Tricia writes:

I have recently realized that my husband and I have had a repeating problem with names. We have three children, Aidan (b. 1995), Ava (b. 1996), and Jasper (b. (2004). When Aidan was born, the name was number 461 on the SSA. My son has never met another Aidan in his life, and he has certainly never had to use his last initial in school. But my younger son started kindergarten this past year, and there were three Aidan’s in his class. And four Ava’s!! Four! (let me mention that when Ava was born, the name was number 2657 on the SSA. Nowhere near the top 1000. But now that I look, it is number 18!!!). Right now, Jasper is still in the 300s, but it has risen over 200 since my son’s birth, and I suspect it will continue to rise.

Anyway, the point of all that, is that I am due with my last child (a girl) on July 25th, and I am refusing to let that happen again. I know that my kids don’t necessarily have others with the same name in their classes at school, but as a whole, the names now sound very bland and ordinary, and we were going for the opposite when we named them. So I need your expertise in helping us find some alternate names that will not rise ridiculous amounts in popularity. To give you an idea, some names we like are Lucy, Maeve, Lydia, Violet, Juliet, Lila, Lea, and Rowan. Half of these names are already in the 100s on the SSA, and the others are a bit less popular, but not outrageously. What we are worried about is choosing Lea, which right now is number 671, and having it skyrocket so in the next few years, it becomes number 8 or something crazy like that.

We’re not sure how to approach this, because this has happened consistently with every name we’ve picked, so we don’t trust ourselves on our own to choose a name that this will not happen with. So we need your expertise, Swistle. Please help us to find a name similar to the kind of names I’ve listed (we aren’t really considering any of those names, too afraid of the popularity thing, but those are the kind of names we like). It frustrates me so much that Aidan and Ava, who’s names I used to get compliments on in the 90s, are the names of every other toddler in the US. I was at Barnes & Noble the other day looking at some pregnancy books, and I saw a baby name book called “Beyond Ava & Aiden”, for crying out loud! It made me so upset! Their names are now the staple for a common name, and I don’t want that to be the case with our newest addition.

Oh, and let me make sure I say, we don’t like unusual names… these, along with our kids names, are (were) all so-called “common names”, or so the public thinks. But we want the sort of names that are familiar to the ear but no so familiar that every parent will be choosing them. (even in the future)

Please help! I honestly don’t know what to do! I don’t trust myself with names anymore. (Oh and none of our kids have middle names – a family tradition – so that isn’t an issue, thank God.)

Thank you thank you thank you
Tricia

PS our last name starts with a C and is one syllable and fairly common.

Oh dear! Here is the trouble: you guys are natural trend frontrunners. I don’t know if there’s any way around this problem. My mom is the same: she liked the names Lucy and Owen back when my reaction to both names could be described as “WHAT??” If she’d used either of those names for a baby, I would have said she was COMPLETELY SAFE in not choosing a trendy name. And yet, look at them now! And now of course I love those names too, just like almost everyone else.

There’s no way to completely prevent choosing a name that will get very very popular, but sometimes there are indicators (and sometimes not). I’m looking at the charts and I think I have a different chart: I’m using the Social Security Administration baby names site, which says the name Ava was #739 in 1996, and was #5 in 2009; it had risen 200 places in the ten years before you chose it, which might have made us suspicious if we’d seen it, but there was no way to know it was going to go up SEVEN HUNDRED places in the next 10 years. The name Aidan, on the other hand, was #281 in 1995—but had gone up more than 600 places in the five years before that. So if you’d been looking at that chart, it would have been clear SOMETHING was up with that name. Jasper—probably no way to call that one: you named him a year before Twilight came out.

The main issue here, I think, is that the kind of names that get popular are the kind of names you LIKE. We can’t help our tastes in names, and you happen to be on the front edge of the crowd. You like Lea, which was #671 in 2009—but the spelling Leah was #28. And Lila! If you were LOOKING for the next big trendy hit, that’s what I would suggest for you. It’s gone from not even in the Top 1000 in 1997 to #168 in 2009. If I were going to make a prediction, I’d predict we’ll see Lila in the Top Ten within the next 5 years—or certainly within the next 10. And frankly, it’s perfect with your other kids’ names: Aidan, Ava, Jasper, and Lila is WONDERFUL.

And Lucy! Not rising quite as fast, but steadily: high 400s in the mid-’90s, low 200s in the early ’00s, and #101 last year. And again, WONDERFUL with your other kids’ names: Aidan, Ava, Jasper, and Lucy.

Lydia: gliding upwards gracefully. Juliet: upwards faster, in bigger leaps. Rowan: big leaps after total obscurity. Maeve: same as Rowan. Violet: same as Rowan and Maeve. I say you have a knack, and I say EMBRACE IT.

