I had a dream Sunday night that I was in the hospital, in labor, expecting a baby boy, and that I just realized we hadn’t chosen a name. AHA HA HA HA HA!! AS IF! The pregnancy test stick is not even COOL before I’m making name lists! But anyway, that was the dream.

So I was thinking over possibilities. Would we use the name Oliver now, since our cat Oliver has died and the cat was the only thing stopping us from using the name last time? Would we use Frederick? But that would mean repeating an initial, and although I’m WILLING to do that for a name I MUST HAVE, I’d PREFER not to. Plus, my parents dislike the name Frederick.

So then, in the dream hospital, I thought of putting Frederick in the middle-name slot to eliminate the problems with it, and I came up with Oliver Frederick, and I like it enough that it’s making me feel a little woeful that I WON’T have another boy to name, and so I am hoping to persuade one of YOU to use it.

Delia writes:

I have a question that I am sure you have come across many times before, but I would like to hear your thoughts / your readers thoughts on it. It has to do with naming a child with the same name as one used in your social circle (or close to it). DH & I have been together for 5 years and recently decided to start trying for a baby. In our 1st year together we talked about kids and we decided back then already that if we have a son, we would call him Ethan – we both love the name, it sound good with our surname and it just felt (and still does feel) ‘right’. Fast forward to the present and we found out today that some colleagues/ friends that had a baby boy last week have named him Ethan. Now, sure, it’s not like we had a claim staked on the name and we didn’t advertise the fact that we had chosen that particular name, but it feels like if we were to now name our child the same it would be kind of odd, even be seen to be ‘copying’ them. That being said, we are not as close with this couple or other friends of theirs that we also used to socialize with as we once were and speak to or hang out with them outside of work (we all work at the same company). I am of the opinion that if we aren’t that close then it shouldn’t matter, but DH feels the name should be up for review. Should we just abandon the idea of using Ethan and go back to the drawing board, or should we stick with it even if their is a bit of the weirdness factor thrown in?

In your case, I’d say it’s pretty clear you can go right ahead and use the name. Ethan is a fairly common name, and at the very earliest the boys will be nearly a year apart, so I don’t think anyone will make a connection as they might if the name in question were Edgar. If you feel a little awk, you can spread The Story of His Name: every time you tell what his name is, you can say that when you and your husband were in your first year of marriage, before you even knew when you would have a baby, you decided on Ethan as your boy name. Tell this story with stars in your eyes, and everything’s fine: you’ve made it clear that your choice has nothing to do with anyone else’s choice.

Any tips from the rest of you? Have you been in this situation, and what did you do?

Nathasa writes:

I’m writing you for baby advice! I’m due on November 26th (Thanksgiving baby!) with my third child and second daughter. My husband and I have two other children; Joanna Aisbet and Henry Fraser. We pretty much had our list of names narrowed down about four months ago, to either Catherine, Caroline, Rebecca, Grace, or Alice. But about a month ago I suddenly discovered Gaelic names, and I’m in love with them.

So now my number one choice is Niamh (pronounced “Neeve”), with Siobhan (“Shuh-von”) and Aoife (“Eef-uh”) close behind. My husband loves the name Niamh and is totally for it. So here are my issues.

First of all, neither my husband nor I have a drop of Irish blood in us. Is that totally weird to use an Irish name? My family certainly thinks so. Both of our mothers are campaigning for one of the original five, and neither my mother nor my mother in law, (or any of my other family for that matter) likes Niamh whatsoever. Both of our parents are very involved in our childrens lives, so this is a factor for me.

Secondly, of course, we live in Maryland, not Dublin. I know that if we choose Niamh, she will have to constantly be spelling and pronouncing her name for people. I had to do that all my life (My name is Nathasa, with no “h” after the “s”, and the first “h” silent), and it wasn’t much fun.

Third, I don’t know if it really works with Joanna and Henry. When I say it out loud, it sounds nice. “Joe-ann-uh, Hen-ree, and Neev”. But that’s just me. I really don’t know if it does. Also, our last name is one syllable: Kempt (Kem-t). It sounds fine with two syllabled Joanna and Henry, but I don’t know if it really flows with one syllabled Niamh.

It seems like there are way more strikes against Niamh than for it, and we should just go back to the other finalists we’d originally picked, but we keep coming back to Niamh. We both love it, and none of the other names seems just right.

But I’m worried, with so many things not going for the name. What do you think? I’d love people’s insight – I’m really stressing.

