Chaperons

I was filling out a field trip permission slip and writing the accompanying check, and something was bugging me that bugs me every time: at our school, the parents who act as chaperons on field trips have to pay for their own tickets.

That seems so unfair to me. I can’t chaperon right now, and if I could I wouldn’t want to because it seems like a huge and boring and stressful duty (not to mention expensive for those parents who also help by driving), and so I really appreciate it that other parents are willing to. Those parents are helping the school, and the school NEEDS them to help in order to take the field trip, but the school can’t pay their $8 admission ticket to some historical site? That seems wrong.

So what I did was, I wrote a check for my child’s ticket, and I wrote a separate check to sponsor one chaperon. Then I reconsidered: that would put the teacher in a tricky situation, because which chaperon will she choose, and that’s unfair to the other chaperons. I took the check out, planning to contact the teacher and ask what would be best.

But now I am thinking a little bigger. I’m considering contacting someone in administration instead. Because what makes more sense than “one parent writes one check for one chaperon” is for the field trip forms to always contain an option to sponsor a chaperon. I get a little twinge (along with a little rush of guilty relief) every time I check the “I will not be able to chaperon” box, and I’ll bet other parents do too, so that seems like the perfect moment for us to see a “I would like to sponsor a chaperon” checkbox. The money donated could then be divided among the chaperons, so that they get at least a discounted ticket—and possibly there would even be extra money, which could be put toward future field trips.

46 thoughts on “Chaperons

  1. Becky

    I think that is a FABULOUS idea. Like you said, I’m sure there are many parents who can’t/don’t want to chaperon, but would be happy to sponsor the parents who do. And if not, the chaperons aren’t any worse off than they are now, but if it worked how appreciative they would be!

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  2. Marie Green

    Great idea- I love that you think in terms of helping the parents that are already donating their time.

    Another idea- the PTO at our kids’ elementary school pays for the chaperons’ tickets. You could ask them for a donation… it seems like our PTO runs on a small budget, but ALSO like they have enough $$ to do things like this. Then there wouldn’t be any administrative needs- no one to track the sponsored chaperons and keep track of the money and divide it up. The PTO writes one check for ALL chaperons/field trip and DONE. (Of course, parents can always donate to the PTO or participate in fundraisers…)

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  3. LoriD

    That’s a really great idea. I get that same twinge of guilt everytime I check off “no”, but would be quite willing to buy my way out of the guilt. :-)

    OR – if the trip is $8 a person and they need 3 chaperons, assuming about 20 kids in the class… have each kid pay $9.20.

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  4. nicole

    That is a great idea! I’ve never been bothered by having to pay when I am able to chaperon a trip, but it would be great to have it sponsored too. I might see if that can be done at our school.

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  5. GinaAnn

    I love the idea of having a box for sponsoring! It relieves a bit of the guilt and doesn’t make chaperoning seem like such a chore, I’m sure, to the parents who volunteer!

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  6. Tess

    I love this, because while I’m rarely able to commit TIME to stuff like this, I’m pretty much always willing to commit MONEY.

    To Each According to Her Abilities! Yay!

    Reply
  7. divrchk

    My kids’ school is the same way. I always chaperon and am always annoyed that I have to pay to have a miserable day! If they made each kid’s cost an extra 50 cents or dollar, or take it out of the PTA fundraising, the cost would be free to the chaperon.

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  8. Shannon

    Maybe this is a total asshat thing to say, but have I gone crazy? I thought chaperone was spelled with an “e” at the end but no one else is spelling it that way in the comments. You might want to make sure you have the correct spelling before sending letters to the school administration. :)

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  9. Suzannah

    Hmmm – that’s an interesting perspective. I’m a teacher, and our parents are CUT-THROAT, trying to get those chaperon(e) spots. We have to draw names out of a hat, then if they go on one trip, we try to let other parents go on the others. We usually charge parents half price. I never thought of parents feeling guilty about not going – I’m always glad to have parents come, but totally understand that some can’t or wouldn’t to spend their day on a school bus full of crazies. :)

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  10. Jess

    That is a great idea! I am now preemptively getting annoyed at them for coming up with stupid excuses not to adopt it, which they haven’t even DONE yet. Are you really going to present it to them? (I assume not by phone…) If so, I hope they adopt it, because it’s a brilliant plan.