If you’d rather not embrace, we need to look in a completely different category. The names you like are the ones that sound fresh to the ears, little surprises as we hear names we haven’t heard used before—or not for a long time. It’s that “Whoa. WHOA.” reaction to a name that suddenly sounds….FRESH! Cadence, Braden, Caitlin, Noah, Isabella—these are all names that GRABBED ATTENTION and then LEAPED UP. Some of them were new inventions, some were revivals, but they all had that sudden rise from nearly nowhere. It’s because that same freshness hits nearly EVERYONE. All the names you like have that smack of freshness, or at least the lingering remains of it.

What you say you’d like is a common, non-unusual name that isn’t going to get wildly popular; in that case, you need to avoid that fresh sound. If you get the “Whoa. WHOA. THAT’S fresh and new!” reaction, STEP AWAY FROM THE NAME. You need a name that has lost that freshness, but without wilting: a great name, but familiar enough to be unlikely to ignite the sudden interest of large crowds. A name that at first seems a little…meh…just because it lacks that element of surprise, but then grows on you until you can’t believe you ever thought it was meh. Bethany. Bridget. Clarissa. Holly. Jocelyn. Kara. Laurel. Marissa. Meredith. Sabrina. Tessa. These are all from The Baby Name Wizard‘s list of “New Classics,” which she calls “trend-proof.” Or maybe “trend-resistant” would be a better term: it’s hard to know when some circumstance (an actor, a novel) will kick a name to the head of the line.

Best of luck, and I don’t think you’ll go wrong: you have marvelous and consistent taste that everyone loves! Choose what YOU love, and I don’t think you’ll be unhappy with the name—even if you’re unhappy with its popularity.

Name update 07-25-2010! Tricia writes:

Wow! Thank you so much for the advice and all the reader advice too! It gave us a lot of help.
Anyway, our baby girl was born last Saturday, healthy and beautiful, and we’re very happy with the name we chose.
Her name is Liza! (L-eye-zah, because I’ve seen Lee-za) Liza isn’t a name that’s even on the top 1000 (!!) but it feels simliar in style to names like Lila, don’t you think.
So Aidan, Ava, Jasper, and Liza. We really love it. What do you think?

Well, thanks so much!

Andrea writes:

I’m due in 9 weeks with boy/girl twins. We came up with our daughter’s name fairly easily – Lucia (pronounced Lou-c-uh) and we’ll call her Lucy for short) but cannot decide on a boys name to save our life! We have narrowed it down to the following 4. His middle name will be Robert (family name) and our last name is Woods. I’ll include some of my thoughts on each name. We like names that aren’t too poplar but not too out there either. Would love to hear your input and reader suggestions. Thanks!

Silas

We both like this name but whenever we share it with people we get “oh, well I like your girl’s name”. Is it just not very likeable? While we don’t care too much what others think we don’t want his sister to have a ‘good name’ and he has a bad name! We’d call him Sy for short. One issue I see is that since our name also ends in an S is that too hard in the plural – Silas’ Woods’ ?

Layton

Concerns with this name is that it is also a girl’s name, even though it would be spelled different Leighton Meister is the popular actress. I also don’t like how you lose the t when saying it fast – Lay’n and no good nicknames. I do like both Layton and Lucia starting with an L.

Bennett

I like this more than my husband. I know it’s rising in popularity. Would be concerned it automatically becomes Ben which is common.

Preston

My husband likes more than I do. It’s also a little to close to the 100 list for my taste. No good nicknames but I do like it sounds professional.

So

Silas & Lucia Woods?
Layton & Lucia Woods?
Bennett & Lucia Woods?
Preston & Lucia Woods?

THANKS!

I DO like Silas, but if you’re concerned about the double S endings, perhaps Simon? Simon Woods is so nice, and you still get Sy.

I agree with the problems with the name Layton you mention. Maybe Lachlan instead? Or Lawson? Or Lennon? Or Lennox? Or Lincoln? Or Linus? Or Lyle? I particularly like Lincoln’s nickname Linc: Linc and Lucy.

So my suggestions are:

Simon Robert Woods
Lincoln Robert Woods

And from your list my two favorites are:

Silas Robert Woods
Bennett Robert Woods

Name update 08-11-2010! Andrea writes:

hello! Just wanted to give a quick update our twins were born August 4th and we named them Silas Robert and Lucia Gail – they fit perfectly! Thanks to you and your readers.

