Dear Swistle,
Wondering if you could help me… We’re due in 2 weeks with our 2nd child, a girl this time. For a middle name, I would like to honor my only living grandparent, who also happens to be an amazing lady! My problem is her name is Henrietta Mae. We’ve decided on the name June for the first name, so Mae doesn’t work as a middle. The other piece is my mom passed away 8 years ago, and I always thought I’d honor her in some way. Her name was Catherine.With my grandmother still alive, I’m slightly more interested in honoring her. Problem is I can’t find a good way to use Henrietta. Her mother’s name was Mary, as was my grandfather’s mothers name.
I was thinking June Mary Cate Mc—–. What do you think? Is that too wordy?
Thanks so much Swistle!
The missing piece of the letter is this: What is the reason Henrietta can’t be used as the middle name? It seems great to me: sassy and fun and underused. June Henrietta is terrific, and makes me feel happy to see it and say it.
If I had to guess the reason from context, I’d guess it was that you dislike the name. I would encourage you to consider using it anyway. I greatly disliked my grandfather’s name AND it was the name of my high school boyfriend (a very negative connection at the time). But my grandfather was alive when my son was born, and I knew he’d be so thrilled to have a namesake, so we went ahead and used his first name as my son’s middle name. (I would like to take a minute here to appreciate Paul for being cool with this even with the ex-boyfriend issue.) Every time I tell someone his middle name and every time I fill out a form that requires it, I have a happy warm feeling about using the name. And, to my surprise, 17 years later I realize I have come to really like the name: part of it is that the name is closer and closer to coming back into style, but I think most of it is that the positive association (with my grandfather, with my child, and with the memory of my grandfather’s reaction to having his name used) has worked its charm. My children were asking the other day, do I really LIKE the taste of coffee? And I said I don’t even know anymore: I used to hate it, but now the positive associations with it are so strong, I say “MMMMmmmmmm” with the first sip, and I perceive it as GOOD. This is very similar to the way I feel about my son’s middle name.
And in the case of Henrietta, I love the name to begin with, and wish it were a name in my own family tree. I realize that doesn’t mean YOU will love the name—but I’ve found that other people’s positive or negative reactions to a name can affect how I feel about the name myself. It may work the same for you, if I and a bunch of commenters are all like “HENRIETTA HEART HEART HEART!!!”
Or if it doesn’t, and I’m right that the issue is that you dislike the name, and a bunch of strangers loving it doesn’t help, it may help to think about how infrequently a middle name sees the light of day in most families. Some bring it out on a regular basis, but at my house we only see the middle names when we’re doing paperwork or when I’ve roped someone into a discussion of baby names. If you dislike the name, but you very much want to honor your grandmother, I suggest going ahead and just DOING it: after the birth announcements go out, the name won’t come up very often.
I am a fan of long names and of multiple middle names, so I would also be on board with June Henrietta Catherine Mc_______. (Or if you’re planning more children, I might plan to honor your mother with the next child.)
But if instead you decide on June Mary Cate Mc_____, I don’t think that’s at all too wordy. I think it has a very nice rhythm and sound. MaryCate could even be a single middle name, if you didn’t want two.
Yes to everything Swistle said! Stylistically, I feel like the names June and Henrietta are even on the same page kind of…maybe just because they’re both my style. Ha! We have a Harriet (kind of like Henrietta) and if we have a girl next, using June is a strong possibility. But if you don’t care for it…I like June Mary Catherine Mc– probably best.
Swistle nails it again. I would urge you to use Henrietta! I LOVE Henrietta and think it sounds so cute with June. I’ll share my little story – my husband’s first name is Bradley, which was such an 80s jock name to me when I met him and I didn’t love it, but I love him, and he wanted to use it as our first son’s middle name because that is a tradition in his family and I was happy to honor that. Six years later I am so happy with that decision, I love the way our son’s name sounds and that he shares it with his dad. And we made our second son’s middle name my three syllable Germanic maiden name, and I’m really happy with that decision as well! The middle name is a wonderful opportunity to honor a family member as directly as possible, maybe with a name you wouldn’t necessarily use daily, and I think you won’t regret it if you use Henrietta.