And if not Niamh, then any other suggestions? Also, we haven’t even begun to think of a middle name, and off the top of my head, nothing sounds good with Niamh (another strike, UGH!). We don’t want it to be an Irish name, but no American names really work, that I can think of.

Please help!

Thank you so, so much.

I think that if you both love Niamh, and if you keep coming back to it despite being aware of the various issues, and if no other name seems right, that you should use it. And definitely it seems as if your parents shouldn’t make a peep after using the name Nathasa in their own baby-naming days.

Would you like the name as much if it were spelled differently? Because you could spell it Neeve or Nieve or Neve and take that issue off your list. It’s common for a name from one country to be spelled or pronounced differently when used in another country: we say Wilhelmina with a W sound even though in German it’s a V sound; the name Kieran is Irish, but in Ireland it’s Ciarán; and we use Owen instead of Eoghan. It’s a matter of translating a name from one alphabet/language to another, so that it can be spelled and pronounced.

If you do use it, several of your other options would make nice middle names: Neeve Caroline Kempt, Nieve Rebecca Kempt, Neve Catherine Kempt.

Another option is to use Niamh as the middle name, eliminating pretty much ALL the problems—well, except the one where you like the name Niamh better than all the other options. I like it best with Rebecca: Rebecca Niamh Kempt. It’s good with Caroline and Catherine, too, except that the N sounds blur together a little—not a dealbreaker, I wouldn’t think, considering how infrequently it would cause a problem.

What does everyone else think? Use Niamh or not? Spell it the Irish way or the English way? First name or middle name, and what combination?

E. writes:

I’m writing for baby-naming advice! I’m due on November 18. We already have a son, Harrison. This baby is a little girl (and our last). We didn’t decide on our son’s name until our last day in the hospital and we would like to name this little girl before getting to the hospital, but we can’t agree.

Here’s some background about our naming tastes:

I knew I wanted to call our son Harry, which we do. I know that Harry is the traditional nickname for Henry (I felt that Harry was a nickname and needed a “real” name behind it). But, Henry was way too popular in our crowd and so I went with Harrison. It isn’t quite as traditional as I would have wanted in a perfect world, but it certainly (I feel) is still traditional (even if it isn’t a William, etc.). My husband and I both go by names which are also surnames and so that is a nice similarity that Harrison has, too, not that we are requiring that of this girl’s name. We also really like the alliteration that Harrison has (our last name starts with “H“). I know that many people detest alliteration, but, at least with Harry’s name, we think it sounds quite nice. Also, I do NOT want a name that is popular (heavily used) either overall or within our particular demographic. I do not want anything trendy or that will be associated with this time. I don’t want a unique name simply for its uniqueness, but I don’t want anything too popular either. I prefer classic/traditional/timeless names.

I had had a second boy’s name picked out for years: Edward, “Teddy.” (I actually wanted Theodore, “Teddy,” for awhile, but then switched to Edward). I LOVE the nickname and the “real” name and think it matches perfectly with Harry. Of course, we’re having a girl.

Here are our respective lists of names:

My list:
Beatrice
Caroline
Catherine
Charlotte
Eleanor

His list:
Harper

My thoughts on each of the names:

Beatrice

Pros: I love this name (and saw that you were a fan of it in 2007). The traditional but not at all popular nature of the name appeals to me. How adorable would it be to send out birth announcements with a quote from Much Ado About Nothing (my favorite of Shakespeare’s plays) whose main character is a smart and sassy Beatrice? The name is ranked 833 on the social security index of names for 2008.

Cons: This name is not popular with family members that I have floated it out to. My mother feels that it is much too “Victorian” by which I suppose she means excessively frilly and/or feminine, outdated, etc (she hates the Victorian era of decorating by the way, as do I). My husband has outlawed the nickname “Trixie” (which I think is adorable) because of its illicit connotations, but by choosing the BeatriCE spelling over the BeatriX, I think I’ve eliminated this possibility anyway. Also, the only Beatrices that family members can think of are “Aunt Bea” from The Andy Griffith Show and Bea Arthur (of Golden Girls fame) not exactly the image one immediately wants to bring up. Yet, I think “Bea” would be an adorable nickname. Finally, my father noted that the most famous Harry (today anyway) is Harry Potter and the most famous Beatrice/Beatrix is Beatrix Potter and therefore I must have a strange obsession with Potter names. Interesting, but I don’t think the observation should hinder my use of the name. Finally, I’ve only recently become enamored with this name and I’m afraid that if I use it, I’ll come to regret it in the future (though I probably like it the best of all the names right now).