Amy writes:

We are expecting a baby girl (our first child) due July 7. I thought we had settled on several possible names but the closer we get to the date, the more unsure we are. Our last name is 8 letters long and two syllables, starting with a hard K sound. Looking through name lists, we have tended to like long’ish feminine names (Alexandra, Evangeline, Madeline) with cute, spunky nicknames for when she is a little girl (Alex/Allie, Eva, Maddie). I definitely want a name that has a nickname. I want to use a name (either first or middle name) that has a meaning for me – whether a family name or tied to a beloved childhood book. I was named for a character in my mother’s favorite book (Little Women) and I always loved having that connection to her. For that reason, I love Madeline, one of my favorite books as a little girl. But, my husband does not like the nickname Maddie. We rejected Charlotte (nn Charlie – too popular in our area), Josephine (nn Josie – husband doesn’t like it), Gabriella (nn Ella – I’m afraid she will be called Gabby). My husband likes Hannah, but I’m stuck on there not really being a nickname for Hannah.

So, we thought about combining two – Alexandra Madeline, for example. But, combined with a two syllable last name (total of 9 syllables – and 25 letters total), is that too long? Are we saddling our little one with a little too much name?

One possible family name is Lilian, though my husband does not love it. We thought about Emerson (which doesn’t seem to go with our usual feminine names though) with a nickname of Emma (a family name) – but is it way too popular?

thank you for any suggestions you have…..

 
Emerson isn’t too popular, I don’t think, but Emma is the second most popular girl name in the United States (source: Social Security Administration). I’ve said before that I don’t think the Top Ten is the kiss of death, but if your goal is to avoid popular I’d stay away from Emma (and Addy and Maddy and Ella).

I can think of lots of long feminine names with cute nicknames (Francesca, Philippa, Willemina, Calliope, Penelope, Cassandra, Meredith, Raffaella, Philomena, Cordelia—but the trouble is, I won’t know if the name has meaning for you or not.

When you were a child, did you also love the book Madeline’s Rescue? If so, I suggest Genevieve with the nickname Evie (or Nevvie, or Genna, or Gennie). I think it’s wonderful with your surname. I like Genevieve Lilian K____, or you could use one of the problematic/rejected first names: Gabriella, Charlotte, etc. (If you use Gabriella, a cute nickname possibility is Gigi, from the initials G.G.)

If you considered Charlotte because of Charlotte’s Web, the name Fern would be a good middle name.

Another possibility is using another of the sister names from Little Women. You’ve already thought of Josephine, but perhaps Margaret? Margaret has so many great nicknames: Meg (the nickname used in Little Women), Maggie, Daisy (the nickname used for Meg’s little girl, also named Margaret), Greta. You could even use “Marmee,” which is what the mother in Little Women (ALSO named Margaret) goes by.

The fourth sister is Elizabeth, and we recently discussed a lot of good nicknames for that.

I don’t think a name like Alexandra Madeline is too long with a 2-syllable surname. I think it sounds very pretty and feminine.

If your husband likes the sound of the name Hannah but nicknames are a problem, you might be able to find a name he likes that starts with the similar-sounding Anna, and then use Annie as a nickname: Anastasia, Annabel, Anneliese, etc. Or perhaps a name that ends in -anna, to get the sound of Hannah but access some new nicknames up in front: Liliana, Luciana, Joanna, Susanna, Adrianna, Eliana, Georgianna, Lianna, etc.

Name update! Amy writes:

I was due to deliver on July 7, but as it turns out, our baby girl was born one week early on July 1. I was in the middle of contractions and waiting (impatiently!) for my husband to get home from work to bring me to the hospital. I checked the Swistle website as a way to distract myself, and was so surprised to see my question pop up that morning. It really helped get my mind off the contractions – what perfect timing! We ended up going with Alexandra Madeline (nickname Alli) – everyone loves her name and we think it suits her perfectly. Thank you and your readers for the great suggestions, and for confirming that our first choice wasn’t too long of a name for a little baby.

Marc writes:

Hi. We are expecting our first baby girl in July and we need some help with names. There are several names on our list that seem ok, but nothing is jumping out at us. When we named our little tan cockapoo puppy Karma, we knew it was perfect. Karma the cockapoo! But the baby names are much more difficult. My name is Marc Marasco and I am of Japanese and Italian descent. My wife’s name is Rebecca.

We want a name that is not too trendy, not to hipster or elitist and that can have a shorter nickname. We like Sophia and Mia, but every girl in California is Sophia or Mia or Bella. Names I like include: Katina, Fiona, Zoey, Michela, and Chloe. Names my wife likes include: Myla and Kaia. We both like Seneca because we both have connections to Cornell / Ithaca and it is both a native american and greek name — but it just doesn’t sound exactly right. Help!

I think probably Zoey/Zoe, Michela/Mikayla, and Chloe are all more popular than what you’re looking for; Myla and Kaia are much less common but have trendy sounds (various arrangements such as Kayla, Kyla, Kaylee, Lila, Lia, Maya, Mya, Mia, etc.) that make make them seem more common than they are. Katina and Fiona seem like good choices: not common, not hipster, not elitist. If you want something even more unusual, Ithaca would be a pretty name—the rhythm and end-sound of Jessica help keep it familiar and name-ish.