I vote Henrietta!
June Henrietta McWhatsit sounds full of spunk, and I would gush about meeting a baby June Henrietta to ALL of my friends.
If you want a variant, Henrietta is derived from Henry, but so is Harriet. June Harriet McWhatsit is also incredibly charming.
June MaryCate McWhatsit is probably more my style than the others — it’s so pretty. I know an Edith Maryjane and went around exclaiming rapturously about her name for weeks.
As Swistle said, “HENRIETTA HEART HEART HEART!!!”
Yep! Can’t agree more ;)
So much HEART HEART HEART that I kinda wish it was in the running for the first name slot! If Hazel is back in vogue, Henrietta must be on her way! Especially with a nickname like Haddie (daughter on Parenthood – I wonder if Henrietta was her legal name?) or Hattie.
Henrietta June Mc___ <3
June Henrietta Cate is lovely if you want to honor both your Mother and Grandmother. June Mary Cate is sweet too!
Does your Grandmother have a nickname, such as Hettie or Etta? June Catherine Etta perhaps?
I quite like the name Henrietta and it goes so well with June too!
Good luck!
I put in a vote for June Henrietta Mc____.
However, if that is off the table, I like:
June Etta Cate
June Catherine
June Mary Catherine
June Mary Cate
However, June Henrietta sounds so much nicer than the others.
June Etta Cate was my compromise name, but I am crazy about June Henrietta! Heck, I’d put Henrietta first, and call her Hattie June!
HATTIE JUNE! Heart heart heart!
I was coming here to say exactly that!!! Hattie June is the cutest.
Or Etta June, nn EJ? That also leaves room for you to use Henry for a boy, if you have one and want to.
If you want other H names for middles, maybe Hope? Honor? Haven? Honesty? Hailey?
I love Henrietta too but if that’s not something you want to use, I’m going to suggest Maryetta as a middle name! I was wondering the same as the poster above- does your grandmother have any nicknames?
June Maryetta Mc_______
I love, love, love Henrietta. Please use it!! Like Swistle, I wish it were a name on my own family tree. If you don’t like it, I do think it will grow on you. I wouldn’t be surprised if it rose in the popularity ranks with time and started to sound better to you, in addition to the positive associations Swistle mentions. And most of the time, you’ll call your daughter June Mc_____, anyway. But June Henrietta is just totally superb. :)
Love the suggestions of Etta or especially Marietta as the middle!! If you can’t be convinced of Henrietta, that is. I also love it.
June Marietta is lovely.
What will your grandmother think of a less than verbatim honour for her? Since she’s alive to hear it, I think you might have to consider her views, as opposed to honouring those passed, when you get can get creative. Will she love you using her mother’s name? Who’s mother is she? If she were my maternal grandmother I would consider honouring her late daughter (whose name she chose) to be a huge honour too. If you think you can get creative…
June Henley Cate
June Etta-Mae (I think the space between the ‘months’ make it just fine)
I just went through the middle-name-for-June dilemma with our daughter born this year. Her name, June, had been decided on many years ago but it wasn’t until I was actually pregnant with a little girl that we realized how hard finding a middle name for June was! Lots of lists, lots of discussions, and lots of Swistle baby name blog reading went into finding her the perfect middle name. I love Henrietta and I love Mary. We ultimately decided that a 2 syllable middle name ending in y was the right fit for our June. So maybe that makes my vote more towards Mary? Good luck and high-five for great taste in names :) :) :)
Like so many others, I just adore Henrietta and I find myself wanting to compel you to use it!
To me, Harriet–though a different name–is similar in sound and source (feminine version of Harry, a nickname of Henry) that maybe it could be used as an honor name? June Harriet is also lovely.
