{"id":15658,"date":"2021-12-01T10:54:26","date_gmt":"2021-12-01T14:54:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/?p=15658"},"modified":"2022-01-18T08:10:59","modified_gmt":"2022-01-18T12:10:59","slug":"baby-girl-or-boy-engel-sibling-to-griffin","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/2021\/12\/01\/baby-girl-or-boy-engel-sibling-to-griffin\/","title":{"rendered":"Baby Girl or Boy Engel, Sibling to Griffin"},"content":{"rendered":"

Swistle,<\/p>\n

I stumbled across your website tonight and loved the type of advice you gave people regarding naming their children. I\u2019m hoping you can do the same for my husband and I.<\/p>\n

We are pregnant with our second, and likely last, child. The pregnancy has been very high risk since early on, so mentally my husband and I are just now able to take the time to think of names. Delivery is right around the corner due to preterm labor concerns and I\u2019m panicking that I don\u2019t yet have a name picked out for this little one!<\/p>\n

We live in the US. Our last name sounds like Engel but is spelled differently (rhymes with \u201csingle.\u201d) Our first born\u2019s name is Griffin Michael. Everyone in the family\u2019s middle name starts with an M, which is an odd little thing we\u2019d like to keep going. My husband\u2019s middle name is Michael, just like my son. The gender of this baby is unknown and we plan to keep it that way until delivery. We are pretty set on the name Blair for a girl. I have always liked it and surprisingly my husband approved instantly. If this little one is a girl, we would like to use Marie as it is my middle name too.<\/p>\n

The main issue we have is with the boy name. It has been the hardest! We had a very short list of names that we enjoyed, we narrowed down, and we ultimately settled on Beckett Matthew. At this point I have no other contenders, but I go through waves of liking and disliking this name frequently. My husband seems to as well. When we chose our son Griffin\u2019s name we liked that it was different but not too different, easily pronounced and recognized, and had a cute nickname of Fin (which honestly rarely gets used). I love the idea of last names as first names and want to keep that going with the little one too.<\/p>\n

We liked Beckett for all of these reasons, but worry that it is even less popular and maybe a little too different. We really like the name Beck, but feel the single syllable clashes with our last name. When I get in my disapproval phase of the name, it feels to me like we are almost trying *too* hard with a name rather than choosing one that is well established but still less than popular. I also can envision a little old man Griffin but not necessarily a little old man Beckett. I sometimes worry that with delivery being so close, I am choosing Beckett for the sake of choosing a name (although we narrowed it down before preterm labor was a concern). While we are keeping the name choices a surprise until birth, I did confide in my younger sister who approved of Beckett Matthew. I\u2019m afraid older relatives may not get it.<\/p>\n

I do like Beckett most days, but I think I just need reassurance or opinions from a third party before I really sell into it. I\u2019m also open to other suggestions as well that maybe I haven\u2019t already thought of. I appreciate any help that you can give me.<\/p>\n

Thank you!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

 <\/p>\n

Since your girl-name choice is one syllable, and so is the nickname of your first child, it doesn’t seem to me as if the problem with the nickname Beck could be that the one syllable doesn’t work with your surname. But I’m curious to know what the issue IS. It could be that something about the specific sounds of Beck feels wrong with your surname (Beck may feel sharper or more abrupt than the softer sounds of Fin or Blair); or it could be a symptom of you not wanting to choose the name Beckett and looking for reasons not to choose it; or it could be anxious feelings and cold feet as the naming deadline approaches.<\/p>\n

Other concerns I think you can toss out: (1) that older relatives may not get it (this is common, and in most cases I think needs to be ignored for the sake of normal name-popularity cycles); (2) that it is difficult to picture an old man named Beckett (by the time the Becketts are old, I am confident it will seem perfectly natural—and if it doesn’t, it won’t matter at all); (2) that it is too different (it feels familiar and not out-there to me, even though I don’t think I know anyone named Beckett).<\/p>\n

Since you would like to consider some other options, my first suggestion is Bennett. It is quite similar to Beckett in several ways, but it has a softer sound, and you may prefer the warmer, softer nickname Ben. Bennett Engel; Griffin and Bennett; Fin and Ben.<\/p>\n

My second suggestion is Everett. Again, we are working with some similar name elements, and it’s a surname name, but it has a softer sound I think you might like, and I can definitely picture a little old man named Everett even now. Everett Engel; Griffin and Everett.<\/p>\n

(At this point I would like to just make sure we have all already realized that the -t ending with your surname forms the word Tingle. I am assuming, since you have Beckett as your finalist, that this is okay with you—but JUST IN CASE it is something (1) that has escaped your notice AND (2) that you are not keen on, this seems like the last possible moment to bring it up.)<\/p>\n

My third suggestion, if you have the energy for this and no one would blame you if you did not, is to start a new list for names that do not meet your preferences but you like them anyway. For example: names that are not surname names, names that may not be as easily pronounced as you’d prefer, names that are more or less popular than you had in mind—just an absolute No Rules brainstorm list. Even if you were not likely stopping at two children, my feeling is that after the naming process is complete, almost no one gives even one fig, let alone two, about whether all the names coordinate to the same set of preferences. If this time you go for a non-surname name, or a name that could be mispronounced, or a name that’s more common than you’d prefer—well, it’s all just FINE!<\/p>\n

And especially if it is also a name you feel pretty sure about, a name that makes your hearts sing, etc. Maybe such a name doesn’t exist (for boy names especially, I found I had to make my goal “a name I feel warmly satisfied with” rather than “a name I love”); but if you CAN find a name you love (or at least feel more warmly satisfied with), I think in the long run that’s going to make you happier than reflecting on the ways the two kids’ names line up preferences-wise (though that kind of thing CAN also give significant satisfaction, so it’s win-win here).<\/p>\n

I’d like to get this posted as soon as possible, since time is short and I’ve already kept this waiting for several days, so I may come back to add to this list of additional suggestions, but here it is real quick:<\/p>\n

Calvin
\nDarian
\nDavis (makes “single” with surname)
\nElliot (makes “tingle” with surname)
\nHarvey
\nJasper
\nLouis (makes “single” with surname)
\nNathan
\nNolan (kind of a lot of N with the surname)
\nOliver
\nSimon
\nTheodore
\nWesley
\nWilson<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Name update:<\/strong><\/p>\n

Swistle,<\/p>\n

We wanted to update you and let you know that we chose Bennett Matthew! We could not be happier as his name fits him perfectly!<\/p>\n

You were totally right that Beckett was just too harsh sounding (although we didn\u2019t know that\u2019s why we didn\u2019t like it until you suggested it). We started by making a whole new list with no rules and still came back to Bennett.<\/p>\n

Thank you so much for your kind words and suggestions!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Swistle, I stumbled across your website tonight and loved the type of advice you gave people regarding naming their children. I\u2019m hoping you can do the same for my husband and I. We are pregnant with our second, and likely last, child. The pregnancy has been very high risk since early on, so mentally my […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-15658","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-name-update"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3iyiG-44y","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15658","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=15658"}],"version-history":[{"count":5,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15658\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15710,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/15658\/revisions\/15710"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=15658"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=15658"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=15658"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}