More possibilities: Anastasia, Annika, Bianca, Dalia, Phoebe, Sabrina, Samira, Sylvie.

Name update! Marc writes:

I can’t remember if I updated the Swistle site, but we went with the name Malia Aiko Marasco.  Thanks so much for the advice.

Shelly writes:

I love reading your suggestions for names, and would really appreciate any names you could think of for our first child, who is due July 11, 2010.

My husband and I very quickly decided on a boy’s name: Max Armando (Armando is my husband’s middle name and my father-in-law’s first name). But we’ve recently found out the baby is a girl, and we’re stumped.

Our last name is Terrazas (pronounced “tear-AS-is”, and is Spanish for terrace). We loved how Max went with the Spanish-sounding last name and seemed unique to us (but I’ve noticed it is quite high on the popularity lists).

My husband wants a cool-chick, strong, feminine and beautiful name. I want a name that is traditional, beautiful, feminine, with likable nicknames for when she is a baby/little girl, but is strong/professional sounding for when she gets older. I don’t want the name to be too popular or high on the usage lists, though.

My husband really loves Alexandra, but I dislike the nickname Alex for a little girl. I could live with Lexie, however. I’m just not super-in-love with it, though.

If we have boys in the future (we plan to have 1-2 more children after this one), their names will be Max Armando and Samual Warren, in respective birth order (all family names). But girls’ names have us stumped (none of the female names in either of our families are particularly appealing to me).

We like the idea of using family names, though, and because I’m so close to my father, whose first name is James (but he goes by his middle name), I was thinking of pairing James (or Jaimes) as our baby girl’s middle name. But if she’s called Alex James, I’m afraid she’ll get a complex that we gave her two masculine names.

Here are the names on our list, but none of them light my fire. The problem is, NOTHING has struck me as THE ONE in terms of a girl’s name. What is wrong with me? Am I expecting too much to have a lightening-bolt moment in terms of choosing a baby name, or is it normal to just choose a name that is “OK”?

Names Still On Our List
Alexandra (Lexie)
Audrey
Lilly
Irene / Irena
Morgan
Madeline

Names We’ve Discarded:
Emma
Samantha
Sophia
Brooke
Paige
Gabrielle
Rose
Olivia
Gretchen
Bridgett
Penelope
Julianne
Georgia
Charlotte
Scarlett

Thanks for any help you could give us!

To address your most important question first, YES it’s definitely normal to have nothing in particular stand out as THE NAME. Sometimes a name hits like a lightning bolt, sometimes it grows on you gradually, and sometimes you run out of time and just have to pick what seems like the best bet on the list.

Sometimes it helps to play games, like taking your list and seeing how you’d feel if each of those names was a baby in your arms, or how you’d feel if you knew the name was the one you were choosing, or how you’d feel if you knew the name was off the list. Or imagine each name in turn is the one, and then imagine someone saying, “What’s your baby’s name?” and giving the answer. Or handwrite each name with your surname a few times and see how that feels, or say each name with the two boy names you like and see which group sounds like YOUR group of children. Or each parent take turns crossing off a name from the long list until you get down to, say, the final three, and see how you each feel about those names. Or each parent put the name list in order, and see which names you both have high on the list. The point of the games is to try to get opinions to surface and solidify.

Would you like the name Alexandra better with the nickname Ally? Or you could go with a variation such as Alissandra and use Liss/Lissie.

I think all your name choices are good ones. They all go well with your surname and with the two possible future boy names. Let’s see if we can make a list of more possibilities to consider.

Anastasia (Anna, Annie, Stace)
Cassandra (Cass, Cassie)
Francesca (Frankie, Chess)
Emeline (Emmie)
Geneva (Gennie, Eva, Evie)
Genevieve (Gennie, Evie)
Josephine (Jo, Josie)
Karenna (Karie, Rennie)
Lissandra (Liss, Lissy)
Meredith (Merrie)
Philomena (Phillie, Mena)
Veronica (Ronnie, Nicki)
Willemina/Wilhelmina (Willa, Mina, Minnie)
Winifred (Winnie, Freddie)

I had Georgia (Georgie, Gigi) and Penelope (Penny, Nellie) on there too until I saw they were on the discard list. I like both of them a lot. I think my favorite is Francesca, because I think it’s beautiful and feminine and strong and unusual, and also cool-chick with cool nicknames.

Name update! Shelly writes:

We ended up naming our baby girl Alexandra Rose Terrazas, and we call her Lexie. The middle name was a last minute call, as I thought of Rose when the doctor in the delivery room exclaimed that she was born very pink and rosey.

Thanks so much for your name suggestions, my husband and I really appreciate it!

Jen writes:

our second daughter, quinn, is scheduled to arrive 7/7 and we still need a middle name for her. both our girls will have androgynous first names (she’ll be little sister to deven) with more feminine middle names so that, if they end up hating the first, they’ll have an option.

