Michelle writes:

Good morning. I have a bit of a baby name conundrum and could really use some help. We are trying to come up with a baby girl name and have a name that we love, but there is a problem. We love the name Claire Elizabeth Welter (whatever first name we choose, the middle name will be Elizabeth. It is my middle name, it was my great grandmothers name, it was my great, great grandmothers middle name, etc. My grandmother always expressed an interest in passing this name down. I love it, so I would like to do that). My husband and I both love the name Claire. This should be an easy decision. However, my sister-in-law lost a baby to Trisomy 18 about 3 years ago at 26 weeks. They named their baby girl Blair Elizabeth. My husband is worried that Blair and Claire are too similar, especially since the middle names would be the same. The more I thought about it, the more I agree with him. However, a number of people that I have talked to didn’t seem to think that it was a big deal. My question is, should we even continue to consider this name, or should we move on to other names? We do have a short list of other possibilities (Ellie, Amelia, Charlotte, and Lyla) but both just love Claire so much. We have a two year old son named Jack Ryan already, so our only real criteria beyond the middle name is that we do not want the name to start with a J. Thoughts?

Thanks so much!

 
My opinion is that it’s too close, but let’s have a poll over to the right to get a group opinion. [Poll closed; see results below.] At first I thought it might be okay (it’s been several years; it’s not exactly the same name), but as soon as I imagined being a family member hearing the name of the new baby, I flinched hard. If it were just the first name I would already be hesitating, but the one-two punch of first and middle seems too painful—and unfortunate for your daughter, too, to have her name so evocative of a family tragedy.

I think it can be very hard to move on and choose another name after something like this. The natural inclination is to compare each new option to the unusable name and find it wanting, instead of choosing which usable option is the favorite. One mental trick I’ve found helpful is thinking of other situations that would render the name unusable. For example, in your situation I might think “If our surname were O’Hare, we wouldn’t be able to use Claire” or “If my husband’s first wife’s name were Claire, we wouldn’t be able to use it” or “If my husband hated the name Claire, we wouldn’t be able to use it.” I’m not sure why this works for me, but I think it’s because it reminds me that there are many reasons names can be ruled out, and that we all have our own groups of such names.

Perhaps if you have another daughter later, you could use Claire as her middle name (it’s what I’d be suggesting for this daughter if the name Elizabeth weren’t already set). Or perhaps a name like Clarissa would work: it has much of the sound of Claire, but I no longer get a strong flinch from Clarissa Elizabeth.

Or do you like Cecily, Celeste, Cora, or Corinne? Or Abigail?

Or Rose. Rose Welter; Rose Elizabeth Welter; Jack and Rose. I love that. I like the repeating Z sound, and Rose has the sweet simplicity of Claire. [A commenter points out that Jack and Rose are characters in a movie. I wonder if Hope would work? Hope Elizabeth Welter; Jack and Hope.]

Or Eve. Eve Elizabeth Welter; Jack and Eve.

Or Lucy. Lucy Elizabeth Welter; Jack and Lucy.

Or Grace. Grace Elizabeth Welter; Jack and Grace.

Bethany writes:

I wanted to write to you to share this name-journey with other readers who might feel the same other sense of unease with name and encourage them to keep calling their baby a variety of nicknames and name variations, rather than starting to feel gloomy about choosing the wrong name.

My darling girl is twenty weeks old, and it has honestly taken me this long to come to terms with her name and feel quite proud of it. I did not experience the sort of baby name regret that is mentioned occasionally on your blog, but I did not feel so at peace with the name we selected for our daughter. It just didn’t seem to stick the same way her brother, Daniel Henry Hyde, seemed to stick with me instantly.

I think its taken four months to get to know her as Elsa Catherine Haid, and four months for me to put away the other names (Eliza, Anneliese, Elise, Elissa, Joanna, Mirabelle, Beatrice, and more) that weren’t chosen. I think it took four months of calling her Elsa Kate, Elsie, Elsa Catherine, Elsabug, my sweet Elsa to make it feel natural.

