Baby Boy or Girl Sulka-with-a-B, Sibling to Julia

Hi Swistle,

So thrilled to have a reason to write a fellow name obsessive, even though I’m in a pickle! I’m 20 weeks pregnant and need a girl’s name just in case. We’re going to be surprised by the gender, like we were with our first daughter Julia Jane. Our boy name is pretty much settled on a family name (Nicholas nn Nico, although feel free to suggest middles, since I don’t know whether to match it to the name or the nickname).

As you’ve written before, I’m wondering if my “rules” are actually making this more difficult. Here’s what they are:
– My grandmother Marjorie always told me the prettiest names have “L”s in them.
– I would ideally like it to not end in an “-a” sound again. Is it too much with the -a ending in her last name, especially a second time? -ie and -y endings also help soften that hard K sound.
– Could work (or at least be pronounced) in most major languages so she can travel anywhere in the world and feel at home — particularly to France, where her grandparents live. I grew up abroad and this is important to me.
– Classic and feminine, but not overly common.

Of course, many of our top picks break one or more of these rules.
– Everyone, including me, likes Nora. But something sounds funny to me about it with Julia and possibly odd with the last name. Julia and Nora. Nora Sulka-with-a-B. Am I nuts?
– I love Chloe, husband does not. (I think French fashion house, he thinks Kardashian.)
– We both like Lily but worry it is too common (already used on our own street, for example.)
– I like Lucy but it’s associated with a very sweet relative who has suffered much personal tragedy. (However, my mother Charlotte was also named for a tragic relative 60 years ago and look how popular and pretty her name is now!)
Other top contenders: Grace, Abby, Wendy, Penny, and Margo

If anyone can help me, it’s you, Swistle! Baby Sulka-with-a-B will be born in January.

Warmly,
Allison

 

Good morning! Let’s start with your grandmother telling you that the prettiest names have L’s in them, which has become part of your naming rules. She was either (1) expressing a personal preference, or (2) flattering you in the manner of a grandmother telling a brown-eyed grandchild that brown eyes are best, or (3) both! But she was not stating an objective fact. I am taking that rule absolutely out of the running.

I don’t have experience with which names work internationally and/or in France, so I will just work with the list you have, and hope commenters who have more knowledge about that topic can add more options.

I agree with you that Nora is a little odd with the surname. I think it’s the pairing of two 2-syllable names ending with -a, but also there is something about the -ra running into the Bul- that my mouth doesn’t like. I don’t think it has to be a deal-breaker if the two of you agree it’s your favorite name, but I do see it. (It doesn’t seem odd to me with the sister name; I wonder if what you’re noticing is that Nora can be a little odd with the word “and.” Try saying just “Julia! Nora! Time for dinner!” or “Nora and Julia” and see if that is any better.) What I might prefer to do is name her Eleanor, which adds an L if you want one, and which I think is nice with Julia and works fine with the surname, and then call her Nora (or Ellie, or Lennie) as a nickname.

If Chloe is not quite right, I wonder if Cleo would work: same sounds, different order, no Kardashians.

I don’t see any problem with using the name of a sweet relative who has experienced personal tragedy. If it were the name of a relative who had CAUSED tragedy for others, that would be different—but if she has had sad things happen, but is herself a lovely person, and Lucy is a name you both agree on and like, then I think it should be a strong contender. I think it works well with the sister name, though it does repeat the same L/U sounds. Another possibility is to name her Lucille, and then use Lucy or Celia as nicknames.

You wouldn’t want to consider using your mother’s name, would you? It’s so unusual and fun to have a recent family name that’s currently in style, and it’s nice with the sibling name and with the surname. You could call her Lottie.

Margo feels a little clunky with the surname, but I think that’s the fault of the surname, which makes a lot of first names seem clunky (is it too late to switch to the other parent’s family surname?); and I like that it could be a reminder of your grandmother Marjorie.

I think Grace is a very nice option.

I love Abby and Penny, but as nicknames.

Wendy feels surprising with Julia.

I said I wasn’t going to add options, but I can’t resist the pretty French names list. Again: these may not meet the international preference, and for all I know these are awkward/different in French. But:

• Eloise! Eloise [S]ulka; Julia and Eloise
• Sophia! Sophia [S]ulka; Julia and Sophia/Sophie (adds another -a, but with three syllables, which I think works much better than two syllables)
• Sylvie! Sylvie [S]ulka; Julia and Sylvie
• If she is instead born in December: Noelle! Noelle [S]ulka; Julia and Noelle
• Simone! Simone [S]ulka; Julia and Simone
• Estelle! Estelle [S]ulka; Julia and Estelle
• Celeste! Celeste [S]ulka; Julia and Celeste
• Claire! Claire [S]ulka; Julia and Claire

For your boy name, you asked if you should match the middle to the given name or to the nickname, and I would say DEFINITELY to the given name (though I would double-check to make sure it didn’t create anything BAD with the nickname). It’s not certain the child will continue to use the nickname; and the middle name will be used almost exclusively alongside the full given name: on paperwork, at graduation, etc. Well, unless you think it’s likely you will regularly call him Nico Middlename, in which case the middle name should work with both the given name AND the nickname.

