Deborah writes:
We’re due in February with our first kid and we just found out it’s a boy. My husband and I always said if we were having a boy we’d name it after his father who passed away some years ago. The name is Thomas and while I like it just fine, I’m not so keen on the nickname Tommy. We’ve also discussed choosing a name that pays homage to Thomas . A top contender right now is Theo (just Theo, not Theodore)
We plan to have a few kids and our last name is Bride with an Mc in front of it.
We’re also interested in a Spanish middle name to honor my Latino roots.
For Thomas, I liked
Thomas Emilio
Thomas Javier
Thomas JoaquinFor Theo, I find middle names trickier. Theo Javier sounds too “h” heavy. Theo Emilio or any other names ending in “o” are a obviously a no. I don’t like names that have an obvious English equivalent like Jaime or Miguel.
So two questions- one, what are some good name options other than Theo that would honor the name Thomas?
And two, what are some good Spanish middle names?Thank you!
If you use Thomas as a first name, I don’t think you’ll have much trouble with the nickname Tommy: it isn’t used much these days. The Thomas in my son Robert’s grade goes by Thomas, not Tommy or even Tom; the Elizabeth in his grade goes by Elizabeth, not Beth. The James in my son Edward’s class goes by James, not Jimmy. The Davids go by David, not Dave or Davey; the Michaels go by Michael, not Mike or Mikey. The default seems to be that children use their full names unless they tell you otherwise; most of the nicknames have a dated sound. As The Baby Name Wizard points out, the popular television show Thomas the Tank Engine further encourages the full form of the name.
Since you feel less than wildly enthusiastic the name, though, I suggest using it in the middle name position. This is a classic place for an honor name, and lets you use the name as-is rather than finding something similar. Assuming your father-in-law’s surname was also McBride, it even strengthens the namesake by giving your son his grandfather’s name with his own first name tacked onto the front: ______ Thomas McBride. It also gives you more freedom when choosing names for future children: you won’t have to try to coordinate with the style of the honor name, nor will you feel obligated to use any further honor names as first names.
The name Theo starts with a Th- like Thomas does, but the two names are unrelated. On top of that, the sound of the Th- isn’t the same, and there are no other sounds in common. For comparison, it’s a little like using the name Deanne to honor a Deborah: they share the first two letters plus a vowel, but that’s it. However, different families have different ways of doing things. If in your extended family it’s common for a namesake to share only the first letter of the name, for example, then Theo is an excellent namesake for a Thomas: it shares three letters and has a good visual similarity.
Since you’re using an honor name from your husband’s side of the family, I like the idea of using one from yours as well. Do you have any family members you’d like to honor? I tried pairing Theo with some names from the Latino section of The Baby Name Wizard or from the Spanish Names section of The Oxford Dictionary of First Names—but I don’t know how those names sound or feel, or what the associations are. I thought I could easily be recommending the equivalent of Theo Herbert, or Theo Owen, or Theo Clinton.
Or perhaps you could combine the two honors by using Tomas, the Spanish version of Thomas.
Name update! Deborah writes:
So sorry, I realized I never updated you. A bit late 4 and half months later but here ya go!
I was 3 weeks early and we still hadn’t decided upon a name when our baby made his grand entrance. After a complicated birth, we ended up in the hospital for a full week and still didn’t have a name until the night before we were discharged!
To be honest, I had completely forgotten I had written to you and so when my husband and I were discussing names in the hospital and getting nowhere, he decided to Google a few variations we were considering and came across your site with my question!
Your response and all the comments were so helpful. Thank you all so much.
Also, it was likely the pain meds but one of the commenters mentioning how she knew someone named Thomas whose name turned into Tuffy had me doubled-over in laughter (which was both funny and incredibly painful given that I had just given birth.)
Anyhow, after trying a few combinations out on our new son, we decided to go with Theo Joaquin. We explained to close family the connection for us with the name Thomas and it feels meaningful to us. And the name suits him to a T! :)
I totally agree with Swistle, I think Tommy isn’t very popular as a nickname these days. I don’t think you’ll have a problem with people calling him Thomas exclusively. Another strategy is to choose another nickname that you do prefer. I know a Thomas Jr. who his family started calling Tough Eddie (his middle name is Edward) which then morphed into Tuffy. It’s a fun nickname for their family to use.
Have you considered using Tomás (with or without the accent) as a way to bridge the two requirements? I actually prefer the Spanish pronunciation, Toh-MAS to Tom-ess. I knew a Thomas who went by Maz which I always thought was quite cool. I agree with Swistle that there’s a lot more flexibility on nicknames these days, and rarely does anyone assume that a child “goes” by anything other than what they’ve been introduced as. So if you like Thomas I wouldn’t be turned off by the possibility of Tommy.