SO, middle name needs to be stand-alone as a feminine name – and by stand-alone, i mean a less unusual choice…deven’s middle name is elise.

the other complicating factor is that we have a long last name – something that sounds like micon (hyphen) bonner – and so we think the middle name shouldn’t be more than 3 syllables…but not a monosyllable because it kind of clunks after quinn.

i could be persuaded to go longer for a name i really love but anything beyond 3 syllables starts sounding very princess-y to me. (alexandria, gabriela, etc)

lastly, while we love quinn as a first name – and love deven & quinn as sibling names – quinn starts sounding like “queen” when paired with certain middle names, like elizabeth.

the other officially vetoed names have been sophia, caroline, mirabelle, corinne and madeline.

we sort of like these names but none sound like The Name…

gabrielle – too princess?
kathleen – too dated? (plus a friend’s name)
caprice – not stand-alone enough?
therese – too plain to be a first name option?
olivia – too popular? (plus, a family members middle name)

(sidenote: olivia is deven’s middle name suggestion.)

we also want to stay away from family names since deven doesn’t have one…that rules out:

alice
danielle
justine
elena
eleanor
margaret
linda
stephanie
pamela
alexis
ariana
carole
elizabeth
jessica
holly
angela
erin
shannon
nora
katherine

good grief, we’re picky.
help?

Since Deven and Quinn are such perfectly-coordinated sibling names, one exercise we could try is coordinating the middle names just as if they were the first names. That is, we could play the game “Sister Names for Elise,” and see if it yields any names that fit the bill for the actual situation.

The Baby Name Wizard suggests these sister names for Elise: Camille, Elena, Hope, Celeste, and Noelle. And right off the bat we have a definite possibility in Camille: it sounds similar to Caprice but is more common and standalone; it’s two syllables; it sounds great with Quinn; it sounds great with your surname. Quinn Camille Micon (hyphen) Bonnor. Devan Elise and Quinn Camille. I feel tempted to pressure you into using this, so let’s move on to finding some more options.

Quinn Adele
Quinn Audrey
Quinn Beatrix
Quinn Bethany
Quinn Bridget
Quinn Camille
Quinn Cassidy
Quinn Charlotte
Quinn Clarisse
Quinn Claudia
Quinn Estelle
Quinn Felicity
Quinn Frances
Quinn Giselle
Quinn Joanne
Quinn Joelle
Quinn Juliet
Quinn Lucy
Quinn Miranda
Quinn Ruby
Quinn Penelope
Quinn Shelby
Quinn Simone
Quinn Stella
Quinn Sylvia
Quinn Willow
Quinn Winifred

Quinn Felicity and Quinn Penelope both exceed the ideal syllable count, but I love both of them so much. I wanted to start this next sentence “Other favorites are:” and make a list, but I like too many of them. Quinn Miranda stands out to me, though.

Name update! Jen writes:

we ended up going with juliet, thanks to some input we got from this post – thank you!

Jenna writes:

We are adopting a baby, but we don’t have a due date… yet. It could be anywhere from next week to February. Not so helpful, huh?
Our last name rhymes with “fire”.
We have a daughter whose name is ‘Holiday Phoenix’ (most people call her ‘Holly’, but she is wildly proud of all her name). To us, it is the perfect girl name… unusual, happy, and has a nature-y (and tame) nickname.
For boys, we like ‘Daryle’, ‘Gus’, ‘Samuel’ (the only case of an open adoption in the Bible except for Moses, and ‘Moses’ isn’t an option), and ‘Oscar’ (not a possibility, though, with the whole ‘Fire’ aspect). For the most part, my husband likes men’s names that don’t have nicknames (‘Sam’ is the obvious exception). The only two boy middle names we’ll consider are ‘Holmes’ (family name) and ‘Dean’ (family name). And we aren’t fans of boy names that begin with the letter ‘B’. (We don’t want ‘Dean’ for a first name because we’ve recently known it as a girl’s name).
For girls, we like the name ‘Serenity’ (‘Wren’ for a nickname). We’ve recently discarded ‘Liberty’ (‘Libby’ for short) because we found out that there’s already one at our daughter’s school—and my father-in-law had a very difficult time with a Libby. A good friend just had a baby girl named ‘Story’ (which we both adore… especially with the nickname ‘Rhee’). Middle names for a girl are ‘Valentine’ and ‘June’ (both have a sweet tale behind them). For a long time, ‘Valentine’ was a nice first name choice (with ‘Valley’ for a short name), but ‘Val’ is unappealing to us. We’re all about the full name/nickname combo with a girl.
Thank you SO MUCH for your help.