Caroline

Pros: It is traditional but not staid. It sounds similar to Catherine and Charlotte, but isn’t nearly as popular (in my perception).

Cons: It has been pointed out to me that a popular nickname for Caroline is Carrie. I didn’t know this, but I absolutely despise the nickname Carrie, not to mention it would be weird to have children named Harry and Carrie. Furthermore, Caroline is easily confused with Carolyn and it may be annoying to have to constantly correct people. It is ranked 94th on the SS list which isn’t too high, but certainly very much more popular than some of the other names that I’m considering.

Catherine

Pros: I’ve always like this name. I think you can’t go wrong with it. This name would have the least amount of disapproval from extended family and of the names on my list is the one that my husband likes the most.

Cons: I greatly prefer the British spelling (Catherine versus Kathryn or Katherine), but I would inevitably want to nickname her—either Cate or Catie, but I feel like these names look odd spelled with C, but that it would be odd to switch from a Catherine to a Kate or Katie. It is ranked 149th, though Katherine is 45th, Katie is 128, Kate is 139, Kathryn is 190 and Kathy is 992, so if you added all of those together I’m sure that it would be a much higher ranking.

Charlotte

Pros: Solid, traditional name but with a more fresh sound. Charlie would be a wonderful nickname for it.

Cons: I’ve loved this name for a long time and therefore was disappointed when it was used for a character name on Sex and the City. I don’t want people to think that we named our daughter after the show. Also, the name is very popular and will only continue to become more popular (I think), which is a negative in my book. (I’d prefer a less popular name, but not at the expense of kr8tif spelling!). In addition, I think it will become more popular in our demographic than in other demographics. It was ranked 87th (which is fairly high) and is on an upward trend (it has been in the top 300 since 2000, but just broke the top 100 in 2008).

Eleanor

Pros: I feel that this name is still in the traditional vein, but sounds newer (at least to my ears) than names that never fully fell out of popularity such as Elizabeth and Catherine. The –nor ending sounds strong to me. If we went with Eleanor, I would most likely nickname her Ella. It is currently ranked 256, which is much lower than some of the other names we’re considering.

Cons: I know that this name is popular in the NPR set these days (and has been for several years) along with the most common nicknames for it, Ella and Nora. However, we only know one Eleanor and she lives out of state, so though it is popular, I am aware that it isn’t anything like Jennifer in the 70s. That said, Eleanor was somewhat a late addition to the list and I haven’t had as much time to live with the name as with the C names.

Harper

Pros: It starts with H so it would have the alliteration with our last name that we liked with our son’s name. I’ll admit that I like it the best of all the feminine names that begin with the letter H. It also fits into the pattern of surname as last name that everyone else in our family has.

Cons: I’m afraid that it is too popular (at least among the people that we’ll interact with)– ESPECIALLY now that the baby name wizard herself included it in her top ten list of baby names for the year 2019 (prediction for Parents magazine). The two authors of Freakonomics listed it as a prediction for a top ten boys name in the future. I’m simply afraid that it will continue to rise in popularity and become the next Madison/X-aden, etc. It sounds too trendy to me, especially since Lisa Marie Presley just named a daughter Harper (not the kind of name-giving company I want to keep). (Other celebs with a Harper include Paul Simon and George Stephanopoulos.) Finally, since this will be our only girl there is a part of me that really wants to give her a feminine name. Last year it was only ranked 297, but it has had a quite steep rise in popularity (in 2007: 439, 2006: 508, 2005: 743, 2004: 887) which I know can often signal a future spot in the top 10.

Moreover, I’m afraid that people will think it is an homage to Harper Lee. It isn’t that I don’t like Harper Lee, it is just that I wouldn’t name a child after her. (Plus she didn’t use Harper as her name in real life, but was called by her first name Nelle.) Also, it clearly falls into the –er trend in names AND the medieval trade name category (of which I am not a fan). Finally, this is the name most likely to be disliked among extended family.

That said, my husband REALLY wanted to name our son Henry but gave in and went with Harrison. Perhaps I should let him have his Harper?

Any thoughts?

Wow, I bet you’ve never had someone write you an email this long, huh? Sorry about that. Even after we decide on a first name, then we’ll have to tackle the middle name (ack!), but I promise I won’t bother you with that one.

