Monthly Archives: August 2012

Baby Boy Gabriel, Brother to Elizabeth Rose and Luke; And Middle Name Challenge for Luke _____ Gabriel

Jen writes:

So, I am getting rather pregnant now and will be having this baby around September 26th. (And that is a pretty solid date, as I am being induced for all sorts of medical reasons.) Once upon a time, when I was first pregnant years and years ago, my husband and I struck a bargain. If the baby was a girl, I got 51% of the naming decision and if it was a boy, he got 51%. And then the next baby, the “loser” got 51% regardless of sex. Well, the first named baby ended up being a girl, so I chose the name Elizabeth Rose. (Our last name is Gabriel, by the way. I am Jen and he is Matt. And yes, we were both born in 1981, how did you guess?) Elizabeth is my sister’s middle name and Rose was Matt’s grandmother’s first name. So Elizabeth’s name is two honor names but (ahem, don’t tell my sister this), those are mainly just names we liked and then we were like “oh, isn’t that convenient!”

Anyway, this time it is Matt’s turn to put in 51% of the vote. (The 51% can sound misleading, it’s just kind of that person’s job to come up with a name to which the 49% stakeholder says “oh, I love that name too!”) This baby is a boy. And we are stuck. We could name a girl in about fifteen minutes but we have been working on this boy’s name since MARCH and aren’t really much further. (I’m high risk, so I’ve been ultrasounded about a million times and have known it is a boy since twelve weeks. There is no doubt that it is a boy since this has been confirmed a good dozen times.)

Matt’s first choice for a name is John. And I love the name John. (Also, it is Matt’s middle name, which I think makes it extra great.) Except for one thing…the way it sounds when it is said out loud. Which is a pretty big thing for a name. It just sounds too short to me. And I’ve felt this way for a long time, as we have an acquaintance with a baby named John and every time she calls him, my brain says “and where is the rest of your name, kid?” So my feelings on this aren’t likely to change. Matt does not like Jonathan as a second option, mainly based on spelling. And his feelings haven’t changed since I first suggested that months ago.

Probably my front runner name right now is Andrew John. Neither of us like the nickname Andy (AT ALL), but one thing I have learned with having an Elizabeth is that we have pretty good control over nicknames, at least so far. She’s never called Beth or Liz or anything like that, mainly because Matt and I don’t use any of those. My dad had a short spell of calling her Lizzie, but since no one else used it or really encouraged it, Elizabeth it is. (She’s actually called Dibits a lot of the time because that is how she first pronounced Elizabeth herself as she was learning to talk and it stuck.) So if we went with Andrew, he would be called Andrew or Drew. Matt actually likes Drew quite a lot. But he’s not totally sold on Andrew and also feels like he wants to hold John in reserve in case we have another boy at any point.

Other names we have considered, in no particular order:

Kevin (we actually named our marriage project babies Kevin and Nicole, back in high school economics class. Matt and Jen: Naming Pretend Babies since 1998 and Can’t Do It For Real)

Steven (we like it but we both hate the nickname Steve and there’s not a lot you can do about that one)

Joseph (again, hate the nickname Joe or Joey)

Henry

Ryan

Charles

Peter

Walter

Tyler

We also love the name Michael and would probably use that without even thinking about it…but that is Matt’s youngest brother’s name and we already have a Michael. I’m totally anti juniors and I would never use a repeat name of a close family member. I would use a middle name (obviously, as we did) or a distant relative that we never see, but we see Mike quite a lot. (Also, Robert, but we have a very close friend Rob that lives near us that Matt sees on a daily basis. So no.)

Now, for my second naming dilemma. Last year, we had a late term loss of a little boy we named Luke. We discovered that he was dead before we discovered that he was a boy (I wasn’t high risk yet, so no ultrasounds every week), so we literally named him in a few minutes, in tears, after he was delivered. I’ve felt bad ever since that he never got a middle name. I would like to give him one now, but it would be just for us. We wouldn’t be going back and changing his official name on anything. I don’t really have any ideas for his middle name (and it hurts to think about it too hard). I’d like something that sounds good with Luke and maybe has some kind of meaning. So if you have any good ideas here, I would be grateful.

Now, go forth and name my baby!

I am gnashing my teeth, GNASHING THEM, over the John situation. John is one of my top favorite boy names, and you are SO CLOSE to using it, and “Elizabeth and John” is wonderful, and so I WANT to tell you that you DO NOT feel the way you do about the spoken-aloud version—but you have seen it happen on an in-person John, and so I agree with you (reluctantly, SULLENLY, agree with you) that it sounds like that’s not going to work out. (Gnash gnash.) (Would it help if you could call him Jonty as a nickname? Or is that the same spelling issue as Jonathan?) (And you could call him Baby John until John didn’t seem so short anymore!) (GNASH.)

