cat won’t let you get a good look at his paw, that is where the vet’s value comes in, even if it turns out to be something you could have taken care of yourself if it had happened to a more cooperative patient. We used to get the vet to clip our old cat’s nails: maybe we could have done that ourselves, but no one would have enjoyed it much.
Maybe I missed a post (hope not!) but what are the kiddos up to while you’re working? I’m not at that point yet but wonder how moms with part time jobs handle the summers.
Right now I’m doing almost exclusively evenings and weekends, when Paul is home. Sometimes there’s overlap (that is, I leave for work before he gets home), or I do a short shift midday, and then Rob (16) babysits.
I asked my husband how he pronounces sixth and he looked at me blankly and said, “but today is the seventh”. I guess it’s a question that only mattered yesterday. Lol.
My problem words are any in which an N comes before an M. I swap them – cinnamon becomes cimminon, enemy/emeny and so on. I’ve even managed to mangle domino, and that’s one I should have down!
I had a friend who pronounced it Ger-om-ih-no in high school when we went to see the movie. we were all dying over her inability to say Geronimo, including her.
My husband is often pointing out that I say peenk instead of pink, bay-sill instead of basil, and apparently do not pronounce Don and Dawn differently enough. Yet when he says all of those words “correctly” I cannot hear a difference in how I pronounce them.
Oh! But *he* says pah-prih-kuh while I say pah-pree-kuh and also er (rhymes with her and fur) for err (to make an error).
My daughter currently says waterlemon or lemonade when she means watermelon. But she is just two so I suppose it is a different sort of example altogether!
I can’t figure out how Don and Dawn would sound any different if said out loud, if it makes you feel any better.
Yeah I grew up in Alaska (with midwestern parents – IA & IL) and live in MN now…Don & Dawn sound exactly the same out of my mouth (and in my brain)!
My mom pronounces everything that begins with “wash” (wash, washing, Washington, Washburn, etc.) “wush” and it drives me around the bend. She has a regular midwestern non-accent for absolutely everything except that ONE word.
It DOES.
To me Don rhymes with gone and Dawn rhymes with lawn.
To me, gone and lawn rhyme! I’m cracking up here!
There’s a quiz somewhere where you answer questions about pronunciations and it will tell you where you’re from within a couple hundred miles or something. It pegged me, and I always felt my speech didn’t quite fit with my area. Such fun stuff…
There’s a difference between Don & Dawn? Not in western Canada — move here and you’ll fit right in then! :) (There’s also no difference between Erin & Aaron here.)
My son couldn’t say meatloaf or applesauce. For some reason we just joined him in the mispronunciation. Forty years later, our family still dines on Meaf-Loaf and boppasops.
My best childhood friend’s parents moved to Illinois when she was a small kid. It then became apparent that she (Dawn) and her father (Don) would be asking callers to spell the name of the person to whom they wanted to speak for all eternity.
Are Dawn and Don pronounced differently in other areas??
I pronounce them very differently: the -o- is a different sound than the -aw-. When I say it, the -o- of Don would be similar to the “Ah” of “Ah, you’re here!” (but the -o- would be a slightly shorter sound than the Ah—it isn’t like Dahhhhn). The -aw- of Dawn would be similar to the “Aw” of “Aw, you have to go?”
I’d be interested to know if the examples I’d give that RHYME with Don/Dawn would also be pronounced with no difference in sound, in places where Don/Dawn is the same. For example, Don rhymes with bon-bon, while Dawn rhymes with brawn; in areas where Don/Dawn sound the same, do bon and brawn sound the same (except for the R)? Don rhymes with the way I say con, eon, non, on, upon, Ron. Dawn rhymes with the way I say fawn, gone, lawn, the awn- part of awning, pawn, prawn.
And which WAY is it the same? That is, are people saying both like Don, or both like Dawn? Like, do people who say Don/Dawn the same also say awning as if it were onning? Or are they saying awning the same as I would, but they’d pronounce Ron like Rawn?
Interesting. It drives my father nuts that neither my mother nor I can hear a difference between Don and Dawn. (I was raised in the Deep South, but my parents weren’t so I don’t really have the accent.)
For me: bon and brawn do rhyme. They both are closer to Ah than Aw. I might say lawn, awning and fawn with a little more Aw to them, but could comfortably “make” them rhyme with all the other ones.
I saw Dawn and Don the same and all your examples rhyme to me. The only one that is marginally different is Ah (as in ah ha!) and Aw (as in aw shucks) and even the different is tone rather than sound. Ah is higher pitched and aw is lower pitched and falling. My accent is a mix of the US West and South.