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  11. carrie

    I’m constantly amazed by your kind and thoughtful (and brilliant!) suggestions.

    As a member of our PTA board and chronic over-volunteer now that both girls are in school, I think this is yet another idea of yours that I’m going to steal. We also pay when we go as a chaperone, and I think many would love to sponsor someone else doing the stressful day. But also we always have extra money in the PTA budget that could easily cover the couple hundred bucks it would take for all the field trips in our school.

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  12. Anonymous

    I love this idea. My 5th grader this year has a big overnight field trip which will cost $200 person. Yes, they want chaperones and they want them to pay $200, too. Which means I would have to pay $400 to go on this trip with my son.

    I don’t mind paying the $8 or $10 ones, but for the big one, it really seemed like there ought to be a way for the chaperones to get at least a cut rate!

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  13. janet

    Do they know how many chaperones they need? I’m assuming that the number of chaperones needed is directly proportional to the number of children going on the trip. Why couldn’t they divide the cost of a chaperone amongst the children who are going?

    Like, 10 kids need 2 chaperones. The trip is $8/person, each child on the trip is charged an additional $1.60 and the chaperones are covered. Of course, the chaperones will still be paying a part of their costs, but it wouldn’t be as onerous. No?

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  14. denese

    Oh you. I love coming here and reading about your thoughts…you discuss things I know I’ll fret over later. My daughter is only 2 but yes, I already wonder about school stuff like this.

    I went to three different elementary schools but only know how one school’s field trip fee situation worked: each kid(‘s parent) was charged a little more than the actual admission ticket or cost of whatever the hell we were doing, and the overage covered chaperones’ admission, bus driver, gas, etc. If there was leftover money, it was put into the class fund for either the next field trip or an end-of-year party. I only know about this one school because my teacher there was the only one in my entire schooling experience my mom liked enough to help, plus at the time my sister had just started full-day kindergarten so I think my mom was crazy with freedom. She learned the hard way that she is not the chaperoning type.

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  15. Nolita

    What a lovely idea! I don’t know if my daughter’s school makes the chaperones pay for stuff like this but if they do I am going to use your suggestion. Thanks for sharing and I hope your day/week has gotten better…you deserve it with all the spreading around of good vibes (and deals) that you do!

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  16. Tara

    I love this idea. I would also like the option to help sponsor CHILDREN who might not otherwise get to go on the field trip–we live in a school district that has everything from pretty well-to-do families, to those who are truly scraping by (if that), and I’m sure that for some families, it’s not a given that the child(ren) will be able to go on every field trip.

    I have thought about asking my son’s teacher about this, and I think you’ve given me the kick in the pants I needed to actually DO something about this rather than just sitting here thinking about it.

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  17. sixmilechick

    I love this idea! I work full-time and can always be a chaperon. I do try to go at least once a year. But I would gladly donate for others. Brilliant idea!

    I liked the idea of PTO paying too. I may suggest that to ours.

    Thanks!

    Reply
  18. Amy --- Just A Titch

    I used to be a teacher and I loved it when parents would include admission for a kid or chaperon besides their own—there were always a few kiddos who couldn’t pay and while I usually tried to cover them out of my own pocket, I couldn’t always do so. Great idea, truly.

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  19. Ashley

    Good idea! I think you’d probably have more volunteers all around if they thought that they might get a little help with the cost. We lived in a small town and the chaperons were always paid for, as was their gas and their meals. It only seems fair to me.

    Reply
  20. Joanne

    Seriously – you are beyond nice and smart – you are nice AND smart, and I honestly don’t know anyone else with this combination, not as much anyway. I am going to tuck this idea away in my pea brain for when my kids are old enough to go on field trips.

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  21. Jana

    Awesome idea! The guilt of not being able to chaperone gets to me every time. I’m definitely going to bring this up before the next field trip.

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  22. Anonymous

    This is a great idea! I don’t have kids yet, but my brother makes it a practice to always pay double the amount for any field trip or fee-required activity at school. He tells the teacher at the beginning of the year that it’s to sponsor a child who may not have the money. He does the same with school supplies– he just buys a ton of whatever is on the list and on sale, and gives it to the teacher at the beginning of the year.