Another John option is to give him a double name—either by actually giving him two first names or by calling him by first and middle. It gives you John, while also giving you a longer name to say.

May I suggest the pseudonym I’ve grown very fond of with the name Elizabeth? I call my twins Elizabeth and Edward as their blog names, and my mom and I have over the years found that now we almost wish I HAD named them Elizabeth and Edward: we find the names so appealing together and separately. Edward Gabriel.

If Edward is close-but-not-quite, I love the name Edmund.

Instead of Kevin or Steven, perhaps Evan or Ian.

I love Henry from your list. We almost used it for our youngest boy, but then another name took the lead so I contented myself by using it as his blog name. Henry Gabriel. Maybe Henry Michael or Henry Robert or Henry Tyler? Or, the middle name position is the perfect place for a love-the-name-but-hate-the-nickname name: a Henry Joseph or a Henry Steven completely avoids Joe/Steve.

Now. Brace yourself, because I want to push you to use a name on my “Why Won’t People OBEY Me?” list (also on that list: John, Karl, Louise). It’s a bit of a hard-sell name, but it goes beautifully with the names on your list. It’s George. GEORGE. Let it sink in. Think of George Clooney, perhaps.

George Gabriel. It’s one syllable like John, but it takes longer to say. Possible downside: would it bother you that the initial sounds were two different pronunciations of the letter G? Another possible downside: a little tricky to find a middle name. George Michael is out. George John is choppy. George Robert, George Steven, George Joseph—nothing clicks into place, quite. I looked up George Clooney’s middle name, and it’s Timothy; that does work well! Maybe something else with more than two syllables: George Nathaniel, George Everett, George Oliver, George Zachary—yes, I think the key might be to go for more syllables.

I like Everett and Oliver as first name options, too. Everett Gabriel, Oliver Gabriel.

James is another “one-syllable but may feel longer” option. James Tyler Gabriel, James Henry Gabriel, James Michael Gabriel.

I think a Benjamin would make an adorable little brother for an Elizabeth. Benjamin Gabriel; Elizabeth and Benjamin. Nickname issues to consider, though.

Or Nicholas. Again with nickname issues.

Or Owen would be sweet, and no natural nicknames.

For Luke, I suggest the middle name Matthew, after his father. Luke Matthew Gabriel.

Or if your maiden name would work, then he would have his own name, then a name from his mother, then a name from his father.

Or I might use the opportunity to honor an important male family member. It might be too painful for a living family member to be honored in this way (my first suggestion may be too painful for your husband), but perhaps a grandfather or great-grandfather or great-uncle.

For a meaning name, some baby name books say Geoffrey/Jeffrey means “peace” or “God’s peace.” The Oxford Dictionary of First Names says the name Noah means “rest” or “to comfort”; the name Solomon means “peace”; and the name Wilfred means “a hope for peace.”

Name update! Jen writes:

Greetings, Swistle and Baby Namers!

Our baby was born on September 26, with me arriving at the hospital in strong labor ten minutes before my scheduled check-in time for my induction. So the induction became a moot point and Ryan Matthew was born safely and alive, two hours later, at exactly 6:00pm!

Thank you for all your naming advice. A few weeks before he was born, I demanded three finalist names from my husband. Then we both said “Ryan? Hmm. Yes. Ryan.” And after lots of jokes about giving him the middle name Brian, we chose Matthew since Matt likes namesakes and would like to have one, if it weren’t a deal breaker for me. One of item of note- many of them names suggested both by you and by the commenters were names we either considered and dropped (close friends or similar reasons) or names of close family members. (Both Matt’s brothers’ first and middle names were suggested.) So obviously you are very good at matching our naming style!

Here is Ryan’s birth announcement!

Baby Girl Ferreira, Sister to Nicolas Vi

15 Replies

Jennifer writes:

I really love your blog and have been following it since I was pregnant with my son. My husband and I are expecting our second child, a girl, at the end of Oct. this year. We’re having a difficult time coming up with a name. My husband’s name Michael Ferreira and my name is Jennifer Dai-Ferreira. We’ve decided on a Vietnamese middle name to pay tribute to my heritage. The middle name will be “An” pronounced like the name “Ann”. It means peace in Vietnamese. We have a 3 year old son named Nicolas Vi Ferreira. His middle name is also Vietnamese and means vitality or strength. It was also the name of my great grandfather.

My husband and I are considering the following names for our baby girl:

Madeleine

Penelope

Giselle

Sophie

My favourite is Giselle but I don’t think it works with the middle name ‘An’. I’m considering adding another middle name before An but I’m afraid it may be too cumbersome.