 
If it doesn’t have to be a BIBLICAL adoption (and if it does, you could add Jesus to that list), I found a list of famous adoptions. The trouble is that most of the names are either common names you’ll likely have already considered (David or Thomas for Dave Thomas, founder of Wendy’s and of an adoption foundation; Alexander for Alexander the Great; Charles for Charles Dickins; Steven for Steve Jobs; James for James Michner; John for John Audubon) or quite unusual (Michner for James Michner; Audubon for John Audubon)—and it’s a lonnnnng list. I think you’d just have to look through it and see if anything caught your eye.

If you like Oscar but want to avoid hot dog advertising jingles, I wonder if you’d like the name Otto? It’s unusual, it’s a palindrome, it’s nicknameless. Unless your surname sounds like Buyer, in which case I wonder if Otto Buyer sounds like someone shopping for a car.

If you like Gus and Sam, I wonder if you’d like Wade? Cal? Beck? Mack?

All right, enough talk about boy names, let’s tackle the girl name. Ideally we need a noun name with a mainstream nickname.

A name I wouldn’t have expected to like but DO like is Epiphany. I first-and-only encountered it in a book by Haven Kimmel called The Solace of Leaving Early. By the end of the book I was thinking, “You know, actually that is a BEAUTIFUL name.” Its meaning is excellent: a sudden insight or enlightenment, with connotations of it being a positive experience. It has a name-like sound, similar to names such as Stephanie. The “mainstream nickname” part is where we get stuck. Eppie? Pip?

Gossamer would be a pretty name, but again there’s a nickname problem. Gussie? Sammie?

Poetry, but for a nickname? Ack. Stuck. Poe?

Fidelity: so name-like, but no good nickname! Fifi? Della?

Memory, same problem. Nightingale, same problem. Finally, same problem. Morning, same problem.

A less-used month name such as January, September, or December would be nice, but yet again: no good nicknames.

My 5-year-old Elizabeth says the best girl name in the whole world is Windiest. Winnie would be a cute nickname.

Allegro (a musical term that means to play it all perky and lively), with the nickname Ally.

Maybe Serendipity, with the nickname Sera/Sara?

Minuet (Minnie).

Aviary (Ava).

Celestial (Celeste).

Ability (Abby).

Magnolia (Maggie).

Calico (Callie).

Serenade (Sera).

The more I look for names, the more I feel the perfection of the name Holiday. How did you find it? Do the same thing again, because you have a knack!

Here are my top choices:

• Epiphany June or Epiphany Valentine, with the nickname Pip or Pippi
• Minuet Valentine, with the nickname Minnie
• Serenade Valentine, with the nickname Sera

Name update! Jenna writes:

Our son was born last week! His whole adoption story happened in the month of August, so we were this close to naming him August and just calling him Gus (thanks to the poster who suggested it!). But when we realized that August was a ‘dual gender’ name, we decided to cut to the chase and go with the nickname as his official name. So Gus Holmes “Fire” is the newest addition to our family. Thanks, Swistle!

Anna writes:

I hope that I can enlist your help and your reader’s help in naming my husband Eric and my first child who is a boy! It seems like we had a solid list of 5 names picked if the baby were a girl, but we only have 4 names for a boy now and we aren’t sold on any of them yet. Our last name is Milot – pronounced Me-Low.

The boys names that we agree on are Jack, Grant, Graham and Callum. Our problem – Jack is too popular (we wanted to use Jack because that is my late grandfather’s name.) I LOVE Callum, but my husband doesn’t like the nickname Cal. Grant is ok in our book, and we like Graham, but call my grandmother “Gram.” Talk about confusing!

We also liked Camden and Tyler but family and friends have named their children those names. Some names we are on the fence about are Cohen and Coleman (but we like to camp and think it would be strange to call our child what we call our stove…)

We would like to use Joseph as the middle name because that is Eric’s middle name, but I would still like to honor my grandfather, so Jack or Brennan (his surname) would also work.

My husband and I are both graphic designers so we feel like it would not be fitting to give our child an ordinary name. We are not into classic names (besides Jack I guess.) We don’t want anything that is too popular so he won’t grow up being one of 5 with the same name in his class. We also don’t like super trendy names (Jayden, Aiden, etc.)

If it helps we liked all unisex names for a girl. So, if we end up ever having a girl we wouldn’t want people trying to figure out which one of our children is a boy, so the name should be somewhat masculine.

We hope you can help!

I wonder if you might want to use your grandfather’s surname Brennan as the first name? Or perhaps hold that in reserve for a future girl, if you like androgynous names for girls. It’s so lucky to have a family surname that would make a wonderful first name! I have a lot of Dutch ancestors so have surname-as-first-name choices such as VanderWyk. Catchy!

I see your point about Graham/Gram, but it’s not likely to be a long-term problem, if you catch my tactless drift.

If you like Coleman, I wonder if you might like Chapman? Or Truman?