32 thoughts on “Baby Boy or Girl Sulka-with-a-B, Sibling to Julia

  1. StephLove

    I’m going to argue for keeping the L preference, not as an iron-clad rule, but as a nice-to-have. The reason is not because it’s objectively true, but because your grandmother may have said that because it linked your mother’s name to yours and that’s a sweet connection. If you were close to her, though, you could use her name. Marjorie B. sounds nice. Or Margaret if you like that better.

    I like Eleanor (nn Nora), Lily, Lucy, Abigail (nn Abby), Penelope (nn Penny), Gwendolyn (nn Wendy) and Charlotte for you. Or how about Louise? If Chloe doesn’t work, would Zoë?

    I agree. Match the middle to the given. How about

    Nicholas John
    Nicholas Maxwell
    Nicholas Samuel

    Reply
  2. Cupcakes

    I like Lillian (Lily) or Katherine (Kate) for you!

    Julia and Lillian

    Julia and Lily

    Julia and Katherine

    Julia and Kate

    These combos all sound fantastic! For the middle name, you could use Grace, Claire, or pretty much any one syllable name! I suggest a one syllable middle name with Lillian or Katherine because the first names are longer, so a one syllable middle keeps it balanced.

    Reply
  3. Alexandra

    I am going to make a pitch for my own name, Alexandra. It has an L! There are tons of nickname options! And it works in many, many languages. I lived in Europe for several years and very much appreciated having a name that was easily understood and translated.

    Reply
  4. Sargjo

    I made my own rule trying out names for you-I think three syllables over two is a super winner. Which is why even though Sylvie is my absolute favorite, I think Sylvia flows better and still isn’t too matcha with Julia!

    Reply
  5. Kerry

    I personally find the grandma story very sweet, and an easy way to connect you, your mother, your older daughter and this baby…but I did also notice that there are no L names on your list. My vote would be for Claire or Cleo, with an out of left field suggestion of one of my favorite names, Leonie. Eleanor seems like another good choice.

    Reply
  6. Cece

    Would you consider Lenora or Leonora as another Nora twist? That way you get an L in there if that’s your preference, and also some more nickname possibilities should you or your daughter want them further down the line. Julia and Lenora are a lovely name pair I think!

    My name is Celia and I’ve found it works very well on international level, the pronunciation varies but most people recognise it and can say it without too many issues. Cecile or Cecily would also work?

    Reply
  7. Renee

    I think a two-syllable A-ending name does sound a bit awkward with the surname, hence your hesitation with Nora. Julia is fine because of the extra syllable. I also agree with your rule about avoiding another A-ending name again regardless – that was my rule for my second as I felt it would make the sibset too sing-songy.

    With the L-thing, maybe to avoid making it too hard with your rules, definitely have the middle include an L, like Charlotte would be nice..! My grandfather told me French names are prettiest for girls, because all three of his sons chose French names for their daughters, but this only served as a cute comment for me and not a decisive factor – only one of my cousins carried on that ‘tradition’ with her daughters.

    Sounds like nothing on your list is perfect, so new ideas!

    Audrey
    Adele
    Eve
    Elle (see what I did there? ;-)

    You seem to be learning to one or two syllable names but here are some longer ones in case they interest you:
    Elodie
    Valerie
    Vivienne
    Genevieve
    I do love the suggestion of Eloise, one of my favourites and beautiful with Julia.

    For Nicholas, how about Charles or Major for a middle (after his grand / great grandmothers?)

    Reply
  8. Jd

    Instead of Eleanor, what about Lenora? Such an elegant name. leans into the “l”, more unique than Eleanor and still gets the Nora nickname.

    Reply
  9. Elizabeth

    Louise Charlotte (I just love them together, wow! 😍)? Caroline? Love Claire. A colleague just named his daughter Liana and it is so fresh and beautiful. Remind me of Linnea also, or the Spanish Leonor (which I love with your surname!).

    My name, Elizabeth, has worked well for me all over the world (I have lived abroad primarily in Europe).

    Reply
    1. Jean C.

      Annabelle
      Rosalie
      I also like Colette but only if this is a “last child” as it would make using Nicholas a little problematic. I love-love-love the name Eloise too.

