April writes:
After struggling to conceive, my husband and I have been blessed with a pregnancy. We are due October 1st. DH doesn’t want to know the sex of the baby, and I don’t have strong feelings about needing to know, so we’re preparing two sets of names. The names need to fit in with several family traditions. We’ve decided to use his last name (Moore), but my family of origin traditions for first and middle names.
Traditions
1. In my family, the middle name Oliver is a tradition for the first born male in a generation (it’s my brother’s middle name, my grandfather’s middle name, my great-grandfather’s middle name etc.). Since I am the first sibling to have a child in my family, I’d like to use Oliver in the middle for a boy.
2. The second tradition in my immediate family is to have the initials spell out an additional name. For instance, my initials spell AMY. I loved growing up with a “secret” extra name and want my child to have the same gift. Also, I think my parents would be thrilled if I carried on the pattern they started with my siblings and me.
My husband and I have had no trouble coming up with girl names to fit this pattern. Currently, our favorites are Genevieve Elise (GEM) and Penelope Alice (PAM). We wouldn’t turn down more suggestions at this point, since we have a ways to go yet, but we need much more help with a boy’s name. Other first names for girls that we like but that don’t fit the initials pattern include Celeste, Lydia, and Cecilia.
The boy’s name is giving us more trouble since there are two traditions restricting our choices. Basically, with Oliver in the middle, the most reasonable option is to find a first name starting with T to get to TOM. If we don’t use Oliver, we are considering Simon Arthur (SAM), although I’d probably rather break with the initials tradition than the Oliver tradition, so maybe we’ll just reserve that for a second boy, if we are blessed enough to have one.
Here are a list of boy T names we have come up with and all of the crazy reasons we have for not liking any of them:
Theodore – We love this name. Sadly it rhymes with Moore.
Toby – Reminds us both of a dim-witted character on a television show that we both watch.
Truman – Husband says he won’t name child after president who bombed Hiroshima.
Terrance – The nickname Terry drives me nuts. I suggested Ren to the husband as an alternate nickname idea, and he hates the idea.
Timothy – Makes me think of Tiny Tim or Timothy Titmouse — which both seem annoying to me.
Titus – Husband says it has the word ass in it, so it’s out.
Troy – We both like this name. However, we’re living in upstate NY right now and to our neighbors this is a city that they don’t like.
Thomas – Way to common with the last name Moore. Also the same name as that of famous people from the past. My father-in-law has a super common first name and when combined with his last name, it’s a huge hassle with identification (incorrect bills, court orders etc).
Tristan – Love the meaning behind the name, but for some reason it sounds a bit prissy or nerdy to us and our child is likely to be a nerd, so we don’t want to make it to hard for him.
Travis – Nothing actually wrong with the name itself, but it’s the name of a professor I had in college that I disliked.
Trevor – I like it, but Trevor Oliver sounds awkward to me with the double r ending.
Thaddeus – It’s okay, but for some reason it just always sounds like it being said wrong to me. Also, Thad Moore sounds similar to the name of a summer camp that I used to go to and that’s just strange to me.
Trent – Reminds me of the politician Trent Lott, which is not positive for us. Also, the Council of Trent, which just seems odd.
I keep feeling like the perfect T name is out there, but since I’m already a name nerd, I’m starting to lose hope in the idea that there is a T name I haven’t thought of yet. Perhaps I already know the perfect T name, but I just need someone to help me see it in a different light? Swistle, you always give great advice — want to give it a shot?
Another possibility is to go for the initials DOM. Or, if it’s okay to use more than one middle name, you could do COLM or NORM. But I agree with you about going for TOM if possible: it practically cries out to be used here.
When I was expecting Henry, Matt Lauer and his wife had a baby boy and named him Thijs, pronounced Tice. I have Dutch ancestry and so does Paul, and I also immediately loved the sound of the name, so I spent quite a bit of time trying to figure out how to use that name in the United States. My conclusion was that I didn’t think the spelling was possible to use here without a lot more hassle than I was willing to take on, and I didn’t want to Americanize the spelling.