Elsa was my husband’s #1 choice and he feels such pride when others comment on the name’s beauty. It was not my first choice, but I do really like the name now, especially when I call her Elsa Kate, which is how I introduce her to others.

The advice you and your readers gave sent us in different directions. I was first concerned about a name that would sound good with the German vowel pattern of our last name. You and your readers helped me see that its not such a big deal. I really liked the suggestion of Elsa Jane for the way it sounded, but having no connection to any Janes and wanting a bit of a namesake, we named her Catherine, which is my paternal grandmother’s middle name. I enjoy that she was born the same week Catherine Middleton married William, and it was fun to hold my little Elsa Kate and watch the wedding.

So in conclusion, I’d like to implore your readers to not get stuck in the muddy waters of baby name regret. At first, I started thinking about how I the name Elsa was too much like Melissa and Elsie was a lot like Kelsey (both names I don’t really like) instead of focusing on my daughter and the beauty of her name. I thought about the name Elsa meant I can’t have an Eliza or an Elissa or Elizabeth. I should have been thinking about how wonderful and special it is that her father lights up when he says her name, that its a lovely name, and that its a name she can be proud of since its sturdy and timeless and classy and feminine.

If you voted this morning in the triplet-name poll, you’ll need to re-vote: the parents wanted their surname removed from the post and poll, and poll questions can’t be edited.

A. writes:

Hi, we are expecting BBG triplets in a couple months and are debating between (1)Andrew, Wyatt & Everly or (2) Sawyer, Wyatt & Everly. Could you please tell me which name set you prefer?

Thank you!

 
I prefer Sawyer, Wyatt, and Everly, for four reasons:

1. Andrew and Wyatt together bring Andrew Wyeth immediately to my mind.

2. [Edited after parents requested surname be removed from post:] With your surname, Andrew makes me think of a sound-alike celebrity’s name.

3. I think Sawyer and Wyatt are particularly well-coordinated brother names, better coordinated in style than Andrew and Wyatt.

4. I like how Sawyer, Wyatt, and Everly are all surname names and all have a Y—but without seeming at all matchy.

Let’s have a poll over to the right to see what everyone else’s favorite set is! [Poll closed; see results below.]

Autumn writes:

My problem is a little different than the typical name indecision issue you cover at Swistle, but I hope you and your readers can give me some advice.

I love names, and I spent a long time picking out the perfect name for my first son. I settled on Edison Byron. I wanted my son to have his own unique name, but I also wanted to honor my Dad, who doesn’t have any sons of his own. My Dad’s name is Edward but he goes by Ed (or Eddie with my Mom). I thought Edison was perfect, since he could go by Ed / Edi.

So what’s the problem? This baby is the first grandchild, so naturally everyone is excited. My sister told me while I was pregnant that she was going to have her own special name for my son. I told her I’d wanted veto power over any nicknames she wanted to use, and she became very upset that I was so controlling. She said that what she wanted to call my son was her decision. I let it drop and figured I’d deal with it later, especially since she lives far away and likely won’t see Edison very often. Just recently she came to stay for a few weeks to meet her nephew and help me out. While she was here, she decided that referring to Edison as Ed or Edi was “too weird”, because that’s my Dad’s name. My sister decided that she will call him E, and now my mother has started to use that nickname!

I don’t like the nickname, for 3 specific reasons. One, I picked Edison with the intention that my son would either go by his full name or Ed / Edi in honor of my Dad. Calling him E entirely routes around that. Second, I have a strong preference for other E names and am considering an E theme, and I love the name Beatrix with the nickname of Bea…but I would hate to have an E and a Bea. Third, (though less important) the name E just sounds more edgy than my own style (though it fits really nicely with my sister’s style).

How do you and your readers typically handle family nicknames? Should I try and stop this nickname, or should I not worry about it? Since I understand that it’s a little weird to suddenly have another Ed in the family, are there other nicknames I can offer that will still honor my Dad?

Thanks for your help!