      Reply
  10. sbc

    Mariel or Marielle: meets all your requirements and creates a connection to Marjorie!

    Lily, Elise, Camille, or Amelie could also work–Charlotte and Emily are also great but maybe too common for you? I do like a PP’s suggestion of Celeste though.

    Reply
  11. kate

    I do think with your surname, two-syllable first names where the emphasis is on the first syllable do sound awkward. Sorry, Nora! Nora as a middle name, maybe?

    First name thoughts:
    Harriet
    Hilary
    Marjorie (I know swistle suggested this, I’m just enthusiastically seconding it! an honour name for a beloved grandmother AND it’s sublime with julia AND it’s lovely and strong and works with the surname??! Yes yes a thousand times yes!)
    Cecilia
    Isabella/Arabella (four syllable names work particularly well with your surname, I think)
    Venetia (three syllables but still great)
    Sophia
    Rosamund (could call her Roz, rose, Rosie)

    Reply
  12. AlexiswithaG

    Whenever I hear “pretty French names” I first think of Camille.
    Also loved Celia, Cecily, and Natalie.
    But I’m also pro- double initials- so to match Julia Jane it would thrill me to no end to see a Camille Charlotte. Charlotte Celeste. Cecily Charlotte.
    Swoon!

    Reply
  13. KD

    I love the name Julia! I love Swistle’s suggestion of Eloise. Meets your rules, I think, and it’s just a delightful name!!! It works well with your surname, which is a big plus! I’ll add Colette. I think it meets your rules and also works with your surname. And is different than Julia but works! Good luck!!

    Reply
    1. Jd

      I’d like to also endorse Eloise. I actually know two sisters Julia and Eloise (one set in their late 90s, the other in elementary school). So pretty together, so French, with the only sound in common is the “L” – pretty names with Ls!

      Reply
  14. moll

    The suggestions of Camille, Celeste , Cecile and Colette are gorgeous and I think they sound nice with your last name. In addition to three-syllable names, two-syllable names where the accent is on the second syllable work well. The idea to do a C middle name is great! It’s a cool tie between the girls’ names and it gives you the option to call her CC as a cute nickname.

    Reply
  15. Kit

    I agree with others saying that it would be sweet to go with an L name, just for the story. BUT I think that would incline me to look at it as more of a requirement for any future children (or especially future daughters), because if you’re telling two of your children, “I picked a name with an L in it because my grandma always said those were the nicest names,” I’d worry the third would read between the lines, “And then… we ran out of the nicest names and had to give you a subpar one.”

    I don’t think an A ending is too much, either with the last name or with your older daughter. Girls’ names ending in A are so incredibly common that sisters sharing that ending doesn’t even stand out as a pattern to me. Julia, Nora, Sylvia, Clara, Sophia… would all strike me as a lovely coordinated set, not at all too matchy. I do think the A ending can create an odd rhythm with your surname if the first name also has two syllables, but a longer name (like Julia) flows really nicely and just ends up feeling very fluid and elegant.
    “Ee” ending names actually end up feeling a little harsh to me (or maybe it’s specifically two syllable -ee names? I don’t love Julie Sulka, but Cecily Sulka is lovely. But then Lucy Sulka sounds nice to me… I don’t know!). But that (and the -A ending concern as well), if very dependent on individual taste, so if you like it go for it!

    Reply
  16. Sal

    Gabrielle and Isabel (choose your preferred spelling) sprang to mind and I don’t think I’ve seen either posted. Isabel may not be the best with the surname, but I think Gabrielle is very nice.

    Reply
  17. Kate

    Your grandmother and I have similar taste – I love girls names with L in them. And Julia is one of my favorites! I am expecting twins, and if they were two girls they would have been Julia and Natalie, so I wonder if you like Natalie? Also, love Nicholas for a boy!

    Reply
  18. Carrie

    I love Cecily nn CeCe. My very favorite is Cecelia but unfortunately I think the lia at the end is too similar to be sisters with Julia (which is also one of my favorite names of all time).

    Amalie
    Natalie
    Celeste

    I had never thought about it before but I may agree with your grandmother about names with the letter L. They are so pretty!

    Reply
  19. Megan

    It sounds like Lily is close but not quite it, Perhaps Lillian would do the trick. Personally I would keep the l rule because the story is sweet.

    Reply
  20. Jen

    By “pronounceable in major languages” I assume you mean European languages because also wanting to include the letter L would make a name harder to pronounce in much of Asia where R and L often blend together (and not without good effect, I live in Japan where Juria, not Julia, is a common and beautiful name).

    Perhaps change that rule to just be “pronounceable in French” and that way you will know if it will work or not.

    Reply

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