Generally I think people should spend more time considering more issues before choosing a baby name, but I think at this point, 2 weeks before the due date, it is time to simplify. I think I would start by considering what is most important to you: the alliteration? the uncommonness? the timelessness? the name being a surname name? how your family feels about it? what other people might think the namesake is? These are all important issues. You and your husband could each make a list ranking them. My husband and I like the ranking style where more than one thing can have the same ranking; for example:

Uncommonness 1
Timelessness 1
Family 2
Surname 3
Alliteration 3
Namesake issues 4

It sounds to me as if your wish to have a timeless/traditional name is warring with your wish to have an uncommon name that will not increase in commonness. Many names that stand the test of time are more common than not—and if they weren’t common, they wouldn’t belong to this time in addition to the other times, and so wouldn’t be timeless. And since many parents are looking for the magical mix of traditional and unusual, any name that finds that mark is likely to get more common. This can lead to tremendous disappointment, with every parent wishing the culture and the other parents hadn’t ruined their choice by making it popular.

I’m with you on wishing to avoid names that are going to spike in popularity. I think it helps to remember that there is no predicting it: you can look at trends, you can consider influences, but you’re already totally on top of that. You’re educated enough on the rankings, and now you’re at the point where you have to take a risk and choose the name you want most and hope for the best. And if the name does spike? Well, you did all you could, considering none of us can see into the future.

It seems like it might be easier if you left your family out of the discussions. Many people will say some pretty critical things during a name discussion that they would never say, think, or feel if presented with a baby and told the name—and many people who dislike a baby name on first hearing will grow to love when it becomes inextricably woven with the dear baby. Furthermore, people a generation older than the current parent generation tend to have radically different perspective on what names sound good and what names don’t. We say “Henry” and they say, “Ewwww, old mannish!” We say “Eleanor” and they say “Ewwww, old ladyish!” Just as THEIR parents said, “Jennifer? I’ve never heard of it! Why can’t you use a normal name like Barbara?”

My top recommendation is Helena. It’s got Shakespeare, it’s got ancient, it’s got feminine, it’s got alliteration, it’s got uncommon (500s/600s). I’m pronouncing it heh-LAY-nah, in which case you’ve got the nice nickname Lena (LAY-nah). Or it can also be pronounced like Helen with an “ah” on the end: HEL-len-ah. I like it with Harrison/Harry, and I also like it with the middle name Harper and think HHH would be an excellent monogram.

Another H name I’m fond of is Henrietta. Since you both liked Henry, I wonder if you’d like the way-less-common girl version? It’s very uncommon yet completely familiar. It has the cute nicknames Hennie or Hettie or Nettie, or sassier nicknames Etta or Henri or Ree.

I hope you will pardon the light posting around here. Our baby gate broke, and we don’t want to replace it when our youngest child is already 2.5 years old and nearly human, so I am spending my days following him around, huge dark circles under my eyes, saying, “No, no, Henry, get off the counter. No, honey, don’t splash in the cat water. OMG PUT THAT DOWN!!!” My morning writing time, which I used to accomplish by putting on the television, is GONE.

I suppose if you were desperate, you could look at my grocery list. Or give input on newborn sleep issues.

Yeah, I know, none of that is about baby names. How about this: we can discuss a name that has recently come very strongly into my favor. It’s Sally. I know! But run it around in your mind a little bit. Imagine asking someone what their baby’s name is, and they say “Sally.” A little girl running around being cute. Sally! I think it’s super-sweet, and also should be revived as a nickname for the otherwise nicknameless Sarah/Sara.

Harry and Dawn write:

We are expecting our fourth child at the end of November. We have a girl, Eve (no middle name), a boy, Porter Cardon (both family names) and a boy, Harry William (again both family names). We don’t know the sex of the fourth child, and need to come up with something before the baby arrives (with the last one it took us three weeks AFTER he was born to decide on the name!) Our last name is Terrill (pronounced like Merrill with at “T”). If it is a girl we wont have a middle name but if it’s a boy we would like to have a middle name. We have not come up with much but here is what we have so far. If it is a girl we both like the name Wren, my wife likes the name Isla. We both are wondering if Wren is feminine enough for a girl. Do you like the name Wren? Have you heard of any other Wrens? We don’t want a name that is too popular but we don’t want something weird. For a boy my wife likes the name True (I’m not 100% convinced on that one, not sure if it sounds like a real name or not.) My wife also likes the name Holden (she has not read Catcher in the Rye, I on the other hand have, and don’t care for it as much.) So we really don’t have much, any suggestions for names that would go with Eve, Porter and Harry would be greatly appreciated.