This is a very tricky issue, because on one hand I can vividly imagine how teeth-clenchingly annoyed I’d be if someone was calling one of my kids a nickname I didn’t like—and on the other hand, I don’t think much can be done without being more aggressive than I’d ever want to be about such a thing. It’s so easy for other people to say “It’s YOUR baby and YOU get to decide…” or “Don’t LET them…” or “You need to INSIST that they…” when the scenario is happening in their imaginations (which is also where we tell off our boss and that mean girl in high school), but much harder to do it in real life—especially when nicknaming rights are a grey area.

I can’t tell from your letter whether you’ve already explained your reasons to your mom and sister. If not, that’s where I’d start: I think it’s easy for people to object to being told what to do, but much harder to persevere when they’ve heard the perfectly understandable reasons not to. I would particularly emphasize the potential future-sibling-name problems and the honoring-dad-with-the-nickname issue (and in fact might skip the style one). I would do the whole thing calmly and nicely (tone should be requesting/explaining rather than demanding), perhaps with quavering voice and tears threatening to brim. I think I’d start with your mom, since I think she’ll be easier to convince and then she might be able to help with your sister (and also because later in this post I’m going to discuss the possibility of allowing your sister to keep using the nickname, in which case you’d only need to talk to your mom about it).

(I’m not accepting your sister’s argument that it’s weird to have another Ed in the family. Plenty of children are named after other people, and it might be a little odd at first but then everyone gets used to it. Plus, if Ed/Edi is too weird for her to get used to, she can call him Edison. Her argument that she wants to have her own special name for him holds way more sway.)

If they know your reasons and are doing it anyway, I’m stumped. I’ve heard stories of people teaching their children rude comebacks, or using ultimatums such as “You can’t see him unless you call him what _I_ want you to call him,” but for me those would be “only in my mind” techniques. I’m imagining if my much-disliked mother-in-law had insisted on calling one of my children a name we had a specific and reasonable reason for objecting to—but even THEN I don’t think I would have used the destruction of a family relationship as my threat of choice. Maybe I could have managed something like a wincing “Oh, I’m sorry, but we REALLY don’t want him called that.” Again, I’m not sure parents DO have full nickname control—or if they do, it doesn’t last past the point where the child can make his or her own decisions about what he or she wants (or is willing to be) called, at which point perhaps your son will (politely!) tell his aunt he’d prefer to be called Edi.

This is the part where I suggest that another possibility is to allow his aunt to call him E. I generally dislike the nickname Kris and generally wouldn’t want anyone to call me that—but one set of my grandparents DID call me Kris, and my aunt (their daughter) still calls me Kris sometimes, and it’s just different: to me, when THEY use it, it’s “their special name for me,” losing all elements of “a nickname I dislike.” I can imagine a boy might really enjoy being called E by his aunt, even if he didn’t want other people to call him that.

It’s different, though, if the nickname catches on, as it looks like it might if your mom is already using it. Again, this is where your sensible reasons seem like they’d come in handy: you have legitimate concerns here, and perhaps even if your sister won’t change (which might be okay or even better than okay), you can persuade your mom and others not to join in. If someone new calls him E, you can say, “Actually, he goes by Edi: E is just his aunt’s special nickname for him.”

Sarah writes:

I’m 37 weeks pregnant and we have no name for our son. We have a son Brian (father’s name) Reed and he goes by Reed, a daughter Evelyn Anne (she sometimes goes by Evie), and a Lucy Margaret. Our last name is Marchese (Mar-k-z) which is Italian but as you can see we haven’t really gone the Italian route with any of our names. Each of these names we really love and this time we are really struggling to find a name we both love and agree on. My family keeps making fun of me because I have so many “rules” about this name but I would really like something that goes well with Reed, Evelyn and Lucy. First, I really don’t want an “L” name because Lucy is right before this one. I also don’t want a name that ends in a “y” since we have a Lucy and Evelyn goes by Evie sometimes. And finally I don’t want an “R” name because I would rather both boys not begin with the same letter. OK so maybe I do have a lot of rules but in my hormonal brain it all makes sense.

