{"id":14853,"date":"2020-07-28T08:23:18","date_gmt":"2020-07-28T12:23:18","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/?p=14853"},"modified":"2022-04-13T21:26:29","modified_gmt":"2022-04-14T01:26:29","slug":"middle-name-challenge-baby-boy-henry-______-myth-with-an-s","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/2020\/07\/28\/middle-name-challenge-baby-boy-henry-______-myth-with-an-s\/","title":{"rendered":"Middle Name Challenge: Baby Boy Henry ______ Myth-with-an-S"},"content":{"rendered":"

Hi Swistle!<\/p>\n

My husband and I are expecting our first baby – a boy due on September 13th! Our last name is a common name that sounds like Myth but starts with an S. We are set on the name Henry for his first name – it\u2019s a name that both my husband and I have loved for a long time. We plan to have 2 or 3 children.<\/p>\n

Our dilemma comes when trying to choose his middle name. We have three options – David, Robert, or Thomas.<\/p>\n

David is my dad\u2019s name and I would love to honor him. He is a wonderful man and we have always been very close. It makes me happy to think of my son being named after him. The only thing holding me back from using it is the first name Henry. Henry David. Does it instantly make you think of Henry David Thoreau? Will everyone make that association and comment on it? Does it matter? My husband doesn\u2019t think it\u2019s an issue.<\/p>\n

Robert honors many great men from both sides of our family – it\u2019s my dad\u2019s middle name, my grandpa\u2019s name, my brother\u2019s name, my husband\u2019s grandpa\u2019s name, and my husband\u2019s brother\u2019s middle name. This one almost seems like a no brainer.<\/p>\n

Thomas is my husband\u2019s name and I would also love for our little boy to be named after his dad. I love the name Henry Thomas.<\/p>\n

I am torn. Do any of the three options stick out to you as the best or obvious choice? Does one of them sound the best with the name Henry? Should we save the middle name David for another possible son in the future?<\/p>\n

Thanks in advance for your help!<\/p>\n

Caroline<\/p><\/blockquote>\n

 <\/p>\n

I had a similar issue with my last baby: three great middle names to choose from, all good solid names and all honor names, and nothing really standing out as Best. Whenever I couldn’t sleep, I would think about the three possible names and wonder which one was the Right decision.<\/p>\n

The main thing that helped me was realizing that because all three were great\/solid\/honor names, there was no WRONG decision, either. I think that’s the case here, too: all three choices are great names, good solid names, good honor names. Also, this is your first baby, and you are planning more children, so you may very well have chances to use the other honor names.<\/p>\n

I do think of Henry David Thoreau if I hear “Henry David,” though not in a shocked, how-could-they-have-used-those-two-names-together kind of way, just in a mild familiar literary way. A vote for “yes, I hear it, but I don’t think it matters.” So for me the severity of this issue depends on a combination of two things: (1) how much you mind if some people think mildly of Henry David Thoreau and (2) how often you think you think you will say “Henry David.” Will it be on the birth announcements, and then the next time you hear it will be at his high school graduation? Or are you a family that tends to call people by first\/middles? Actually, I’m changing my mind as I write, because I notice that the more times I write\/read “Henry David,” the less I think of Thoreau. I think even if you were a family that commonly called people by first\/middle, the association would quickly dissipate. If I encountered a kid who went by Henry David, I would think very mildly of Thoreau, and then I wouldn’t give it much\/any thought after that. Anyway, the short version of this paragraph is I think all three names should still be in the running, but I also see the merit of the plan of saving David for a future boy not named Henry.<\/p>\n

I think what I would do if I were you is go through a series of exercises to try to tease out my own preferences.<\/p>\n

Exercise One: Imagine each name in turn, and imagine the baby is born and you are announcing that name to the honoree(s) as you show them the dear little bundle. Which gives you the strongest feeling of excitement\/happiness to imagine the reaction?<\/p>\n

Exercise Two: Imagine each name in turn, and imagine that you knew in advance that this was in fact your only chance to use one of these three names. Which gives you the strongest feeling of unhappiness to imagine not using?<\/p>\n

Exercise Three: Imagine filling out all the forms that will need to be filled out in the early years of this baby’s life: forms for health insurance, for a Social Security card, for the pediatrician’s office, for daycare\/preschool registration. Imagine you are writing his first\/middle\/last: which gives you the strongest feeling of satisfaction to imagine writing?<\/p>\n

Exercise Four: Assuming you’ll have the chance to use more than one, do you have any feelings about which name it would be nicest to use FIRST? Perhaps you like the idea of the firstborn son having his dad’s name as a middle. Or perhaps, if the surname is from your husband’s side, you like the idea of using a middle name from only your side of the family, to set up a pattern of balanced honor names. Or perhaps for the first baby it’s pleasing to imagine honoring the widest possible number of people from both sides of the family, for greatest all-around rejoicing.<\/p>\n

Exercise Five: Are any of the three names a name you might want to use as a first name later on? They’re all so nice with Henry: Henry and David, Henry and Robert, Henry and Thomas. If for example you might want to name a future son David, then you could use Henry Thomas this time and plan to use David Robert next time.<\/p>\n

Exercise Six: Do any of the three names rule out using either of the other two? For example, if you use Robert this time, does it make you feel as if your dad has already been honored, so you don’t want to use David for a future baby?<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

If it were me, I would be most torn between David and Robert, I think because Thomas feels to me like it’s more usable for any child and doesn’t have to be THIS time (and the “dad’s name as firstborn son’s middle name” tradition is so familiar to me, it feels fresher if it’s NOT the firstborn son); and because it was so much fun for me to announce honor names, and Thomas is the only one that lacks that fun surprise for the honorees.<\/p>\n

I have gone back and forth between thinking I’d choose David and thinking I’d choose Robert. I like both options very, very much. I love a good strong one-honoree honor name—but I also love the idea that Robert is a much-used family name on both sides of the family (and slightly more on your side, which helps with balance). IF IT WOULDN’T MAKE YOU FEEL AS IF YOU COULDN’T USE DAVID LATER ON, I think if it were me I would use Robert this time, and save David for a child not named Henry. But I would say my preference is based mostly on my own response to Exercise Four, combined with the tiniest hesitation about Thoreau. However, if you were to write later that you had used Henry David, my heart would leap up just as much: the two names are neck-and-neck for me, just a different set of very pleasing advantages for each.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Name update:<\/strong><\/p>\n

Hi Swistle,<\/p>\n

I apologize it has taken me so long to send this update. We really appreciated your input and all of the comments from your readers. Our son Henry Robert was born and his name suits him perfectly! If we ever have another boy, his middle name will be David.<\/p>\n

Thanks again!<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Hi Swistle! My husband and I are expecting our first baby – a boy due on September 13th! Our last name is a common name that sounds like Myth but starts with an S. We are set on the name Henry for his first name – it\u2019s a name that both my husband and I […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":true,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[3,7],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-14853","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-name-update","category-reference"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3iyiG-3Rz","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack-related-posts":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14853","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=14853"}],"version-history":[{"count":8,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14853\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":15838,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/14853\/revisions\/15838"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=14853"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=14853"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.swistle.com\/babynames\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=14853"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}