As for the name Madeleine, I’m afraid it may sound too old fashion and I don’t like the nickname ‘Maddy’. I would prefer ‘Leni’.

I like the name Penelope but I’m not in love with it.

I also like the name Sophie but I’m not sure it’s a name that could carry her from childhood into adulthood.

Since both my name and my husband’s name are so common, we would like to give our daughter a less common name. There were always at least two other Jennifer‘s in my class growning up.

Lastly, I want to give her a name that will withstand the test of time and will serve her well wherever her life and career takes her.

Any suggestions would be welcomed!

If it’s important to avoid common names, Madeleine and Sophie are both probably out. The Social Security Administration lists Sophie as the 51st most popular girl name in the United States—but Sofia is the 19th, and Sophia is number one. And adding up the various spellings of Madeleine, Madeline, Madalyn, Madelyn, Madilyn, etc., brings that right into the Top Ten.

Madeleine, furthermore, can feel like it’s in a group with the other Maddy/Addy names (Madison, Addison, Adelyn, etc.), which may make it feel even more common than Sophie/Sophia/Sofia: a classroom with only one Madeleine but also a Madison, and Addison, and an Adelyn may feel similar to a classroom with two or three Jennifers. This feeling could be significantly reduced if she goes by Leni—but I think that nickname might be a hard-sell for a public so accustomed to the Madeleine/Maddy combination, a bit like trying to get a Jennifer called anything but Jen or Jenny: possible, but challenging.

The good news about the names’ popularity means that Madeleine definitely doesn’t sound old-fashioned right now, and Sophie will definitely be considered a childhood-to-adulthood name (though you could also use Sophia and nickname her Sophie). And since the current #1 most popular girl name in the United States is only used about 1/3rd or 1/4th as much as the name Jennifer was in its #1-status prime, perhaps neither one is so common it needs to be ruled out.

Penelope is less common but is currently doing a bit of a race up in popularity; it’s hard to know where that will end up. Penelope An is adorable, however, and Penelope is currently only the 169th most popular girl name. For perspective, the Social Security Administration reports than in 2011 there were 28,980 baby girls named Sophia/Sofia, and another 4,690 named Sophie, but only 1,847 named Penelope.

I think your favorite is also great, and that Giselle An Ferreira works just fine. The name Giselle is slightly more common than the name Penelope (there were 2,030 new baby girls named Giselle in 2011), but it feels LESS common because it’s been doing less leaping-and-bounding up the charts. It has been rising, perhaps because of the currently popular -elle ending, but seems to have tapered off for now.

If you had a back-up choice for the middle name, Gillian/Jillian or Gianna would be similar options. Ooo, or Geneva or Genevieve or Georgia or Josephine or Annabel! Or Gemma or Noelle or Lena. And I always think of Fiona when I’m considering Sophia, but I’m not sure how well that goes with the surname.

Baby Name to Consider: Grover

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Jenn writes:

I am (unfortunately) not yet pregnant, but in a trivia quiz today my husband and I came across the name Grover (the question was about Grover Cleveland). We both decided that we like the name, and are considering it for our ever-growing-and-changing-shortlist. However, we are aware of the very strong association with Sesame Street. So I’m wondering what everyone thinks. I know that the association will be strong for most, but does it make it unusable? Would it be better in the middle name slot? What makes it different to Oscar, also from Sesame St, but now on so many cute wee boys?

Hope you and your fabulous readers can help us out.

PS – Before you say it’s no good – how cute would little Grover in a Super Grover shirt be?

PRETTY CUTE, that’s how cute. I have three associations with the name Grover:

1. Loveable furry Sesame Street Grover.

2. Former U.S. president Grover Cleveland.

3. A former hippie co-worker of mine, who used to ask me in dreamy tones how many birds I’d seen today. (Bird-counting is how you show you’re tuned in to nature around you.) (Apparently.)

The comparison to Oscar is a good one: without it, I’d be tempted to say I was afraid the name Grover was too tied to Sesame Street—but you’re absolutely right, the name Oscar is managing to overcome that. In 2011, the Social Security Administration reports 2,359 new baby boys named Oscar—but only 9 named Grover. WHY?

Even more mystifying, Oscar isn’t the recent “finally overcoming the television show” success I’d been thinking of it as: it was in the Top 100 until 1925, and it’s stayed steadily in the 100s and 200s rankings ever since. I’d have thought it would have gone down in popularity after Sesame Street aired, but in fact it got MORE common.

The name Grover had a remarkable surge in popularity around the time Grover Cleveland was president in the late 1800s, and then dropped to mostly the 200s and 300s for about 50 years, then dropped even further (400s, 500s, 600s, 700s) in the next 25 years, and then disappeared from the Top 1000 altogether in 1974 and hasn’t been back.

