Hello Swistle, long time reader, first time emailer. My name is Melanie, and my last name sounds like Smiles.
Honestly, I never expected to be emailing you because I’ve always had a long list of names at the ready, and my husband’s style is similar to mine. We had no issues naming our first. She is Hunter Lorna. Her MN is in honor of my beloved grandmother.
When we found out I was pregnant for the second time, I was hoping for a boy, who would be Paxton Lucas (MN in honor of my brother). Well, we were shocked to learn that I will be having TWO boys. The first will indeed be Paxton Lucas, and we are 99% decided on Camden for the second. We like that Paxton and Camden kind of match but aren’t too matchy (both two syllables, both end with N, both have a one syllable nickname, neither are overly popular). However, I am having trouble with Camden’s MN.
The issue is that I have no more honor names left to use. I felt very, very strongly about honoring my grandmother and brother, but the only other family member I would consider honoring is my father. And frankly, I just don’t like his names (Carl and Walter) enough to use them. My husband Max is not close with his family, so he does not want to use any of their names. (You will be tickled to know that not only did he take my surname, but it was his suggestion to do so!) Also, we do not want to use any of our own names as honor names. I know you often advocate for that, but it’s just not for us.
I do not want Camden to be the only child in the family without an honor MN. The only other person I am considering for this is my friend Morgan. Here are my questions about this.
1. Is it strange to honor someone who is “just” a friend? She is like a sister to me, and we’ve been friends since Kindergarten, if that helps.
2. Is that too many Ms and Ns? caMdeN MorgaN.
3. Does it immediately invoke Captain Morgan?
As you can probably tell, our style runs more contemporary/surnames/below the top 100. Here are some other names on our boys list, just for reference. (None of these are honor names.)
Denver
Maddox (too similar to Max)
Brighton
Belmont
River
Rowan
Ronan
Rohan
Finn
Barrett
Calahan
Thatcher
Cohen
Skylar
Soren
Quinn
Avery
Bailey
Mackenzie (too similar to Max)
London
Payton (too similar to Paxton)
Aspen (too similar to Paxton)
Harbor (saw this on your post about naming a boy Harper!)This will be my last pregnancy. (We had planned on two total, so three will certainly be enough!) If one of the twins is a surprise girl, her first name will be either Fallon, Sierra, or Winter. We would have the same MN issue.
Oh, and lastly, we want to stick with two syllables to match Hunter, Lorna, Paxton, and Lucas, but that’s not a dealbreaker.
Am I overthinking this? Is Camden Morgan fine? Should I forget about the honor MN altogether and just pick something from the list above? Or should I switch out the first name to something that flows better with Morgan?
Thank you!
Melanie
I think it is a delightful idea to use Morgan after a friend you’ve had since kindergarten and think of as a sister! One of my children has a middle name after a friend, and I worried it would seem weird since the others have family honor names—but with time, it does not seem weird. Everyone has a naming story, and that seems to matter more than what specific type of honor name each person got.
If Camden Morgan seems a little full of M and N, or too evocative of Captain Morgan, you could swap the middles: Paxton Morgan and Camden Lucas. One thing I like about this idea is that it makes it seem less as if one twin got your Ideal First-Choice Name and the other got runners-up for both first and middle.
But if you don’t want to swap the middle names, I wouldn’t advise choosing a different first name just to get a better flow/sound with the middle. In my experience, the flow/sound of the full name is satisfying during the naming process, and after that it just disappears until high school graduation, when they say it so slowly the flow doesn’t matter anyway.
I would also like to put in a vote for the name Carl. I think it’s a terrific, warm, gentle name that would grow on you with time. Camden Carl is pretty cute, and fun to say! Or I like Paxton Carl and Camden Lucas. I think the name Walter, too, is in the very early stages of a comeback, and will soon sound better to you than it does now. I used my grandfather’s name as one child’s middle, even though I actively disliked my grandfather’s name—and now I no longer dislike it: not only have I come around to it, but if anything I love it more for being a name I only wanted to use for the honor and not for the name itself.
Oh, one final idea: you could use Lucas for both boys. Paxton Lucas and Camden Lucas. I have heard of a fair number of families where all the girls are given the same middle name, which is what made me think of it. Plus, I love fun twin-name stuff.
If you are open to swapping out Camden completely, I love the idea of Paxton and Lucas as first names would be so cute. Paxton Morgan and Lucas Camden maybe?
Not sure how old your daughter is, but perhaps she could choose a middle name for Camden? That would be a fun naming story, which still has ties to family.
Or, you could give Camden a ‘W’ middle name, so he has the same initials as your dad!
Ooh a W middle for Camden would be an awesome honor for Carl Walter! Maybe Camden Wesley?
