Hi Swistle
We are expecting our (very surprise!) third baby.
Our first child, a girl, is Ev@ Rrruth (without the extra letters). Rrruth is a family middle name. She kind of named herself even before conception!
Our second child, a boy, is Blyth3 Reub3n. We settled on Blyth3 on our second day in hospital after finding our almost-sure-but-not-quite choice, Alistair, just didn’t fit – and neither did our second almost-maybe-possibly choice, Toby. Blyth3 had positive associations for me, being a fan of Anne of Green Gables; and it has come to fit him so beautifully, despite the funny looks we occasionally get: He’s quirky, cheerful, and delightfully cuddly and affectionate!
Our choices for a third girl are fairly well settled: either M@e Ruby (my first pick) or S@brina Ruby (my husband’s top favourite, and my third favourite). My only qualm about M@e (though I ADORE it!) is that I specifically want that spelling, but I suspect I’m going to subject her to a lifetime of “M@e with an ‘e’, not a ‘y’” fun! What do you think?
For a boy, it’s tricky. Here’s why:
– We really want to stick with the R middle name convention, due to a multitude of R family names across the board. But, we want to find one that isn’t too modern compared with our more classic name choices – e.g. Ryan; and not too stuffy – e.g. Richard). We have the names Robert, Roy and Ronald in the family – but I feel very “meh” about them, as I feel they sort of slide toward that stuffy category. Perhaps Ronald not quite so much as the other two, but still. I feel stuck for good options!
– Despite bending our idea a little with S@brina as a contender for a girl, I think it would be nice to aim for a one or two syllable name, if possible, to tie in with her siblings’ names. This isn’t a dealbreaker though.
– I quite like the name D@rcy, for a boy, but I can’t decide if it would be cute or ridiculous to have a Blyth3 AND a D@rcy (yes, I’m a fan of both Anne of Green Gables and Pride & Prejudice!)
Swistle, I’m hoping you can help unravel my thinking and come up with some brilliant ideas to solve my baby name jigsaw puzzle!
I think the name May/M@e is widly understood to have two spellings, and that whichever spelling you use, you/she will need to clarify the spelling each time. As a Kristen who has to clarify that it’s a K not a C and an E not an I, I can report that this feels very normal, and does not feel like a reason to avoid a name: MANY names have multiple spellings. Even better: the name is so short, it’s a quick and easy clarification: “M@e, that’s M-A-E.”
For an R- middle name for a boy, I suggest not worrying about coordinating the style with the other children’s middle names: that feels like an issue that matters only during the naming process, if then, and then never again. But here are a few more options: Robin, Raphael, Roland, Roderick, Rufus, Rupert, Reid, Randell, Russell, Raymond, Rhys, Redford, Richmond, Rowan.
I think the name D@rcy is a terrific idea. I like the literary tie-in (they’re even both literary surnames!), and I like the coordinating usage: in the United States, the name Blyth3 is unisex used more often for girls (87 new baby girls and 10 new baby boys given the name in 2020), and so is the name D@rcy (194 new baby girls and 9 new baby boys given the name in 2020)—and yet BOTH namesakes are male characters. Very pleasing. Ev@, Blyth3, and D@rcy.
Without a surname to work with, it’s hard to make additional suggestions—but I don’t even feel the urge to make additional suggestions. I think M@e/D@rcy are great.
I’m a fan of both of those books, also, but if I met a little Blythe, I would never connect it with the Anne books. (Now if it was Gilbert, that would be different). Darcy seems to go perfectly with Blythe and I especially like Darcy Rupert for you since your other kiddos have middle names the begin with the “rue-” sound. Rupert is also distinguished and classic.
As someone named Jennifer during the height of the Jennifers, I can assure you that you always have to spell your name even if you are named Jennifer. So I wouldn’t worry about spelling issues between two common known spellings.
As a Jennifer I am used to “one N or two?” and “starts with a J or a G?” However recently I was asked “is that Jennifer with an F?” I was tempted to say “nah, it’s a Jennipher” but refrained.
I’m a Jennifer (and I go by Jenny, not Jennie or Jenni) with a last name that is a very common color name and am constantly asked “Does that have an E on the end?” So honestly you can’t predict.
I am Team D@rcy. Always. But especially for this sibset! I also like that Swistle already suggested my favourite R boy name – Rupert. Very distinguished with D@rcy, and yes like previous commenter says – it continues the Ru-middle sound. Slam dunk.