Here are a few names on my list:
Nathan (call him Nate)
Gabriel (call him Gabe)
Ezra
Jonah
Noah (one of my brothers names which I love but not sure I want to use)

Here are a few of my husbands picks:
Jude (which I like but then we have a Lucy and a Jude which makes me automatically think of the 2 big Beetles songs)
Beck
James
Oliver (We just had a friend that had an Oliver so that’s kind of off the table)

As you can see these lists aren’t that long. We are just really stumped! I’ve never been this close to my due date without a least some idea of what we would name our child. We’ve been searching baby name books and the internet with no avail. Please help!!!! Oh and our names are Brian Acra (family name) and Sarah Elizabeth.

Thank you!!!!

Looking at the three sibling names, I thought of how comfortably all three names would go in the credits of an old black-and-white movie. Trying to think of what other names would fit in that line-up (more brainstormy-type thinking than actual reality, as you’ll see), I immediately thought of Grant and Clark. Grant Marchese; Reed, Evelyn, Lucy, and Grant. Clark Marchese (maybe too many shared sounds with surname); Reed, Evelyn, Lucy, and Clark.

Or Nolan, or Spencer. Nolan Marchese; Reed, Evelyn, Lucy, and Nolan. Spencer Marchese; Reed, Evelyn, Lucy, and Spencer.

Or John, or Jack. John Marchese; Reed, Evelyn, Lucy, and John. Jack Marchese; Reed, Evelyn, Lucy, and Jack.

Or Hudson, or Holden. Hudson Marchese; Reed, Evelyn, Lucy, and Hudson. Holden Marchese; Reed, Evelyn, Lucy, and Holden.

Or Davis, or Harris, or Dean. Davis Marchese; Reed, Evelyn, Lucy, and Davis. Harris Marchese; Reed, Evelyn, Lucy, and Harris. Dean Marchese; Reed, Evelyn, Lucy, and Dean.

I also like Gabe from your list, or the similar name Gage. Or James is excellent, I think.

M. writes:

We are expecting our third child mid-September, though I think it will show up sooner. We don’t know the sex of the baby and I don’t have any strong feelings either way.

Here is some background. We already have two boys named Atticus and Avner. Their last name is both of our last names and rhymes with Axel Fur. We didn’t plan on having two A-names for the boys and are a little self-conscious about it. We’ve been pretty adamant that we *don’t* want another A name, although in the last few days I’ve been softening as there are so many great A names! (I also acknowledge that our banning of A names has probably made them even more attractive this round.)

We’ve done what you don’t suggest and know what the middle names will be. The boys have middle names that honour family members (my FIL and my deceased brother) and we’d like to honour a dear friend who is no longer with us. Her middle name was North and we’d use that for a boy. If we have a girl, we’re going to saddle the poor thing with two middle names–our friend’s first name (Azra) and Joan (which was my Nana’s name and also is the middle name of both my mother and my sister). Yes, we’re thinking of being crazy and giving the poor child FIVE names! One first, two middle, two last. It’s over the top, but I kind of don’t care at this point. I am NOT having another child, so let’s blow our load on this one!

I’ve got a long list of girl names that I like and that I think would fit–Harriet being the top contender as far as I’m concerned, with some other names being Lois, Alice, Agnes, Margot, Ivy, Iris, Hazel–but we’re still searching.

Boys names are so hard! I feel like there are so many things that we have to consider that no name will work: no A name (but they’re the best!), no name that sounds like a last name (as the mn sounds like a ln and he’ll already have two lns, poor soul), something not too common, a real name, nothing poncey or with too many syllables. I want it to be strong, a little tough, but something that would go with his siblings. For example, I came across the name Tiernan and thought, that’s a good name, but then realized it sounded like a yuppie child’s name. I want a name that would be as home on the oil rigs as the theatre as the doctor’s lounge. (I know Atticus doesn’t necessarily fit that, but…that was five years ago!) Some names that we’ve been talking about are Ivan, Silas, Callum, Orson (a last name, but I love the meaning: little bear/bear cub, as this baby has very much been one in utero). A names that are suddenly very attractive because they are verboten are: Ansel, Ambrose, Amos, Anders, Arlo.