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  23. Allison

    That’s weird that they don’t pay for the chaperones. We are usually so desperate for other adults to come that we always pay their way in. The 7th grade at my school goes to Carowinds (this big, DUMB amusement park that I hate) at the end of the school year and we never make the parents pay to get in.

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  24. Carolyn

    I had no idea that is how the system worked (how appalling!) and I think your idea is brilliant! It is so great when parents can chaperon, but it makes even more sense for people who can’t be there in person to help out those who can so it doesn’t become a burden. Great idea!

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  25. d e v a n

    Awesome idea! I recently experienced this for the first time, as d is getting ready to go on his first field trip. I couldn’t chaperon since you can’t take other kids.
    Our school wants chaperons to pay too; it would have cost us $20 for ME and HIM to go on the field trip, when I can take my entire – 6 person- family for $40. Hmm. (He still costs $12. You’d think it would be cheaper.)

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  26. Swistle

    Clarabella- RIGHT?? I went back and forth with the spell-checker: I spelled it “chaperones” and it didn’t like it, so I thought it must be “chaparoned” but it didn’t like THAT, so then I had to look it up. My dictionary has it “chaperon” with the definitions, but “chaperone” has the definition of “chaperon.”

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  27. fairydogmother

    Swistle I really, really love this idea and have always wondered why school’s don’t do this. I noticed it when I worked for a school district before & after school program in college. Then later when I was running another program I just made sure to build in entrance fees for any parent volunteers into our field trip budget. The way I convinced the board we should do this was to point out that we did not make staff pay their own way.

    Re: Shannon’s comment: It is both — “chaperon” and “chaperone” are both correct, so Swistle should use whichever she prefers (or whichever one the school uses).

    Reply
  28. g~

    We had guidelines for our field trips: (take into consideration that I was in elementary school)
    1) It had to cost a reasonable amount for the average student’s family to be able to afford.
    2) We could NEVER charge any more than the actual cost of the trip. The thought here was that it was not other families’ responsibility to pay for a child’s field trip but we could graciously accept extra donations but we could not ask or pressure.
    3) We could not prohibit a student from going on a field trip because they couldn’t pay–the school had to use extra funds to cover those who couldn’t afford it. Obviously, we were able to use common sense because it is obvious who simply could not afford it and which parents were just forgetful/trying to duck the cost.
    As the students’ age increased (middle/high school) the cost of the trip could increase but the opportunity had to be given to earn funds through fundraising. Then, a child who didn’t participate in the fundraiser in a meaningful way could be excluded.
    It sounds complicated but didn’t seem so at the time. Also, I would note that we were not required to have any parents/extra adults on the field trip so there’s that.

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  29. Jan

    It sounds like a great idea to have the kids pay extra, but where I taught the parents had trouble paying for the trip(bus +entrance fee) without any extra costs.
    Some places did have scholarship money and some allowed a certain number of chaperones free per number of kids Our PTA was tiny and had very little money. The administration or teachers paid for kids that could not pay.

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  30. Swiggy

    Go for it Swistle, that’s a great idea! I get so guilty that I can’t help out because I have regular 9-5, I would jump on that in an instant. The only problem is it might mean you have to pick up the phone to make the suggestion ; )

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  31. A

    I am a teacher who has the extrememly awkward job of recruiting parent drivers for my field trips and then having to ask them (tell them, really) that they are on their own if they actually want to SEE the play or the science museum or whatever. They have to pony up. And I teach at a private school, so can you imagine asking a parent who already writes a fat, account-depleting check every quarter for tuition to then pay for admission to someplace I am making their child go, and to which they have graciously offered to chaperon? Awful. So, good on you.

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  32. Mary

    I worship you. Every time I drive on a field trip, I pay $8 for parking downtown, and up to $20 for my ticket. And give up most of a day when I could have been doing something else.

    Of course there is nothing I would rather do than spend time with my kids and their friends, so I’m not complaining, exactly, but it would be SO nice if some of the other parents who never ever drive would chip in some money once in awhile.

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  33. bananafana

    I love this! We actually have to pay all field trip fees at the beginning of the year and I thought we WERE including chaperon fees in that but we weren’t. The problem in our school is apparently that way more parents go than is necessary and then who chooses which are the actual chaperones (and paid for) and who is just going for kicks? Gah!

    Reply

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