WHY? Theories welcome! And in the meantime, let’s have a poll over to the right, with reasons for our voting choices in the comments section. [Poll closed; see results below.]

Poll results for “What do you think of the name Grover?” (468 votes total):

I love it! I’d want to use it! – 34 votes (7%)
I like it! I’d want to consider it! – 62 votes (13%)
I like it for someone else’s baby – 161 votes (34%)
No particular opinion – 14 votes (3%)
Slight dislike – 99 votes (21%)
Strong dislike – 98 votes (21%)

Baby Naming Issue: Is it Okay to Use the Same Middle Name for Two Children?

29 Replies

Bethany writes:

I currently have two children with names I love- Daniel Henry and Elsa Catherine. I am pregnant again and am considering these names: William Henry and Clara Catherine. The thing I like about the middle names is how well it flows with our last name, Hyde. We do call the kids by all three names quite often. My spouse thinks this idea is nuts, and I am just wishing that I named our son William instead Daniel and our daughter Catherine instead of Elsa. He may be right, I may have to mourn the perfect names William Henry Hyde and Clara Catherine Hyde.

Unless the Swistle Baby Naming Cohort thinks its not too odd to share middle names.

My vote is that it’s not too odd! I think of the middle name as a perfect place to…PLAY, I guess. It’s where you can do things you wouldn’t do with a first name: for example, use names that are not really your style but you love them anyway, or use names that have deal-breakers such as bad nicknames or bad initials or a problem with your surname, or use names that are too way-out-there or too overly-common for your preferences, or use names that would have clashed with sibling names—or use duplicate names.

The one downside is that I think once you do it, you have to do it for all the siblings of that sex (and maybe also for the siblings of the other sex), which can make first-name selection difficult. You don’t actually, literally HAVE to, but the pressure would be intense, and NOT doing it would take it from a fun “This is a cool bonding thing we do in our family!” (with the fun possibility that the children might grow up to do a version of it with their own children) to an odd “Hey, how come they get their own names and I don’t?”

Middle Name Challenge: Everleigh _____ O’Donner-with-a-C

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Lanie writes:

My husband and I are expecting our first child (a girl) in December. We have already settled on the name Everleigh. In fact, there were really no other first names we were considering for a girl. We are trying to find the most perfect middle name, but are having a hard time finding a middle name to go with Everleigh. Our last name is O‘Donner, but with a C.

My husbands top choices in this order are:

Paige

Aspen

Lil

We also considered a family name Lillienne for a middle name before we came up with Everleigh (but vetoed it because it seems to heavy on the “L’s”). I’m not sure I want to start the family names with our first and feel we need to keep that tradition up for subsequent children. I like the idea of our child having his/her own identity. Although my husband did okay “Lil” to be on the middle name list for my grandmother who goes by Lil nearly exclusively. Again, heavy on the “L’s”, but it’s a short one syllable name with meaning for us.

I like Everleigh Paige, but feel that we just picked Paige arbitrarily because it sounded nice. I feel like there could be a better middle name out there. Our styles are decorative names that feel a little old fashioned, that are different, not in the top 1000 (but for the middle name is okay) and bring in some nature words. For instance, we plan on Ever for a nn. Because Everleigh seems so illustrious when written out, I feel she needs a shorter middle name with less syllables, and more meaning. I’ve done some google searches and found out that other people that named their daughters Everleigh named the middle names “Skye”, “True”, and “Rae”. I feel like we need a similarly short name, that is pretty and meaningful or strong.

Aspen is on the list because we both love nature and it was one of the only ones we could agree on. I just am worried it might be too “granola” of a name, which points us back to Paige.

My husband vetoed:

Claire

Lux (to heavy on the “L’s” again), but I liked the idea of a short one syllable name meaning “light”

And I vetoed:

Quinn (although I have to admit it sounds nice, I’m just not a fan of the name)

Siobhan (too much Irish for me with our last name)

To give you an idea, our boys names list was:

Lachlan Blaze

Chase River

Brahm Hayden

I liked all of these names so much, I was relieved when finding out we were having a girl so I didn’t have to choose between them.

Can you give me some ideas and opinions about middle names that are one syllable (or two) that might flow well with Everleigh? Your website is the best resource I have found for baby naming ideas, and I would love to get this settled in my mind. My husband is perfectly fine with Everleigh Paige, but he is open to hearing something that might be better. That will probably be her name if we don’t figure something else out, but something bothers me that I am not feeling like “Yes! That will be her name!!”

Thanks for all your help!