In the past we have a strong list of about eight names and wait until the baby was born to name him and are hoping to come up with lists that we’re both happy with. Also, just to make things even that more difficult, we’d prefer a name that doesn’t lend itself to nicknames.

So, as you can see, we’re a mess. I would love to hear your thoughts and access the hive mind of your readers.

Thanks so much!

It was my mom who brought my attention to the fact that many people have “favorite initials”: one or two initials that tend to be heavily represented in their name lists. One of my mom’s is K; one of mine is E. (Most people also have a couple of least-favorite initials.)

If you were planning more children than three, I think I would be encouraging you to avoid A names this time around lest you paint yourself into a corner. But if you’re pretty sure you’re stopping after three, and if A-names tend to be the ones you love most (rather than ones you feel pressured into using), I find it appeals to me to think of you with your three little A-name children. I think it can be a fun family thing—and with only three, it hasn’t gone far enough to seem odd. And it looks to me as if your A-name list is more consistent with your style than your non-A-name list. I think you could go either way: if the favorite name starts with an A, or if the favorite name doesn’t start with an A, there are good things about either decision.

My attention was caught by Orson, because although I don’t like the way it flows with the other names, I DO like the bear thing. I Googled bear names, and found this list, which has several good possibilities. (Watch out on this and other bear-name lists: the verb “bear,” as in “many famous people bear this name,” leads to many sorting errors.)

More suggestions, non-A or A, bear-related or non-bear-related?

Stephanie writes:

Ok, so we have one son and his name is Lincoln Daniel (last name is Irish and starts with an M and ends with a Y). My name is Stephanie Marie and hubby is Daniel Raymond. If this baby is a boy we have the name Nicholas James picked out. Nicholas is after my late uncle and I just love the name James and my husband happens to have an uncle on each side named James.

Girl names are what we cannot figure out. I do NOT like Nicole for a girl. My husband has a pretty big family and does not want to use any of their names for first names. This is fine with me for the most part because there are a lot of repeats already (ie. 2 Coleens, 3 Irenes, etc.). However, I LOVE the name Lauren, but he has a young first cousin named Lauren with the same last name. There aren’t really any other family names that I like for a first name. My great-grandmother was named Valentina, but I would only want to use it as a middle name. Oh, I am due in Early March but will probably deliver sometime in February. Other names I like are:

Noelle (not sure about using it when baby is not born close to Christmas)

Laurel

Brenna (hubby doesn’t like it)

Such a short list. I don’t feel like Valentina pairs well with any of these. My family is Ukrainian and there are a few Ukrainian names that I like, but just sound silly with an Irish last name. I also like a few french names, like Cosette, Colette, Juliet, Gabrielle, but I don’t even know anyone that’s French and I don”t feel like our families will identify with those names.

So, what name pairs well with Lincoln and can stand up to an Irish last name and flows well with Valentina? Or maybe you can think of another middle name that sounds better.

 
I think Laurel Valentina is great. I think it flows well, and that Lincoln and Laurel is a cute sibling set—better even than Lincoln and Lauren, which seem like they might cross the matchy line.

(The comments section on the post Baby Naming Issue: Using the Name Natalie For a Baby Not Born at Christmas might be of some use on the Noelle issue, even though it was written about a different name.)

Though Cosette and Colette still sound French to the U.S. ear, I think Gabrielle is nearly as mainstreamed as names like Nicole and Michelle and Danielle (which sound a little French, but probably in the same way names like Patrick and Ryan and Kyle sound a little Irish), and that only the Juliette form of Juliet seems French. Depending on which French names you have in mind, that could be an excellent category to revisit. Or, some French names have an Anglicized version (like Juliet for Juliette): if, for example, you like Cecile, you could consider Celia. If you like Clarisse, you could consider Clarissa.