I also think that Camden Carl is delightful. But I want you to use Morgan! Not only is it a nice story to tell, it also shares a letter with both mom and dad’s names – I know you don’t want to honour yourselves, but it’s a cute secondary tie-in.
I don’t think it’s strange to use a friend’s name for an honor name. I also like the idea of the middle name switch. I think Carl and Walter are usable as well.
Are there any honor names from your relationship you could use? Town you met in? First date place? Street name? I think that would be a cool honor name on par with a family member.
If not, I think Morgan is great!
I would think of places or things of significance to you that aren’t necessarily people. Alma mater, favorite destination, author, musician you love, wedding venue…
That said, i like the idea of Paxton Carl and Camden Lucas. It feels less like “oh we didn’t plan for you so scraped together your name” for twin b.
I really like Paxton Morgan and Camden Lucas. Also, I doubt it’ll be a big deal for Camden to be Camden Morgan.. Now if Morgan were your surname, that’d be different. BTW, my gramma and an aunt on either side were named after good friends of their parents, so obv it seems totally normal to me
Also voting for Sierra Morgan if you need a girl’s name. :)
Have you thought about a longer version of Carl, like Carlisle or Carlos?
Maybe Carden? (Carlin would be great, but it feels very associated with George Carlin to me.
Or Charles?
(I like Morgan too. I don’t think it’s weird to choose to honor a good friend. There is a tiny part of me that wonders if either of your parents are the types to have hurt feelings about such things, and if in that situation, it might be better to go all in on making the name an aesthetic rather than a sentimental choice.)
Our son’s middle name is an honor name for our mutual best friend, but her name is distinctively feminine so instead of using her name, we asked her for suggestions for the middle name and she came up with a great one. If you like your friend’s naming taste, that could be one way to go.
I like the friend’s name and both of your father’s names, so you seem to have an abundance of options. If you still feel like it is wrong, maybe choosing a name that shares part of you and your hubby’s story:
– City or State where you first met
– something that reminds you of the proposal
– street name of your first house
– band name of your 1st dance at your wedding
All of these things read a bit of being traditional (who knows if you had a 1st dance or if the proposal was somewhere other than over pancakes in your kitchen), but it could get the juices running.
3 days later and I’m still giggling over the options for my spouse and me. Lets just say Connecticut, IRS Training, and Detroit would _not_ work for us.
I can see lots of nice options for other people, though. :)
Iris would be perfect for you :)
For me, Camden Morgan would be a no-go because of how much it sounds like Captain Morgan. I love the idea of switching the middle names of Babies 1 and 2. Eliminates the Captain Morgan sound and gives both babies one of your original first choices.
All that being said, “problems” with first and middle name flow are really not a big deal in life. As an adult, most of my friends probably don’t even know my middle name. It came up a bunch in school, but not after that.
I think in your position I would want to make your father’s name work somehow. I like Tee’s suggestion of a middle name starting with W so the initials match! I also agree with the various people who thought it’s worth considering using Camden Lucas and finding a new middle for Paxton. Paxton Carl, or maybe get creative with Carl + Walter = something like Calder (do you like the artist?)
When I was choosing a middle name for my second baby, I had a relative I wanted to honor, but I didn’t love their name. I spent weeks brainstorming creative alternatives. It wasn’t until I was filling out the birth certificate that I finally gave up on compromises and just used the not-perfect name. At this point, I am so happy I did. I find it very meaningful to tell both my kids stories from the past about the people we honored with their names. Turns out, for me, the meaning of the middle name outweighs the sound/style issues.
What about Carter as a derivative of Carl plus Walter?
I was thinking the same! Carter is great, either Camden Carter, or use Carter as the first name and he can be Carter Morgan. Or Morgan Carter. Paxton and Carter, Paxton and Morgan.
One middle name I’ve thought about to honor my dad (a fellow Carl) is Carlo (like Arlo with a C). It’s too different for me to like it for a first name but it sounds fun and spunky enough to be a cool middle name that modernizes Carl.
I vote for Maddox precisely bc it is similar to Max but just different enough that it won’t feel like you are honoring the dad’s name. I have a friend with kid named Maddox (and her other kid is named one of your other names!) and love it. Camden Maddox.
I think the middle names suggestion of using Carl, Carlisle, and Charles are great ideas. Carter works well here as well. If we like the initial idea I think Walker
Paxton Carlisle
Camden Lucas
Paxton. Lucas
Camden Charles
Paxton Lucas
Camden Walker
I love the idea of swapping middles! Paxton Morgan and Camden Lucas sound amazing!
If you have a suprise girl, I love the sound of Winter Morgan (but is it too similar to Hunter?)