Another possibility is Lawson. It’s unusual and masculine, and I really like it with your surname: Lawson Milot.

Wilson is good, too: Wilson Milot.

And Gibson: Gibson Milot.

Sullivan is a name I think is underused: Sullivan Milot.

I wish Ruben sounded good with my surname, but sadly no. It’s good with yours: Ruben Milot.

If you like Tyler, maybe Tanner? Oh, or Turner! I really like Turner: Turner Milot.

If you like Camden, maybe Keegan? That’s high on my own boy name list. Or Corbin? Or Campbell?

If you like Jack, maybe Clark? Ike? Mack?

Name update 07-12-2010! Anna writes:

I just wanted to give an update for Baby Boy Milot. He decided to arrive a little early on 6/27. After taking our list of names and looking at our little man, we decided on Graham Joseph. Thanks to you and all of your followers comments, we felt it was a great fit. We have gotten many compliments on it and how strong a name it is.
Thanks for all of your help!

Farrell writes:

My cousin is pregnant with a boy and due in July. She is overwhelmed a bit with everything, as she is single and this was a surprise. She also had no idea how difficult it would be to find a name!

My cousin likes traditional names but not names that are too common. She does like somewhat unique names, as long as they are not “off the wall.” Her sister has a baby named Daniel, so that is out. Four names that she has come across so far that she likes are:

* Brendan
* Terrance
* Nathaniel
* Ian

My cousin definitely wants to use the middle name Michael (after her father). This is her first child. The other complicated factor is that my cousin is not sure which last name the baby will have – hers or the father’s. Hers rhymes with “Wiley” and his with “Keen.”
So it will either be Baby ____ Michael Wiley or Baby ____ Michael Keen.

Thanks!!

Oh, I do like the name Terrance! I have a highly positive association I mentioned a few posts ago, with the nice boy in my elementary school who didn’t try to step on the girls’ toes during square dancing. And it goes well with both surname possibilities.

My own favorite name on the list is Ian, but only with the surname that sounds like Wiley. If she ends up using Keen, the name Evan is similar to Ian but might sound better with it (depending on what the surname actually is).

And I think Nathaniel and Brendan are both great names too, so I’m hesitant to complicate things by adding to her list! And yet that is what I do, and so onward!

I like Wesley if the surname is Keen, though not if it’s Wiley. Wesley Michael Keen.

I like Gideon either way, though more if it’s Wiley: Gideon Michael Wiley, Gideon Michael Keen.

I like Elliot either way: Elliot Michael Wiley, Elliot Michael Keen.

I like Sebastian either way: Sebastian Michael Wiley, Sebastian Michael Keen.

I like Edmund with Wiley, but it’s a little hard to say with Keen: Edmund Michael Wiley, Edmund Michael Keen.

I like Phillip either way: Phillip Michael Wiley, Phillip Michael Keen.

I like Jonathan either way: Jonathan Michael Wiley, Jonathan Michael Keen.

I like Simon either way, though I’m less sure about Simon Wiley (too much long-I sound?): Simon Michael Keen, Simon Michael Wiley.

Name update 07-10-2010! Farrell writes:

Brendan Michael Keen was born on June 26, 2010. Baby and Mommy are doing well:) He is a big boy and is healthy…I am still waiting for my cousin to send me a picture!!!

Laura writes:

I hope that you and your intrepid readers may have some input and suggestions for my husband and me. We are expecting our first child, a girl, on June 27. We decided not to discuss her name with any family or friends, but sometimes feel like we’re going in circles, since it’s just the two of us thinking about this.

If we could name her anything, we would probably name her Katherine. We both love this name, plus it is my maternal grandmother’s name. Unfortunately, however, our only niece is already Catherine, so it’s out.

Our leading contender (for months now) is Margaret. Margaret was my great-grandmother (Katherine’s mother), and was also my husband’s paternal grandmother. One of the things we like about Margaret, independent of any family history (a family tie isn’t a must for us), are the nicknames. We love the nickname Maisie, and also like Maggie. I can imagine a little girl and a woman with these names, plus she can use her full name if she wants something with less whimsy as she gets older. My reservations are: one, that I like, but don’t love, the sound of the name Margaret; and two, that I am worried that Maisie may become too popular, although I don’t yet know any actual children with this name. For what it’s worth, we live in San Francisco.

Other names I like include: Hannah (my husband is not wild about Hannah and thinks it is too popular), Elizabeth (but I have at least three friends with daughters named Elizabeth, nn Ellie x2, Libby – too common), and Fiona (my husband tends to think this is too proper, or something).

Her middle name will be Audrey, for my husband’s mother who recently died. Audrey is not an option for the first name, not because we don’t like it, but because my husband’s mother never liked her own name. Our last name is Brown.

Thank you!