Do you like Eloise? It’s French, without being alienatingly French. I love it with your surname, and with Valentina.

Or Josephine? Maybe too many shared sounds with Valentina. But if so, French names often make wonderful middle names because so many of them have the emphasis on the second syllable: Josephine Celeste, Josephine Colette, Josephine Noelle, etc. It might be a nice way to get a French name you love, without as much of the worry that it won’t fit right with your family.

I wonder if your husband would like Bryn (or Brin) more than Brenna? Bryn Valentina M_____y; Lincoln and Bryn. I would prefer to avoid the initials B.M., though.

Lincoln is a surname name—but because it evokes Abraham Lincoln (and because it’s been in the Top 1000 as a first name since at least 1880 when the public online Social Security records begin), I think it sounds good with early American names like Abigail, Molly, Ruth, Emily. Molly is perhaps not right with your surname, and Emily might be too common—but I like Lincoln and Abigail, Lincoln and Ruthie, Lincoln and Amelia, Lincoln and Lydia, Lincoln and Eliza, Lincoln and Margaret, Lincoln and Clara, Lincoln and Cora, Lincoln and Adeline, Lincoln and Alice.

Rebecca writes:

I’m 38 1/2 weeks pregnant, and I’m hoping you can help me with some last minute indecision. My husband and I are expecting a boy (or first) any day now. Since the beginning we have been using one name, and it wasn’t until recently that both of us are starting to doubt our choice.

Our last name is Anderson, and my first name is Rebecca (usually shortened to Becca) and my husband is Nathan (shortened to Nate by everyone but his parents). There were generally three things we were looking for:

1. I’m Jewish and want to have something in the child’s name that is either Hebrew or reflects that fact that he’s not fully Scandinavian

2. The name Rebecca is so common I want to avoid the same thing for my child. I want to avoid top 10 names if possible, but don’t want the name to sound made up.

3. (Less important) We both have shortened names that our friends use – if possible I’d like to give him a name that he can use with everyone.

The name we’ve been using is Eli (full name Eli Nathan Anderson). The thing that has me a little concerned is that Eli ends in a vowel and Anderson starts with one. When I say it out loud I’m concerned that his first and last name run into each other if his middle name isn’t in there. Other names we’ve considered are Jack, Charles, Elliot, and Hayden – but none of these really fit the criteria we’re looking for and I’m not in love with any of them.

Any advice?

 
I said “Eli Anderson” out loud a few times, and it doesn’t run together for me. For comparison, try “Elias Anderson,” which comes out “Eliah Sanderson” or just “eliasanderson.”

I think if you’ve both liked this one name all along, it’s unlikely that your current doubts are anything more than the very common “WAIT!! Are we SURE??” feelings that keep most of us up at night at the very end. I found it reassuring to leaf through the baby name book Just To See, and also to think to myself, “If he doesn’t look like a _____ when he’s born, we have plenty of time to rethink.” (For me, both exercises resulted in feeling better and keeping the original name. Results may vary.)

(See also: Baby Naming Issue: Last-Minute Doubts.)

Miranda writes:

I absolutely love your blog and am in desperate need of some boy name advice! I am 22 weeks pregnant with my second boy and am having a terrible time naming him. I think my problem is that I used my two favorite boy names with my first son. His name is Lane Gray. I definitely pictured having two little boys named Lane and Gray, but knew I wasn’t guaranteed a second boy. What do I do!? We have other names that we “kind of” like, but it feels like we are settling. Gray is a family name.

I thought about using Roe as a middle name for this baby because it is also a family name that I like.

Here are a few names we kind of like so you can see our style:

Reid

Graham (have close family friends who used this recently)

Quade

Crew

Shepherd-Shep (husband isn’t too crazy about this one)

William-Will

Taft

And most of these do not work with Roe. Our last name is Lawrence. I also don’t know how important it is to stick with a one syllable name (because our favorite girl name is June)…? We very much appreciate any advice or suggestions! Thank you!