I also love the suggestion of Etta–June Etta runs together a little bit for me when I say it, but it doesn’t bother me enough to not use the name if I works for you!
Before I even read Swistle’s response, all I could think was, “They MUST use Henrietta in the middle!” I ADORE June Henrietta, and June Henrietta Catherine. Absolute naming perfection.
If you really don’t want to use Henrietta (weep) then I like June Mary Catherine. Keeping Catherine long helps with the slightly choppy feel of June Mary Cate (which is also fine).
HENRIETTA HEART HEART HEART!!! ;)
I’m on the June Henrietta bandwagon, for all the reasons people have already cited. If you just don’t like it, though, I prefer June Mary Catherine, or just June Catherine to June Mary Cate.
Wow, I LOVE Henrietta as a name, and as a middle name; if it was a possible honor name for us, I’d use it in a heartbeat. It’s just so unexpected, adorable but also not cutesy, historical and yet ripe to come back into style. Also, it’s so lovely with June. I think June Catherine would also be lovely, but June Henrietta– ahh, it makes me swoon!
I also reiterate what everyone else says, you could also use Harriet (a name I also love). But Henrietta is the original and also superior with June and just in general in your context.
Style wise I find June and Henrietta to be pretty similar and I love June Henrietta Catherine- and I am generally not a fan of multiple middles.
June Mary Cate is nice, but it doesn’t excite me as much as using both full names as middles. Personally, I’d go MaryCate or even Mary-Cate with this route.
I’ve racked my brain trying to come up with a way to smash up Catherine and Henrietta but I just don’t think there is a good way to do it. Catetta? Cathetta? Hetrine? Nothing really works
I’m also on team June Henrietta Heart Heart Heart = )
I think your situation sounds very similar to mine. I always planned to use honor names for my children, but never considered my grandmother’s first name (Beverly) as an option even though she’s very important to me and has always cared a lot about honor names. And then I picked a first name that I felt like ruled out her middle name as an option. It wasn’t until my daughter was about a year old and I was looking at her and thinking how natural it would feel for her to be named Beverly that I changed my mind. Luckily, I now have two daughters, the younger one’s middle name is Beverly, my grandmother is thrilled, and I have lots of pictures of the two of them together. But I highly recommend just going for it the first time around. June Henrietta is seriously awesome.
I do also like the suggestion of June Marietta above though, it that fits your taste better.
June Mary Cate strikes me as almost an ANTI-honor to your grandmother. You’re willing to use two middles, yet not her actual name, choosing instead to honor her mother — but not her. Henrietta is a fine upstanding name, even if it’s not your style. Catherine (or Cate, depending on what you associate more with your mother) is also a lovely name. I vote for Henrietta or Cate/Catherine or both in some order.
HENRIETTA HEART HEART HEART!!
Henrietta heart heart heart here too!
I like it so much I vote for having it be the first name with adorable nickname Etta. Henrietta June is awesome.
I would say if you really can’t stand the name, I would just honor your mother instead and go with June Catherine. The other options just don’t seem to honor her clearly enough.
HENRIETTA HEART HEART HEART
Henrietta. You must, you must. If your grandmother was dead, and you were doing it more as a memory name, I would say do whatever you want that reminds you of her. But since she is still alive, using the full real name is by far the biggest honor.
Plus it is an awesome name. Henry is soo trendy and popular right now, so it seems totally useable, and Henrietta sounds awesome with June. I LOVE it.
I would save Catherine for a second child. It also makes a lovely middle name.
I am also in the “HENRIETTA HEART HEART HEART” club, but I feel like you wouldn’t be asking unless for some reason you couldn’t use the name, so here are some diminutives of Henrietta to consider: Hallie, Hattie/Hatty, Jet/Jette, Jetta
June Jet might be too close to Joan Jett but I do like the spunk.
Let us know what you decide and congratulations!
How about Etta? June Etta or Etta June, calling her June?!