The name Wren falls into a very specific category for me: Names I Think are Wonderful in Writing, But Not as Much When Said Aloud. The word is beautiful, and I like the bird association—but “Ren” is not as pretty a sound to my ear, and has more of an association with Ren and Stimpy. With your surname, too, I dislike it: Ren Terrill. I’m imagining her introducing herself and the other person being unable to make sense of the name.

I have many of the same objections to the name True: beautiful in writing, great concept, but not as good said aloud–and likely to be misheard as Drew. Furthermore, I think the name True seems too feminine with strongly masculine names like Porter and Harry. It seems like it would be better for the middle-name slot, as with the actress Kirstie Alley’s son William True.

However, many, many people would vehemently disagree with me on both these names. And I have a very different opinion of more established word/concept names such as Rose and Hope: there’s no reason either are any nicer on the ear than Wren or True, but because they’re well-established as names, they come to my ear as Names instead of as Sounds. Wren and True, still rare as names, come to my ear as sounds.

If this were your first girl, we would talk a little about middle names, and I would have emailed you to ask for more information about why you didn’t want to use one. Since you already have a no-middle-name girl, however, my sense of consistency kicks in.

Suggestions for a girl name:

Audrey
Claire
Elise
Hope
Iris
Jane
June
Lila
Nina
Phoebe
Rose

My favorite is Jane. I think Eve and Jane are great sister names. I also like Eve and Rose.

Your first two sons both have family names. I don’t know what names are available, but that’s where I’d look if this is a third son. Perhaps you can find one more family name and then use True or Holden as the middle name. If the barrel of family names has been thoroughly scraped, then here are a few possibilities to consider (I’m avoiding anything ending in S, to keep from the unfortunate sound-blend STerrill):

Brogan
Coleman
Colton
Drew
Hudson
Jameson
Landon
Sullivan
Weston
Wilson
Wyatt

I like Wilson best. Porter, Harry, and Wilson. I also like Drew.

Caroline writes:

We are pregnant with our first baby girl, and due on or about November 21st, 2009. The one thing that we know for sure is that her middle name will be “Rose.” This is due to the fact that my maiden name was a very complicated Polish surname that had something close to “Rose” in the pronounciation. It would be too cruel to give this baby the actual surname as a middle name, so we’ve decided to use “Rose” instead, as a shout out to my side of the family. Therefore, the baby’s first name must go with “Rose” as a middle name. We have a very common last name, “Thompson.”

Our favorites so far are:

Maggie Rose Thompson
Winifred “Winnie” Rose Thompson
Gwendolyn Rose Thompson (I love this, but don’t like the nickname “Gwen,” can I get “Winnie” as a nickname out of it?)

I guess we like uncommon names, and apparently old fashioned names. If it’s a BIG name (like Winifred) we like the possibilty of a cute nickname coming out of it. I LOVE “Winnie.” Any other suggestions?

Maybe “Lynnie” as a nickname for Gwendolyn? Adorable. (Though an older Lynnie/Winnie might still choose to go by Gwen.) Some more uncommon, old-fashioned names with cute nicknames:

Eleanor Rose Thompson (Ellie, Lenni)
Elsa Rose Thompson
Lydia Rose Thompson (Liddy)
Meredith Rose Thompson (Merrie)
Millicent Rose Thompson (Milly)
Virginia Rose Thompson (Ginny)
Willa Rose Thompson

From my list, my favorite is Willa, a name that is complete in itself while still having the cute-nickname appeal of Winnie.

From your list, my favorite is Winifred.

Let’s have a poll over to the right. [Poll closed; see results below.]