The middle name position is an especially nice place for any name you liked very much but without wanting to use it as a first name. If, for example, you really liked the name Rose but not with your surname, it would make a great middle name. Or if you initially loved the simplicity of names like Anne or Jane or June or Mae but then realized they weren’t your naming style, they too would make great middle names.

I found when I was thinking it over that I’m with you on the L sounds: Claire is one of my favorite names and it’s great with the rhythm of Everleigh—but I don’t like it as much as I like Everleigh Anne or Everleigh Rose.

The middle name is also a nice place for a meaningful sentiment name, especially with the nickname Ever making a little motto out of it:

Amore
Constance
Faith
Grace
Hope
Joy
Justice
Love
Mercy
Patience
Peace
Promise
Prudence
Sage

For something more naturey:

Acacia
Bay
Brook
Daisy
Fern
Fleur
Garland
Iris
Jade
Juniper
Lake
Lark
Linden
Pearl
Rain
Rose
Rowan
Sage
Spring
Violet
Willow
Wren

Sage seems like one of the best from the lists: it’s very similar to your frontrunner Paige, but it has both attribute and nature associations. And Ever Sage (“always wise”) is a great motto.

Jade also has some of the same sound as Paige, but with a nature association.

I think my own picks would be Everleigh Joy, Everleigh Garland, and Everleigh Spring.

Baby Name to Consider: Kilo

49 Replies

E. writes:

I am looking to get opinions on a name I’ve been considering. I am only 6 weeks pregnant, and we are choosing to not know the sex of our baby until birth. Our last name is Lawrence so I really do want a unique first name to go with our common last name. One boy name that I really like is Kilo (kee-loh) with a family name for the middle name. I got the idea from hearing a gentleman as a guest speaker on the radio, he was named Kilo and I really like what he was speaking about. I also really like how the name is simple and still unique. At one time I also liked the name Keno but quickly dismissed that name due to its association with gambling which I choose to not gamble for my own moral beliefs. Now with Kilo, would people associate this name with anything negative? Like drugs? I kind of live in a bubble and not sure if drug dealers use kilos more commonly or grams or some other unit of measure? Possibly I am overthinking this but wondering what somebody’s first thought is when they hear “Kilo” I do love the name however I don’t want any regrets if people have a negative association with its word form.

My associations aren’t negative, but they’re definitely measurement-related rather than name-related: Kilo is filed in my mind with words like meter, yard, inch, and gram. The name is not in the Social Security Administration’s baby name data base for 2011.

If I saw Kilo used as a name, I would think it might be pronounced Milo with a K.

Another association was niggling in the back of my mind; I finally figured out it was reminding me of Cee Lo Green, who sang the huge hit “F**k You!” in 2010.

What does everyone else think of the name potential of Kilo?

Baby Girl or Boy Tune

28 Replies

Ashley writes:

I’ve been reading your blog daily for over a year now, well before I was even pregnant, and I’m a huge fan! Since I’m one of those people that have been naming my future children since I was 8, I’m surprised and frustrated that we are having so much trouble. I am currently 33 weeks, due in mid September. We do not know the gender, which has been quite the fete after requiring an amnio and several ultrasounds. With everyone around us (doctors, techs, etc.) knowing the gender, Ive gotten the vibe it’s a boy. My husband however, is convinced it’s a girl. One of us is going to be very surprised!

Anyways, here is some background on us. My name is Ashley Bray, husband is James Anderson and our last name is Tune (spelled differently).

We are pretty set on the boys name, James Wiley and he will go by Wiley. My father in law is James Russell, my husband is James Anderson, so we like the idea of keeping with this tradition. However, both my husband and FIL go by Jim, and it gets really confusing at times, so we want him to go by his middle name. I love that Wiley is unique, but a name most people have heard of before. Possible future brother name is Drake (my maiden name).

Now for the real problem, finding a girls name we both like. My style is last names at first and/or androgynous. I don’t like anything too girly/frilly or overly popular. My husband on the other hand seems to be stuck in the 70’s and 80’s with his naming style.

We would like to use the middle name Bray (my middle name and grandmother’s maiden name) as long as it works well with the first name we decide on.

My list of faves that hubby has vetoed:
Campbell (soup association)
Rowan (because he has a rowing machine…crazy, I know!)
Finley (his neighbor growing up’s last name)
Leighton
Arden

His list:
Nicole-nickname Nix
Allison
Jessica

Names we agree on:
Ellis
Lowen/Lowan (rhymes with Owen)
Nix

However, I have issues with each of these names. Is Ellis too close to all the Elle, Ella and Ellie’s out there? Does Lowen/Lowan seem like a made up name? And Nix is ok, but I would want a better full name. Nicole is too old school, I don’t care for Nicolette and Nixon has a negative association. Can you think of any other names Nix could be short for?