I think Henrietta is lovely! If you’d asked me years ago, though, I probably wouldn’t have liked it much, so I can totally understand if it doesn’t strike your fancy. But name tastes do change and I think Henrietta is the type of name that is coming back into fashion soon.
If you just can’t be on board with Henrietta, I think June Mary Cate is also very nice, and I like the suggestions I saw of using “Etta” as a way to work in Henrietta. Good luck!
How about June Catherine Henrietta Mc-? That order gives a very different flow and sound to the name, I feel, plus you could have the nickname of JC if you would like that. I do love June Henrietta Catherine as well, and implore you to reconsider using the full names in either order, as they will become your baby girl’s name – rather than simply an assortment of sounds – once they have been put on her! <3
I love Henrietta so much I suggest ditching June and naming her Henrietta Catherine. Nicknamed Hattie!!!
My second was named after living relatives and it gave us such pleasure for the honoree to know about the honor and to have that special connection. I don’t think substitute names have the same honor or meaning. Plus Henrietta is a GREAT name.
June Hettie Catherine or June Catherine Hettie would honor your grandmother. June Mary Cate is not too long.
Henrietta heart heart heart! I honestly adore June Henrietta (personally I’d even go for Henrietta June), but if you just can’t stand to do it if vote to use an actual nickname that your grandmother goes by or just to abandon the namesake aspect.
Agree with those above– June Henrietta is perfection!!!!!
HENRIETTA HEART HEART HEART!
Thank you everyone! I really appreciate it!
I LOVE June Henrietta Cate Mc—-
Our kids have two middle names, both are honor names – one for each side of the family – and we’ve never had any issues thus far. Plus, I love when people ask their middle names and I can say the first middle name is to honor X and the second name is to honor Y. It makes me smile when I think of their names.
Ps. Henrietta is an amazing kick a** name. I would keep it as such.
That being said, if you don’t like it, then I thinks June Mary Cate sounds great too! Whatever makes you happy and makes you think of your loved ones!
Keep us posted!
Use Henrietta!! Use it! Use it! June Henrietta is one of the most perfect names I’ve read on this blog.
Love June Henrietta! But if there’s a reason you can’t use that, or you really wanna include a name to honor your mom too, how about June Etta Cate? Etta for Henrietta, Cate for your mom. It would honor your grandma more than June Mary Cate imo.
If you go with June Henriette, it does the honors while saving you a syllable if your objection was to the length of Henrietta.
June Henrietta!! Heart heart heart!
I was always, always grateful that I gave my kids the honor middle names I did even though they may not have been my style or my favorite. So so meaningful.
But you know, if you go with June Catherine, it is an honor to your grandmother because that’s what she named her daughter. I might explain the choice to her that way, so she knows you honor her as well. There are more ways to honor someone than just using their own name.
I like the flow of Henrietta June better than June Henrietta. Both are very nice names.
I actually love the Henrietta and would keep it on my list if my son was named Henry! I also think Harriett is really cute, but Henrietta is great in your situation. I think June Henrietta Cate is a mouthful but cute. I also think Etta could work as a substitute if needed. When it comes to honor names, I think it is less important to love the name – especially when it is in the middle. I would explain to your husband that the middle name is hardly ever used and he should go for it since it’s an honor name.
My great-grandma was named Henriette and it was on my middle name list had my youngest been a girl. I love June Henrietta!
June Henrietta HEART! HEART! HEART! JHat! JHattie!! Junietta! JunieHen!
As with many others, I like Henrietta June even more.
TBH, though, I gotta say that until FB came along, hardly anyone knew what my middle name is. My son’s middle name almost NEVER gets used or heard. One of his preschool teachers almost said it. She said, “Fordon! Fordon Miller! FORDON MILLER, don’t MAKE me use your MIDDLE NAME!” It was hilarious. And now we do that at home, too.
JUNE HENRIETTA all the way!!!!