Poll results (197 votes total):
Maggie: 30 votes, roughly 15%
Winifred: 23 votes, roughly 12%
Gwendolyn: 35 votes, roughly 18%
Eleanor: 16 votes, roughly 8%
Elsa: 10 votes, roughly 5%
Lydia: 16 votes, roughly 8%
Meredith: 11 votes, roughly 6%
Millicent: 8 votes, roughly 4%
Virginia: 13 votes, roughly 7%
Willa: 35 votes, roughly 18%

Melanie writes:

so far we have

zoe madeline jane myatt (jane is a family name)
tessa lousie myatt (louise is a family name)
samuel “tate” myatt (samuel is a family name)

i am the one who chooses names like zoe, tessa and tate, and i am looking for something else along these lines for a girl or boy (i’m not sure yet if we will find out what we are having).

my husband loves, loves, loves using family names. some that are left: lucky, carter, james, dirk, lily and anne.

what i’m looking for is something that will sound good with the three names we have already AND a family name. i have an affinity for the southern two-name thing (my friend has “anna riley” and “india grace” and i love those but obviously, they are taken!).

i am happy to take any and all suggestions!

For a girl:

Ellery Anne
Iris Anne
Lily Anne
Lily Noelle
Kimball Anne
Macy Anne
Sadie Anne
Shelby Anne
Willa Anne

For a boy:

Carter Finn
Carter James
Carter Zane
James Hart
James Keane
James Wade
Wade Carter

Danielle writes:

I love your blog and am hoping for help in naming our second son due to arrive November 10th.
My name is Danielle and my husband’s name is Caleb. Our last name begins with a B and ends with O.
We have an 18 month old son, Brody. His middle name is Timothy after my father.
I was hesitant to name him Brody because of our last name beginning with a B,
but my husband loved it and now I can’t imagine him being anything but Brody.
We love names that are unique without sounding too crazy. The main problem we are having is that we have a handful of names we like but nothing we love…yet.

Here is the very short list of names we both like:

• Foster (I would say this is our number one name right now…how do you feel about it?)
• Grayson (We both love it but I am hesitant to use it as I know it is now being used for girls as well)
• Levi (I love it, hubby doesn’t at all)

To get a better feel for names we like here are some names that we liked but for various reasons are not going to be in the running….. Asher, Abram, Trey, Gage and Roman.

As for a middle name…We would like to use David (my father in laws name), Caleb, or Anderson.
What do you think the best combination is? And what other first name suggestions do you or any other readers have that you think we would like? I am ready to hear a new name to fall in love with!

I like Foster, and particularly I like Foster Anderson. But the initials are FAB. And Foster Caleb and Foster David both sound choppy to me, as if Foster is a title along the lines of Mister or Brother.

I also like Grayson. I’ve heard, too, that it’s being used for girls. I don’t know if this is a Worrying Trend, like when the name Mackenzie went full-on Girl Name, or a Clear Minority thing where the name will occasionally used for girls but will still be considered a Boy Name. I don’t have a favorite middle name of the three options. Grayson Anderson is double -son and also spells GAB, and, again, Grayson Caleb and Grayson David both sound choppy to me, though fine.

I think the trouble with the middle name options is that Caleb and David are both strongly first-nameish (two syllables, emphasis on the first syllable) and sound odd in the middle name slot. The problem is accentuated by the very different style of first names: Andrew David would sound okay to me, but Foster David sounds odd. Anderson fits much better with the style of first names, but it spells a word with many first-name consonant choices (CAB, DAB, FAB, GAB, JAB, etc.). I kept thinking of first name possibilities such as Turner, and then getting stuck: it spells TAB with the name that sounds good with it, and it clunks with both David and Caleb.

Here are some more possibilities to consider:

Archer Anderson
Cason David
Carson David
Coleman David
Harris Anderson
Keegan Anderson
Lawson David
Lincoln Caleb
Miller Anderson
Wilson David

I think my favorite is Archer Anderson. I just really like the sound of it.

Holly writes:

My husband and I are expecting our second daughter on October 21, and we are having a really hard time with the name. After months and months of discussions (or arguments…whatever), we agree on Grace for a first name. Our last name is one syllable and ends with “lyn”. Our other daughter’s name is Abigail Marie, and we call her Abby.

Middle names we have rejected, even though we like them a lot:

Evelyn (too rhymey with our last name)
Amelia (don’t like the initials)

Since Grace and our last name are pretty short, I think the middle name should be at least two syllables.

What do you think? Any and all help appreciated!

I love the rhythm of Grace Amelia with a one-syllable surname. If you love it except for the initials problem, you could use Emelia. Some more combinations with a similar four-syllable rhythm:

Grace Cordelia
Grace Elizabeth
Grace Olivia
Grace Penelope
Grace Veronica
Grace Victoria

And here are a few 3-syllable options:

Grace Mikayla
Grace Samantha
Grace Savannah
Grace Sophia

More options, everyone!