I SAY Dawn and Don the same, not SAW.
I’m LOLing over all these pronunciation comments. My sister always pronounces crayon to sound like “crown”.
Hi I’m a lurker but I love your blog so much. I too have trouble with sixth and anesthesia. My sixth gets toungue tied in the middle coming out more like Sixt-th and my anesthesia sounds like yours. What kills me though are words that end in th’s. They end up sounding terrible. Faith’s car becomes Face car unless I make a full stop between the th and the s.
YES, I have trouble with that too! I just tried the “Faith’s” example and had to do it “Faith. Ss.”
My husband pointed out to me a few months ago that I say “cotta cheese” instead of “cottage cheese.” I didn’t know that I say it that way, and if I’ve always said it that way or if it’s a new thing for me, but now that he’s brought it to my attention, that combination of words sounds so CLUNKY to me, as it would be to say “de el” in Spanish instead of the contraction “del.” (“Cottage-jeh-jeh-jeh cheese!”) :)
Yes Swistle, those all rhyme. It’s called the Mary/merry/marry merger colloquially.
Ha! I love reading about the sixth and th pronunciations. When I was 7, I had my permanent teeth knocked back into my gums and they grew out wonky and so began years and years and years of dental work. I have ALWAYS blamed my lack of ability to say the “th” on my various fake front teeth (1 tooth, then a bridge, then 2 fake teeth, then 2 implants and crowns….). I always figured my lips just never figured out where to sit on my teeth to say those letters. I feel almost…normal now reading these posts!
I also say Don and Dawn very differently, like Swistle described. When people say them the same, I think they are using the Don pronunciation for both. I use the “aw” sound for Dawn, as in “awwww that’s cute”
This same issue makes people pronounce the word “watch” differently. I use the “aw” sound, but others use the “ah” sound. I pronounce it like waw-ch.
People also think I say ruin wrong. I say it like roon. Rhymes with spoon.
I went to school in the South, and people said “pin” and “pen” the same. That used to drive me crazy.
A lady I work with says “Phil” like “feel”. I always think it sound funny when she pages him.
Ok, I’m done now.
How do you guys pronounce “tour”?
I say it somewhere in between “toor” (rhymes with moor) and “two-er” (rhymes with do-er).
TOO-er
My husband’s grandmother was first gen American born to German immigrants. She always has taken Thylenol for pain and wrapped leftovers in alunium foil. We tried to correct her. She never heard the difference.
I would love for you to post a sound clip of you pronouncing Dawn and Don. While I do pronounce Dawn slightly different from Don, the Aw vs. Ah sound is nearly imperceptible so if I were to call a Don/Dawn household they certainly wouldn’t know who I was asking for. The comments got me so curious that I listened to pronunciations on YouTube and only could hear a clear difference in the “Connecticut accent” clip.
This makes me think of my MIL who doesn’t hear the difference between “ih” and “eh” in many words. We’ve teased her bc she honestly hears no difference between the pronunciation of pin and pen and often talks of the pet setter (sitter) coming to take care of her dogs.
Here’s the Youtube clip of Dawn and Don. Is this similar to how you pronounce it? or am I like my MIL and have an ear untrained to hear the difference?
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=cCMqFC2lefo
Yes, that’s similar. The Dawn pronunciation isn’t quite the same: it sounds to me like the person “has an accent,” but it’s recognizable and within range of how I’d say it.
I’m from Indiana and I cannot hear a difference between Don and Dawn or pen and pin or Jen and gin. My husband is from the Chicago suburbs and the difference is clear to him. I also say groshries instead of groceries but it is a grocery store. My high school friend Brad made this funny series of youtube videos on how to speak Hoosier. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=swqaM4TiX2I
I agree–“sixth” is such a difficult word to say! Another one for me is “asked.” It always comes out sounding like “assed” when I say it, which bothers me SO MUCH but if I want to say it correctly I have to slow my speech way down. (I mean, people do comment a lot on how I talk significantly faster than the average person, but still.)
This is fascinating! I always considered myself Mary/merry/marry merged, because they all sound the same to me, as do Erin/Aaron (I’m Kerri, and didn’t know until college that some people pronounced it differently that Carrie). But I do pronounce Don and Dawn differently, like swistle- Don rhymes with on and upon, Dawn rhymes with fawn and awning. Maybe I’m partially merged? I’m from Western new york, if that matters.
I also have difficulties with “asked”, which has been bothering me lately. I really have to stop and say it slowly if I don’t want to say “assed”.