{"id":9863,"date":"2014-06-25T07:31:23","date_gmt":"2014-06-25T11:31:23","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/?p=9863"},"modified":"2014-06-25T07:31:23","modified_gmt":"2014-06-25T11:31:23","slug":"adult-middle-name-challenge-anna-_______","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/2014\/06\/25\/adult-middle-name-challenge-anna-_______\/","title":{"rendered":"Adult Middle Name Challenge: Anna _______"},"content":{"rendered":"

Kelly writes:<\/p>\n

Hi, I would really love some help with this.<\/p>\n

I’m in the process of changing my name but I’m feeling a bit stuck and was hoping for some suggestions. My name is currently Kelly and I have a European surname my dad is from Germany.<\/p>\n

Kelly has never felt right and most people will say after getting to know me that I don’t look like a Kelly and people tend to forget my name. I was meant to be named something more European but my mother didn’t feel happy with this as she was very anglo so I got called Kelly. My mother abandoned me when I was 9 so I don’t feel any ties to her and her name for me. I have disliked my name for a very long time 20+ years and I feel compelled to finally change it after using the name on non important things for some time and feel that it is the right fit for me.<\/p>\n

My middle name is Anne so I’m changing my name to Anna which is a nice version of Anne. I’m telling people that I’m going by my middle name and it feels right and they don’t seem to question me but now I’m stuck as to what to use for a middle name. Does Ann sound strange? I was thinking about using a y name as I like the way that it looks as an initial I will be using my initials a lot with my work. I’m in a creative industry so I feel free to do what ever I I choose without much question but I don’t want to find myself feeling regretful after I change it officially. Like a tattoo that is though to be so interesting now but later on what on earth was I thinking!<\/p>\n

My most common reaction from people when I tell them that I’m going by my middle name is ok cool, or great or good on you it suits you but what are you going to use for your middle name? I have thought of Yasmina, Ann, Aquila after a family member but other than that I’m lost. I don’t want to keep the name Kelly at all. I don’t like the letter k very much.<\/p>\n

I’m very visual and I like the look of O’s A’s Y’s and W’s. Should I leave the Anne so i’m not changing my name too much or do you think its better to say while you are going through he process give yourself a new middle name as well, why not!<\/p>\n

I would really love to hear some suggestions. It’s very different choosing names as an adult that for a child so much easier to sound contrived and get it wrong.<\/p>\n

kind regards<\/p>\n

Kelly (at the moment)<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

 <\/p>\n

I’m glad you specified that you didn’t want to keep the Kelly part of the name at all, because my very first thought was to switch the first and middle names: Anna\/Anne\/Ann Kelly, there, done, let’s go out for doughnuts!<\/p>\n

If I were you, I think I would start by having a conversation with your dad. If he would have preferred to name you something more European, he may very well still remember what the contenders were. For adult name changes, I like the idea of choosing something else off the parents’ lists—something that could actually have been the person’s given name if things had gone a little differently. Are there relatives your parents might have wanted to name you after? What Y-names and W-names does your dad like? I think it might feel more like your Real Name if your dad helps choose it.<\/p>\n

I would also go to the Social Security Administration’s website<\/a> (if you are from the United States; if you are from another country, I’d look at that country’s name data), scroll down to the “Popular Names by Birth Year” tab, enter your birth year, and go down the list. Write down any that appeal to you or have meaning for you.<\/p>\n

I’m having trouble figuring out if you’re asking if you should keep Ann\/Anne as your middle name when you change your first name to Anna: i.e., Anna Ann. If that’s what you’re asking, I do think that seems strange and that something else should be chosen.<\/p>\n

My guess is that you’ll be most content with your name change if you feel like there was a reason to choose each name. If the conversation with your dad isn’t possible or doesn’t lead anywhere helpful, I’d look for other significant influences in your life. Do you have any role models in your field—people who began or changed the industry, or whose work inspired you to join it? Any favorite authors or artists or actors or politicians or activists? An aunt or grandmother you were particularly close to? Any women who stepped into your life when your mom stepped out? Any family surnames that would make good middle names? Any names that crop up again and again among the women in your family?<\/p>\n

This next suggestion depends on how the rest of your mom’s family has been. If for example they were horrified by your mother’s behavior and have been very active and involved in your life, I might suggest looking for a name from that side of the family, since your surname is from your dad’s side of the family.<\/p>\n

When you have some finalists, I’d do the Naming Story Test: because you’re changing it yourself, it feels even more important that the naming story sound right. As you say, it’s easy to end up sounding contrived. Something like “Anna was my middle name, and Jean is my grandmother’s name” works. So does something like “Anna was my middle name, and then I chose Michelle for my Aunt Michelle who did so much for me.” Or “Anna was my middle name, and Weiss is a family name.”<\/p>\n

Another option is to have no middle name, or just an initial. It’s not very common, but I’ve encountered it often enough to be familiar with it. It would be a hassle to go through the process twice, but this would also leave things open to put a name in there later if the right one occurred to you.<\/p>\n

Without a surname to work with, it’s difficult to offer specific suggestions. But I think even with a surname I’d be at a loss: to make a list, I’d want to talk to your dad, poke around in your family tree, and so on.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Kelly writes: Hi, I would really love some help with this. I’m in the process of changing my name but I’m feeling a bit stuck and was hoping for some suggestions. My name is currently Kelly and I have a European surname my dad is from Germany. Kelly has never felt right and most people […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-9863","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3iyiG-2z5","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9863","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=9863"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9863\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":9864,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/9863\/revisions\/9864"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=9863"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=9863"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=9863"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}