I would greatly appreciate any other name ideas you and your readers have for us.

Thanks!

Ha, yes, your husband definitely has ’70s/’80s style going on there. I don’t know why this is a problem for so many men! Maybe they are less likely to be around little kids, or less likely to think about baby names? I swear that when Paul and I were naming babies he just thought, “Hm, who did I go to high school with?” and made his list from that!

Sometimes it helps to find names similar to the ones someone likes, but more current—just to sort of eeeeease them into it. Instead of Nicole: Nola, Nora, Nadia, Victoria, Annika, Colette, Logan. Instead of Allison: Addison, Adelyn, Emerson, Ellison. Instead of Jessica: Annika, Gemma, Veronica, Danica, Genevieve, Josephine.

But after seeing his reasons for vetoing other names (you can’t use Rowan because he…has a rowing machine?), I’m not sure that will help. It may need to be a swift firm explanation: “No, honey, those are the mom names now. Here, take a look at the current Social Security list.”

Would he like any names similar to the names on your list? Brinley instead of Finley? Payton instead of Leighton? Arwen or Garnet instead of Arden?

Ellis has almost certainly come into style because of other popular El- names. It’s much less common, but may still have a “group” feel to it. Ellery and Ellison are other possibilities; Ellison is particularly awesome because of how similar-yet-different it is to your husband’s idea of Allison. If you wanted to avoid the El- grouping, you could consider Hollis.

Lowen ought to be a gorgeous, distinctive choice, but Lindsay Lohan has ruined it for me. She and her struggles will, one hopes, not dominate the name for ever—but sometimes celebrities go on for decades, continuing to be well known mainly for their various issues. It would worry me—and yet the more I say Lowen, the more I want to find a way for you to use it. My mom came upon the name Elowen awhile back, and I wonder if that would fit the bill: no Lohan association, the El- of Ellis, the -owen of Rowan, and even some of the sounds of Nicole and Allison.

Because I’ve never encountered Nix as a name or nickname, my only association is with the word nix, as in to veto or say no to. Well, and also some Nixon, of course, and some rock star association because of Stevie Nicks and Nikki Sixx. I think it would sound cute (more like how Nicki sounded to our parents: sassy but sweet) once I knew a little girl with the name, but I agree with you that it should be a nickname. You could use it as a nickname for Lennox, which I think meets your other preferences: not too girly, and it’s a surname name. Lennox Tune, nickname Nix.

It’s perhaps a stretch, but Nix could also be short for Annika or Danica.

Baby Boy Farris-with-an-H; Are These Names Too Feminine?

46 Replies

Melody writes:

I’ve been reading your blog for a while now, anxiously awaiting the time when I would actually need your help! I’m exited to say that I’m expecting my first child, so the time has finally come! my name is Melody and my husband is Brendon. Our last name is Farris with an H. We are expecting a son in 3 1/2 weeks and are almost set on a name. Luckily, my husband and I have very similar naming styles and a couple of names that we love and sound perfect with our surname. So what is the problem you may ask? Well, most 5 of our top choices are extremely common and well established girls names. While most of them had strong roots as boys names years ago, they are now considered as completely “girly”. While these are the names that we absolutely love, we don’t want our son to grow up being constantly teased. We could really use some advice on what you, as a mother and an expert, think is usable!

The name that we had picked out for a girl was Amelia Bianca called Mila or Bianca Mila called Bebe.

Here are the 5 names in order from least to most favorite:

Our least favorite right now is Shay. It doesn’t really fit with our usual style but I love the sound! However, we are constantly tortured by the fact that our neighbor has a little girl Shea… and I hear this as a girls name quit often around where we live.

After Shay, we really like Morgan. This seems so boyish to me I can’t even picture it on a girl. However we have gotten many comments that it is “unusable” for a boy, and he’ll be tormented and teased… While I do kind of agree it breaks my heart because I love the name so much!

Also love the name Robin. This also seems so masculine because of Robin Hood of course, Robin Williams, and singer Robin Thicke… We were thinking of naming him Robert and calling him Robin, but I just don’t love Robert like I love Robin. My husband suggested Robinson, but my best friend just told me that that is what she is going to be naming her son! Now I feel like that rules out Robin for me too so maybe this isn’t an issue anymore…

But our most favorite right now is Kay. Me and my husband both love it and already see it as our sons name… yet its probably the most girly name of the bunch! When I hear it, I think of Sir Kay (from the King Arthur stories, he was his brother), and it was originally an english boys name. However, it is now probably most known as a nickname for the girls name Katherine.