My opinion on the 1-syllable situation depends on (1) how many children you’re likely to have, and (2) whether you’d LIKE to do 1-syllable names for all of them. If, for example, you’re planning three children, and it appeals to you to use 1-syllable names for all, and you think you could choose a third 1-syllable boy name if needed, then yay, fun challenge! But if, on the other hand, you’re planning four children and you’re out of 1-syllable names if you have two girls / another boy, then I’d suggest breaking the pattern now so that it isn’t a problem later. Or would you like a 4-letter-name pattern, instead of a 1-syllable pattern? Another thing to consider, if you do use Roe as the middle name: would you feel trapped into using 1-syllable names for all first names AND all middle names?

For 1-syllable options, I’m going to be taking a lot from the the Brisk and Breezy section of The Baby Name Wizard.

My first suggestion is Cade. It’s similar to Quade, and I think it’s nice with Roe. Cade Lawrence; Lane Gray and Cade Roe.

I have a soft spot for the name Wade—and it’s even more similar to Quade. And “Lane and Wade” has some of the same sound as “Lane and Gray.” Wade Lawrence; Lane Gray and Wade Roe. [Edit: Oops, see comments section about the Roe vs. Wade association. Even Quade and Cade might have too much of that sound for comfort.]

Quinn Lawrence. Lane Gray and Quinn Roe.

Grant Lawrence. Lane Gray and Grant Roe. It has much of the sound of Graham, which would have been my favorite from your list if it weren’t for your close friends recently using it.

Clark Lawrence. Lane Gray and Clark Roe.

Finn Lawrence. Lane Gray and Finn Roe.

Flynn Lawrence. Lane Gray and Flynn Roe.

Nash Lawrence. Lane Gray and Nash Roe.

Dean Lawrence. Lane Gray and Dean Roe.

Keane Lawrence. Lane Gray and Keane Roe.

Hugh Lawrence. Lane Gray and Hugh Roe. I’m not sure about Roe with it, but I like Lane and Hugh. I wonder if Hugo works any better? Hugo Lawrence. Lane Gray and Hugo Roe.

Theo Lawrence. Lane and Theo. I’m not sure Theo Roe works, but I like Lane and Theo together.

Reid Lawrence is my favorite from your list. Whether Reid Roe works or not depends mostly on how you feel about alliteration. Lane Gray and Reid Roe. Rhys Roe is another option. Or combine it with another name from the list: Rhys Grant, Rhys Dean, Rhys Taft.

From my own list, I think Grant and Clark are my favorites.

If you decide not to do a pattern, I like Julian. Julian Lawrence; Lane Gray and Julian Roe.

Or Ian. Ian Lawrence. Lane Gray and Ian Roe. I like the way each boy has the same number of letters in his own first/middle set—unless that would make you feel trapped into repeating the same for each child. I just noticed that the initials would be IRL, so that would eliminate it for me—but I’m particularly picky about initials not spelling anything. IRL isn’t anything bad, and with textspeak there’s likely a meaning for almost any 3-letter combination.

I’d probably prefer Eamon, though. Eamon Lawrence. Lane Gray and Eamon Roe.

Or Nolan. Nolan Lawrence. Lane Gray and Nolan Roe. I like the way each boy’s name repeats its own strong vowel sound.

Foster. Foster Lawrence. Lane Gray and Foster Roe.

Miller Lawrence. Lane Gray and Miller Roe.

Avery Lawrence. Lane Gray and Avery Roe.

Or Cray? Cray sounds very much like Gray, so you’d have almost your Lane and Gray sibling set—but it’s not a duplicate name. Lane and Cray. Or Lane and Clay.

Or Lane and Grady. Hm, I like that. Lane Gray and Grady Roe. It’s very similar to Gray, yet without that “using the same name twice” sibling-politics problem.

Everett Lawrence. Lane Gray and Everett Roe. I like that a lot.