Though, it you were to try an honour tweak, I really like:
D@rcy Royce
D@rcy Ronan
D@rcy Robb
I have a nine year old May (with a y, not with an e), and I can report:
1) people generally assume it’s spelled with an e
2) spelling out a 3 letter name that makes sense to people after you spell it is really low on the list of name inconveniences (some people have to spell Saiorse, and then pronounce it, and then reassure people that REALLY, that’s how it’s spelled/pronounced)
3) it doesn’t come up much, and it especially doesn’t come up much as the parent
4) people mostly can keep it straight after being told once
Since my daughter is 9, she recently got to order at Starbucks on for herself for the first time ever. She did not have to spell her name (which never happens to me) and they got it right (which NEVER happens to me), and she also didn’t seem to have big feelings about people spelling her name wrong sometimes. My guess is that she thinks it’s interesting that it can be spelled Mae, May, or Mei…not that it’s a great inconvenience.
I have a four-year-old M@e and I agree that the spelling issue is minor. My other kids have names with only one common spelling, and I spell their names just as often. Anyway, I love her name and it has worn so well in real life.
Someone I know with Irish-named babies recently showed me and my SIL this when they heard my niece was named Saoirse: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aVaHvRLlHr0&ab_channel=JustThesePlease
“My name has seven silent letters!!” haha
Agree. I have a May and we have to spell her name (in fact, I would say it’s more common for people to assume the M@e spelling first). And as someone who always has to add “with an ‘e’” when saying my name, I can confirm it has never been an issue!
I suspect Mae’d have to spell it out either way; the 2 versions seem to be about equal in usage.
D@rcy seems good to me, for all the reasons Swistle gave. Personally, I like Robert and don’t consider it stuffy at all, but then my Uncle Robert isn’t stuffy in the least, so I’m biased :) Robin’s pretty uncommon, could be considered literary, too, (and why can’t comics be literary?) Rupert and Ray would work nicely, too, imo
D@rcy Robin
D@rcy Rupert
D@rcy Ray
D@rcy Raymond
I agree, needing to spell Mae won’t be a big problem. I like Darcy, too. I like the suggestions Raymond, Robin, Roland, Ronan, Royce, Rupert, or Rhys for middles.
I love Mae and Darcy. Both delightful.
I am an Amanda and despite literally never ever seeing it spelled any other way, I still have to spell it.
If you’re worried about spelling, what about Maeve?
For a boy, I think Finnian Rex would make such a great combo!
Darcy is such a great name for this baby if it is a boy.
I like Randell or Rhodes for a middle. Or you could double down on romantic literary hero and choose Rochester, Romeo or Rhett.
I love your kids names so much. I think Mae and Darcy are so wonderful. I’m less fond of Sabrina, though the similar Sabine is pretty. I wonder if you both might like Simone.
I like the name Bennett or Bingham for a boy.
To echo other commenters, spelling names is not a big deal. Every member of my family has to spell our names at times (either because there are 2+ common spellings or because the name is uncommon enough that people don’t automatically know how to spell it).
Also I love the choice of Darcy! I think it’s a perfect match for Blythe…it’s unisex enough to not cast Blythe as a girl name and matches the style of Blythe better than other unisex names like Riley. I personally like Darcy Robin or Darcy Richard, but Darcy seems to go well with many options.
Rudy – sounds similar to Ruby though it’s not great with Darcy but could work if you go in a different direction and actually I think it fits as a first name with your subset.
Ralph – classic vintage name with grandpa feel
Rockwell – distinguished choice especially with Darcy
Roberts/Robertson – if you feel like Robert isn’t your style adding the “s” or “son” updates it a bit
Also I really liked the suggestion of Rupert with Darcy if you want to stick with the “Ru” theme
Thanks so much Swistle and to everyone who commented! Really appreciate it.
– I’m glad that M@e doesn’t seem like a major problem as far as spelling goes. It’s definitely my favourite choice!
– I quite like the idea of S@bine as a backup/alternative for S@brina. I like S@brina, but it doesn’t feel like it flows quite as much as part of the sibset. My husband originally wanted the name S@briel (from some books he likes) but I wasn’t a fan – so S@brina was the potential compromise.
– I LOVE the name Rupert and I honestly can’t believe I didn’t think of it myself! Genius! I would definitely be trying to advocate for D@rcy Rup3rt.
– Rhys is an interesting one – I would have been named Rhys if I were a boy. I don’t love the name, so probably wouldn’t use it, but it would be an interesting nod to my own history.
– R0b1n is a good one too, but there’s an uncle called R0b1n and it might make other aunts and uncles jealous…!