I’ve come to realize that I can’t name my son Kay without worrying about him getting teased later, so we decided to just use it (if we do end up using it) as a nickname. We really love the name Zachary, which is obviously a strongly established boys name, and were thinking of naming him Zachary Hugo (middle name will be Hugh or Hugo no matter what), and calling him Kay, even though they are 2 completely different names.

Along with that, some other options we thought of were, Mackay/McKay called Kay, Cassius/Caspian called Cay, Clayton called Cay (we really like this one). (Sidenote: we like the spelling Kay better, but feel that Cay is more masculine.)

What do you and your readers think?

On a different note, I was watching the old Bravo tv show 9 By Design the other day, and learned that one of the boys on the show is named Holleder. I forget who he was named after, but I’ve really started to love the name! Hollister is an old family name on my side, so we could just say that Holleder was a family name to anyone who asked. But then again, I wouldn’t want it to seem like I named my son after those people!

I just feel like whichever way we go we are setting our son up for years of nasty remarks! Should we just name him Zachary Hugo and call him Zach?

Ahhh I’m literally tearing my hair out! Swistle, we need your help! What do you think about Kay? Holleder? Morgan? Are they too girly? Please let me know!

Thanks so much!! We appreciate your help.

My own opinion is that Kay is too feminine for a boy. However, I think the initial K. is not too feminine, and I’ve noticed initial-nicknames seem to be coming into style: several people recently have mentioned using, for example, E. as a nickname for Elliot, or J. as a nickname for James. I think you could name him any name starting with a K (Keane, Keaton, Keegan, Kent, Kian, Kieran, Kyle, Kyler…), and then use K. as his nickname. There may be a couple of auditory double-takes, but probably not a huge deal.

Or would you like the name Kai? The pronunciation is a little different, but it’s solidly a boy name. It can be a stand-alone name, or it can be short for Caius.

Or I wonder if you’d like the nickname Kip. I think it’s adorable, and that its appeal is similar to Kay’s. It’s used as a nickname for Christopher.

McKay seems like it might be a very good solution, but I worry that it’s too similar to Makayla. It’s common to have very similar boy/girl versions of a name (Kyle and Kylie, for example), but the name McKay is very uncommon and the name Makayla is very common, so I worry more about confusion.

I know one boy named Shea. It does seem like a very soft and gentle name, but it strikes me as unisex rather than girl. According to the Social Security Administration, in 2011 there were 232 new baby boys and 298 new baby girls named Shea/Shay/Shaye. One option would be use Shane; you could even still call him Shay.

Because you like both Shay and Kay, I suggest Jay. According to the Social Security Administration, the name Jay was given to 700 boys and 0-4 girls in 2011. My mom and I both love the name; she’s said that if she had another baby boy to name, she’d like to call him Jay.

I’d also like to suggest Hayes, and I think the HHH initials would be fun, but I’m not sure it works with the surname.

Wade would work well.

The “ay” sound is also prominent in a number of currently popular boy names: Aiden, Brayden, Cayden, Hayden, Jaden, Leyton, Mason, Peyton, Rayden, Zayden, etc.

I haven’t encountered the name Holleder before, and had to look up how to pronounce it. I didn’t find a clear answer, but one site said something that made me think it might be pronounced like Hollander but without the N sound: Hah-leh-der. Or is it like Holder? In fact, Holder might be a good one to add to the list of options. It seems dicey to say Holleder is a family name if it isn’t, and the spelling/pronunciation issues seem significant. It’s too bad Hollister doesn’t really work with the surname; I love family surnames as first names.

Morgan does seem to have crossed to girl, though not entirely: the Social Security Administration reports 469 boys and 3640 girls named Morgan born in 2011. Notice that although there are many more girl Morgans than boy Morgans, there still are quite a few boy Morgans. Other options: Keegan, Logan, Finnegan, Morrison, Rohan, Riordan, Malcolm.

If you decide Robin isn’t out for you (is your best friend expecting a baby boy right now, or is she just talking about some possible boy in the future?), it could also be short for Robertson—though I like it best in its traditional role as a nickname for Robert. I think it’s okay if you don’t like the name Robert as much as the name Robin; it’s common to accept a name to get a nickname or to accept a nickname to get a name, and rarer to love both name and nickname equally. The Social Security Administration shows 301 baby girls and 99 baby boys named Robin/Robyn in 2011, and I think any “girl name” protest could be put down pretty quickly with that list of famous male Robins.

Update—Melody writes:

Hi Swistle! Thanks to you and your readers for all your help and suggestions! You’ve helped so much.
I just wanted your opinion on one more thing. We recently heard of the name Cayman/Caymen, and think it is really cute (and masculine:)! We would of course call him Cay. However, my husband feels like we’d be “making up” the name… I’ve never really met another Cayman, so I’m not sure if he’s right or not… However, this has become a frontrunner for us, so I wanted to know what you and your readers thought of it.
Again, thanks for all the help!