It seems like a good possibility here: it’s like Titus without the…tu. Tyce Oliver Moore. Both Ty and Tyson are familiar enough to pull Tyce with them. The flow isn’t perfect, but with two traditions to satisfy, something else may have to give.
For that reason I also think Trevor could be reconsidered. Trevor Oliver does have a little repeated-endings issue, but will you be saying the names together often? Or, wait. Actually, “Trever Moore” makes me think of what the raven kept quothing.
Thatcher would be cute, though. Thatcher Oliver Moore.
Or would Trevin work? Trevin Oliver Moore.
I also want to revisit Theodore, since you both love it. I’ve been saying Moore more like “boor” or “moor” than like “-dore” or “more,” but the rhyming issue leads me to believe I may saying it wrong. (After all, I rhyme the words “door” and “poor” with “more,” so Moore could be the same.) Plus, if you’d mentioned Theodore without mentioning the issue with the endings, I would have pointed it out even pronouncing it like moor. And after saying Theodore, I’m more likely to pronounce Moore to rhyme with it. So it IS an issue, but maybe it’s not a deal-breaker. Or you could go with the stand-alone name Theo, but I think that might lead people to put it with Moore as if it were Theodore: “Theomoore.” Well, maybe it IS out, but I’m reluctant to let it go.
Would the name Tobin still make you think of the dim character Toby? Tobin Oliver Moore.
Your husband’s objection to Truman sounds like it isn’t up for discussion, but I feel like discussing it anyway. Using a name doesn’t mean it has to be “after” everyone else who had the name—and certainly not after a PARTICULAR previous owner of the name. President Truman is perhaps most people’s primary association with the name, but if people said “Oh, after President Truman?,” there is room for saying “No.” Well, fine, I see the reasoning and I guess it’s off the list. It’s just such a great T-name, and it’s great with your surname, and I think of it as a surname name rather than a tribute name—but I understand how it is when an association takes over a name. In fact, I think part of my woe here is that I didn’t previous associate Truman with Hiroshima, and now I do.
If the main problem with Thomas is that it’s too common, you could use Thomason or Thompson. Thomason Oliver Moore; Thompson Oliver Moore. I think I prefer Thompson. But in talking about it with my mother, she brought up the point that having a name with the nickname Tom might take away the entire point of having a secret initials name.
Thaddeus/Thad makes me think of Todd. Todd Oliver Moore. Does that sound just as much like the camp name?
Teagan is used more often for girls than boys, which is too bad because it might fit the bill perfectly. Teagan Oliver Moore.
The Baby Name Wizard also lists Teague for boys, and that’s not being used for girls at all. Teague Oliver Moore.
Oh, or Tiernan! Tiernan Oliver Moore.
It’s rare in the United States, but Timon is one of my favorites of the T names so far. It sounds like Simon, without any Simple/Says issues. I’d expected it to get more common when everyone was searching for ways to get to the nickname Ty, but it didn’t. Timon Oliver Moore. [Never mind: I see from the comments section that I was wrong about the pronunciation.] [Second edit: Well, or maybe I’m not wrong. HowJSay says it to rhyme with Simon. Pronounce Names shows several pronunciations, starting with the one that rhymes with Simon. Timon’s Thoughts says one pronunciation is to rhyme with Simon. The Bible Workshop says it rhymes with Simon. The Shakespeare Glossary says it rhymes with Simon. Babynamespedia has it rhyming with Simon. The Baby Name Wizard says it rhymes with Simon. So I’m putting it back on my list.]
Name update! April writes:
I am proud to announce the birth of Alice Younglove Moore.
My baby girl was born on September 21st, so we did not have to worry about boy names in the end. However, after discussing your decide first names first policy we decided not to do initials spelling a second name for our daughter either. Instead, we opted to make a family connection to my side with her middle name as my maiden name. Also, her initials AYM are an anagram of my initials AMY.
Thank you for your advice! We’ll keep it in our back pocket if we ever decide to have another. :)
I’m attaching a picture of our perfect little one to this email.