I’ll start by getting two small things out of the way. The first being that even if your mother-in-law didn’t like her name, you can still use it in the first-name slot. If she were still alive I’d agree not to use it as the first name because I’d wonder if she might even cringe a little to hear her own disliked name on a granddaughter, and of course you’d want to honor not only her but also her dislike of her name. But because she’s NOT alive, the name is in her honor alone and you can use it as the first name if you like it. Well, unless she made you promise not to or something. It’s a beautiful name.

And the second thing being that I think two cousins with the same name is sweet—even if the families are close and spend a lot of time together—and I think it leads to cute inter-family nicknames (such as calling one girl “See Catherine” and the other “Kay Katherine,” which then gets shortened to Cee-cee and Kay or WHATEVER). I think it’s significantly less confusing than father/son naming where the mail and phone calls and records get mixed up. But I know/understand a lot of people would prefer not to duplicate names, so I’m just noting this before moving on.

Taking those two things together, my first suggestion is Audrey Katherine Brown. Do you like how I just dismissed THREE of your specifications (that Audrey be the middle name; that Audrey not be the first name; that Katherine not be used) to come up with that? Probably next I will be giving you boy name suggestions and changing your surname!

I think the name Margaret is such a great and flexible name: old and traditional and dignified, a can’t-be-wrong classic, but with some of the cutest nicknames EVER. Greta, Maisie, Meg, Maggie, Daisy! My primary worry with the nickname Maisie is the popular children’s book/television character Maisy Mouse. Maisy Mouse removed the name from my consideration list just as thoroughly as another mouse removed the name Mickey. It’s a positive association, but such a STRONG one. Definitely it’s not a universal deal-breaker, but it’s the kind of thing I like to think about beforehand when I’m considering a name.

As a childhood Little Women enthusiast, I’m leaning toward suggesting you use Daisy. [Edit for clarity: I mean Meg’s daughter, also named Margaret, whom they called Daisy. Amusing: I didn’t even think of Margaret/Meg herself. Hee!] (Plus, if it were my daughter I would then love love LOVE to buy her things that had daisies on them, like outfits and room decor and so forth.) As a childhood A Wrinkle in Time enthusiast, I’m leaning toward suggesting you use Meg. (I was especially charmed by the way her dad called her Megawatt.) Well, probably if you choose Margaret, one nickname or another will emerge as most RIGHT for her once she’s born.

Hannah and Elizabeth do both seem too common with a common surname. I love the name Fiona; I think it sounds British, but in a sassy as well as proper way. A name that has a similar sound while being more in the Hannah/Elizabeth category is Felicity. Felicity Brown is wonderful. If you like nicknames, there’s Fliss and Lissy and Flip. Two downsides: Felicity Audrey doesn’t flow as well as it could, and also she’d have initials that spell FAB (it’s a positive word, but I mention it in case you don’t like initials that spell things).

Another name I like for you is Beatrix. I don’t generally like first/last name alliteration so I don’t know why this one appeals, but it just DOES: Beatrix Audrey Brown. Nicknames: Bea, Bee, Trixie. I’ve heard people say Trixie has hooker/stripper associations for them, but doesn’t it seem too cute and sweet for a hooker or stripper? It lacks the SULTRINESS I would expect. It sounds to me more like a sweet little fairy, like Tinkerbell. Also, pardon my bringing this up in polite company, but how many of us are firsthand familiar with common names for hookers and strippers? (And if any of you are, would you make me a chart? Because that would be super-useful info! It’s the only section I can think of that’s missing from The Baby Name Wizard.)

So! To sum up! If I were you I would first run it by my niece’s parents to make sure it wouldn’t upset them, and then I’d use Katherine Audrey Brown: it’s the name you both like best. Second choice Audrey Katherine Brown, given that your mother-in-law is no longer on the scene to dislike the sound of her own name, and everyone else likes it. Third choice Margaret Audrey Brown, with a wait-and-see on the nickname. Next choice, Felicity Audrey Brown, which I love even though it’s not as smooth with the middle name as would be ideal. Next after that, Beatrix Audrey Brown, which I think has sass as well as adorableness (I would use Bee as the nickname).

What do the rest of you think? Lots of fun things to have opinions on in this one!

Name update 08-02-2010! Laura writes:

I am happy to announce the birth of our daughter, Margaret Audrey, on June 21. I loved your and your readers’ comments and suggestions (yes, even the sidebar stemming from Trixie!). After she was born, Margaret just seemed “right” and I think we call her Margaret a little more often than Maisy. My reservations about the name are gone.

Our new quandary is how to spell Maisy. I had thought Maisie, but in practice we have found it easiest to explain “like Daisy, but with an M” to those unfamiliar with the name. Saying “like Daisy, but with an M and an IE on the end” just seems silly. We’ll see… For now, our daughter’s nickname shares a spelling with that nice little mouse!

Many thanks again!