Name update! Melody writes:

Hi Swistle!
I feel horrible that I haven’t updated you sooner, our little boy is 9 months old now(!), but things have been so hectic lately. But I thought, hey better late than never:) I wrote you all the way back in August, scared that the names we loved for our son we all too feminine, and your response really helped us pick a wonderful name.
Kaleb Hugo (H)arris was born at the end of August and we have been calling him Kay ever since (with no resistance whatsoever I might add). We had narrowed it down to
Kaleb “Kay” Hugo
Christopher “Kay” Hugh
Christopher “Kit” Hugh
and loved Kaleb the best.
(we also loved Robin, but my best friend, who was pregnant at the time and has had twins since, ended up naming one of her boys Robinson, and it fits him perfectly:)

So… thank you so so much, your help is greatly appreciated!!

(On a side note, I recently found out that I am pregnant again (hooray!), so we might be emailing you again soon!)

Baby Naming Issue: Is the Name John Watson a Problem?

21 Replies

Rachel writes:

My husband is Nick and I’m Rachel. Our last name is Watson. We’re having a boy on November 7 and have a name that we really love. It’s John. The problem is that our son would share his name with the doctor in the Sherlock Holmes stories.

Sometimes it seems like a big deal, since there have been quite a few Sherlock Holmes films and TV shows lately and it’s a well known character. Other times I just think that it’s not like it’s the name of an evil character or anything bad and just not important at all really.

We’re planning to call him John and don’t like Jonathan or Jack. The middle name will be Nicholas.

Oh, how interesting! I am moderately familiar with the Sherlock Holmes stories (have read some recreationally, and also had to study a couple of them in school), so I’m definitely familiar with Watson, and he would be my first association if someone gave a child the first name Watson. But somehow I had not retained the information that Watson’s first name was John; I think of him as “Watson,” and that’s it. And, as you say, Watson is a GOOD character, not a bad guy or anything.

It has been a long time since I read/studied a Sherlock Holmes story, however, and I haven’t seen any of the recent movies or television shows, so my Sherlock Holmes knowledge is hardly what I’d call FRESH. Also, I am extremely biased, because I love the name John and I fervently want you to be able to use it.

So I think we need a poll, to let cooler heads prevail. As usual for this sort of situation, I want to divide the “it’s a problem”/”it’s not a problem” opinions into two groups: those who knew already that John was Watson’s first name, and those who didn’t. [Poll closed; see results below.]

Poll results for “The name John Watson” (512 votes total):

I knew Watson’s first name; it’s a problem – 35 votes (7%)
I knew Watson’s first name; it’s not a problem – 127 votes (25%)
I didn’t know Watson’s first name; it’s a problem – 10 votes (2%)
I didn’t know Watson’s first name; it’s not a problem – 334 votes (65%)
I can’t decide – 6 votes (1%)

Baby Name to Consider: Kimbra

11 Replies

J. writes:

I was recently introduced to the music of New Zealand musical artist Kimbra aka Kimbra Lee Johnson and thought her name was ripe for using. It has the familiarity of Kim/Kimberly with today’s popular BR sound found in fast-risers Aubree, Briella, Brielle and Aubrey (referenced on the Baby Name Wizard blog).

Although the bree sound is current, I suspect the -bra sound belongs more to names such as Deborah and Barbara. But combining the -bra of two generations ago with the Kim- of last generation does result in a fresh and surprising sound.

Other things that come to mind when considering the name Kimbra:

1. cobra
2. bra
3. Simba
4. limbo/limber

So for me, it’s the perfect name for a pop star: distinctive, with sexy/wild associations—and, since she’s an adult, no fears of middle school classmates repeatedly remarking on the “bra” element.

The Social Security Administration doesn’t have Kimbra in their data base for 2011, which means the name was given to four or fewer babies that year. Since Kimbra’s album appeared in North America only this year, we may see a change right away in the 2012 data. I can picture someone using it as a combination honor name for a baby’s Grandma Barbara and Aunt Kim.

What does everyone else think about the name Kimbra? Let’s have a poll over to the right. [Poll closed; see results below.]

Poll results for “Name to Consider: Kimbra” (354 votes total):

I love it! I’d want to use it! – 5 votes (1%)
I like it! I’d want to consider it! – 16 votes (5%)
I like it for someone else’s baby – 55 votes (16%)
No particular opinion – 28 votes (8%)
Slight dislike – 146 votes (41%)
Strong dislike – 104 votes (29%)