For Spanish middle names, I have always liked Alejandro, Vicente, Julian, Javier, Eduardo, Hugo and Diego. With your last name, My very favourites would be:
Thomas Diego (Mc)Bride
Thomas Eduardo (Mc)Bride
Thomas Vicente (Mc)Bride
Best of luck :)
Oh, embarrassing! I totally missed your last line Swistle where you suggested using Tomas…that’s what I get for skimming before coffee! :/
I was also going to suggest Tomas before I saw swistle’s last line! I think it’s a fun way to combine the two! But yeah, I don’t know any little Tommys. Thomas is only two syllables, same as Tommy, so it’s not like it’s a shortened version of a long name. And just as an aside, I’ve considered Thomas for a son, but I actually think Tommy is darling and would want him to go by that!
Tomas is darling and would be perfect!
Another fan of Tomas! Tomas Joaquin is my favorite…possible nickname of TJ!
I think it’s wise to avoid a name you don’t like common nicknames for. I have two unrelated friends who wanted their sons to be called only Matthew and disliked the nickname Matt, and sure enough both started going by Matt in their early teens. I also know a woman whose Katherine wanted to be called Katie in middle school despite (and possible TO spite) her mom’s best efforts to keep her a Katherine forever. While it’s unlikely a teen will decide to go by Tommy, it’s very possible he’ll go by Tom.
I think a Thomas is likely to go by Tom once he gets older. If you don’t like the name Tom (or he could spell it Thom) then I’d use Tomas. Although, if he feels uncomfortable with the unusual name, he may revert to Tom anyway. You can’t really control what nickname your child chooses for himself.
Also: although Tommy sounds dated right now, it may not in 15 years (when he’s choosing his own nickname). So I don’t think it’s practical to say “no way he’ll go by that name!” He very well might.
I’d recommend using it as a middle name, if you really don’t like the nicknames. Emilio Thomas McBride sounds pretty awesome, and allows for the (more Americanized, on-trend) nickname Milo if he wants to use it. Emilio McBride. Milo McBride. I think it has a nice sound.
Good luck!
My Thomas is 2.5yo and when we picked the name, I worried about people calling him Tommy (which I don’t care for) but the only person who has called him that (and I gently corrected her) has children named Angela, Phillip and Steven and they all go by their commonly used nicknames, so I think it felt natural to her to shorten Thomas to Tommy … within the family, we often call him Tomo, an Eastern European variation of Thomas that a Croatian acquaintance told me about! I’m biased of course but it’s an awesome first name :) I like Joaquin as a middle name.
I agree that Thomas won’t automatically turn into Tommy. So Thomas or Tomás as a first or a middle are all workable options.
I know a couple of boys named Thomas who only go by the full name, never Tom or Tommy. I also know loads of other kids who only use the full name, I just don’t think nicknames are as automatic as they used to be.
I also thought of Tomas and like the idea that it would be a namesake that also honors your heritage. Kind of a twofer I think. You could also do another version of Thomas, like the Scottish Tavish.
I do like Theo, but agree it doesn’t seem like much of a namesake, unless your families commonly do first initial only namesakes I’m not sure a lot of people would get the connection. Perhaps something like Tomlin? If the first initial only thing does work for your family, perhaps you’d find it easier to find a middle name to go with something like Tobias, Timothy, Tanner or Thad. Or are there any Spanish language T names that you like?
I met a little boy at my son Teddy’s (nn for Theodore) playgroup whose name is Thomas Edward but goes by Ted. Do you like Thomas Eduardo?
Add another vote for Tomas. Like everyone else, apparently, I thought of it as soon as you mentioned your Latino heritage. Also, it seems much less likely to be shortened to Tommy. And, IMO, just sounds cooler than Thomas with the exotic flair, without being too weird or hard for people to understand.
Downside could be that, if you live in an area without a lot of diversity, people might just get confused and call him Thomas anyway.
IMO, Theo as an honor name for Thomas is really a stretch. Since Thomas is obviously of significance to your husband, and you say that you’ve both always said you would use it for a son, to me it’s only right to use the actual name Thomas…If I were your husband, I would feel disappointed to use Theo or anything else that was pretty far removed from Thomas. However, I do think the Spanish version of Thomas OR using it in the middle name spot would both be acceptable, depending on how your husband feels.
Personally, as someone with an honor name, I’m pretty sure I feel more connected to the aunt I’m named after because we actually have the same name, rather than if my parents had said “we wanted to name you after aunt Lois, but we liked Lisa better, so we named you that…but you’re named after her, really.”
I like Thomas Joaquin with the nickname TJ.
I vote for Emilio Thomas McBride. I love that suggestion.
I tend to agree that if you wish to honor your FIL, Theo is a stretch. But Theo Thomas McBride is also a nice option.
Such a cute photo – he definitely looks more like a Theo than a Thomas :)